by Dansk 449 Replies latest members private
Dansk,
Do you happen to live in Chicago? I ask because I know a few of the Polish brothers here. If you were close, it might be cool to get together. I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I've been through prettty tough times myself, though I'm not sure my experiences quite compare to yours. I pretty much lost my marriage. I'm sure you'll get lots of support here.
Bardzo mi milo, szczescia (what a wild languaage, huh?)
Ron
Welcome to the forum Dansk, and thank you for sharing your story.
I will remember you and your family in my prayers.
you mentioned about spiritually questing after leaving the org....I've found that I struggle to feel strong spiritually on my own at times, without the org....but sharing with others, such as on this board really helps alot! I hope you find comfort and strength and healthy ways to meet your spiritual needs. I've found that having a few close friends to share spiritually minded stuff with....(you don't have to agree on everything, but repect each other where you differ) is better than lots of folks around you who believe what they are told but are not being really true to themselves. I find so hard to be really true to myself sometimes, but to have real inner peace and spiritial happiness I must be true to myself....and that means I cannot go back to the org.....you are so strong for standing up and being true to yourself. As tims moves on (I've been Df'd since 1999) it does get eaiser.....but I was the only Witness in my family so I can only imagine your pain. The first year out of the org for me was excruciating, it's remarkable how much progress you've made in a few weeks...amazing!!!
Keep us posted!
Thanks everyone for your continued support!
Voltaire, I live in Manchester, England. My dad was Danish and my mother Irish. My wife is part Italian. Some mixture, eh, but somewhere in that lot must have been an enormous bag of love, because it's kept us all going.
I'll keep you all updated - thanks for asking. The boys have been great with their mum and I, and our continued perusal of this forum has been mightily strengthening.
My wife was saying just yesterday that she seems to have so much more time on her hands - that's great because previously we were running around like headless chickens, meeting ourselves coming back at times! Life is meant to be enjoyed; love is to be shared - the WTS is the personification of a straight-jacket!
Unconditional love to you all and please keep posting. Seriously, they have been immensely comforting and, shhhhhhh, they've helped my wife really improve (she might be listening!). She cried whilst reading your lovely words - she's looking great today and there's no question that reading other's posts has made her realise that we aren't alone and that REAL love and TRUE friendship are out there.
Our sincerest love and gratitude.
Hi Dansk,
Most people take somewhat longer to finally realize that the BORG is just that, a controlling, mind-killing CULT. Judging by the unusual speed of your cognition of it's true nature, you are to be commended for having a sharp mind.
Oh, and good luck with your daughters. I hope it will all work out for you, but sometimes there's just nothing one can do if the Tower mind-virus is embedded deeply enough. Some people cannot reject it, because it has become part of them.
My wife's on holiday this week and she and our youngest son took our car into the garage for a service. We walked back home whilst the car was being attended to, the walk being a couple of miles long. It was cold, but fresh in the semi-icy wind - but not as cold as what happened right near the end of our journey.
I guess it had to happen. As we were just a few yards from turning the corner into our street who should be coming in the opposite direction but my eldest daughter and her pioneer partner. We all let on to one another as we passed, but my daughter's attempt was noticeably strained and she looked decidedly angry with me. Still, the crack in her mouth emitted a "Hello", so that's something.
It was all over within 2-3 seconds and my wife and I got home, had a coffee and discussed what happened. Both of us agree that it didn't affect us; that it was embarrassing more than anything else as one doesn't quite know what to do/say in such situations. Perhaps we've become hard; perhaps it's because our eldest daughter is married - but we just don't care. Our thoughts are mainly with our youngest daughter as she will now be facing the world on her own, so to speak, now that she will be moving into her new apartment.
Life has to go on. We have two wonderful sons at home who, incidentally, have earmarked the now-vacated daughter's bedroom as a snooker room! "Well, we might as well use it for something," is a typical reply. And you know what? They are right! Youngsters grow up, leave home and start their own life-journeys. All we as parents can do is instill in them love, morals and appreciation for life and all it offers, including being aware of the feelings of others and not to take nature for granted. Goodness, I'm on a philosophical bent this morning!
Well, you did ask to be kept informed!
With your help, we know we'll win in the end. Thanks for listening.
My wife and I have just been reading the thread SEX: We Thank You Jehovah!
We split our sides laughing at some of the posts - the tears streamed down our faces. Absolutely brilliant and just what we needed at this time.
Ha Ha Ha, Ho, Ho, Ho, Tee-Hee-Hee......
What a GREAT site this is!
Dansk. Thanks for keeping us updated. Wife and I have been watching this post with interest and concern.
You said earlier :
My wife was saying just yesterday that she seems to have so much more time on her hands - that's great because previously we were running around like headless chickens, meeting ourselves coming back at times! Life is meant to be enjoyed; love is to be shared - the WTS is the personification of a straight-jacket!
Wife and I always likened life within the org. as being on a treadmill, with no stop button. We experienced the same europhoia as you alude to, when you realize how much time you have now, to " stop and smell the roses "
But that will probably change in time, once your family branches out and begins to enjoy things, together and individually. Things you never had the time for or activities that impeded on your " Christian Responsibilities "
Our lives are once again busy, but a good busy. Kids are involved in school sports, etc. and we spend a lot of time in the summer months, as a family, camping, mountain biking, hiking. All things we never had the time or the " conscience " for.
Regards D & D
Hi Dansk
Glad to see you taking part on the forum.
Makes you realise that you are not alone in what has happened to you.
yours,
Gordy
Dansk..I was so saddened to read how the family is split. I too have lost my daughter , But you mention where will you go. ?Nowhere!! Just to Jesus Christ "OUR" mediator.( not just the 144.000)
"Come to me all you who are heavily laden I will give you rest"The Father told us to listen to HIS SON & The HOLY SPIRIT will teach us all things. Hang in there ..If I can help in any way .God Bless
Dansk,
Iv been reading this thread but have not had a chance to comment until now. I am sorry for the unfortunate circumstance with your daughters, I think most of us here on this board know exactly how you feel. That is why we all come here, to talk to and read comments from others who may be the only ones that truly do understand how we feel.
Your comments as well as how you present them indicates that you are an intelligent person. It looks to be that your intelligence is one of the main reasons you have chosen the new path that you, and some of your family members have embarked on. As with every EXJW on this board you have asked yourself the question "what do I do now"? Well, there are almost as many answers about that thought as there are questions. This board certainly has discussed a good majority of options and most have settled on their own version of spirituality and how they will live out the rest of their lives.
You have only been out a shot while. The reality of it all hasn't really set in yet. The reality that if the JW's are wrong then all their teachings are false and someday you are going to die. That's a real eye opener and that realization is one that six billion people on earth have come to grips with. I know my own mortality was one of the hardest reality checks I personally had to deal with. Growing up thinking I was never going to die messed me up a bit and caused me to not be a person who could deal with any true reality in life.
I have been out 19 years and in that time I have done what the JW's admonish all it's followers not to do. I read. After leaving the JW's I started to read books on topics that were very much frowned on by the religion. Books on philosophy, pagan religions, history of religion, science and psychology. My mind felt like it was being used for the very first time. It becomes painfully clear why the JW's do not want their followers to read books that were not written by their own hand. In reality the "truth" about anything is judged by examining information from both sides of an issue. The JW's in a very deceptive manner claim to give both sides of an issue, but, both sides they present are created by their own view and very specific agenda. They are masters at context manipulation and have used that technique to blindly convince their followers that they have the only truth about life.
Here are a few books that helped open my eyes to the other side of "truth."
The Power of Myth -By Joseph Campbell-
Since you mentioned something about the North American Indian and their thoughts on spirituality you might really enjoy this book. Thinking about your comment, you might have even read this book. If not, I know you will like it.
The Jesus Mysteries- By Timothy Freke & Peter Gandy
This book may open your eyes to the history of the Christian religion and how it was developed. There is very in-depth research in this book and its references are completely listed for the reader do his own research on how the authors came up with their conclusions. This book has rocked the Christian world and Christians would love it if it had never been written. Here are a couple of brief reviews of the book;
-The Jesus Mysteries proposed that the Jews had created their own version of
the ancient Mysteries with Jesus as their Osiris-Dionysus. How could this have happened?
The traditional history paints a picture of the Jews as an insular people…staunchly nationalistic
and fanatically devoted to their religion, fiercely loyal to their one god Jehovah and entirely hostile
to the Paganism of their neighbors. From this perspective, the idea that the Jews could possibly have
adopted the Pagan Mysteries seems unthinkable. And so it would be,
if any of this were true.-
-The Authors back up their thesis (that Christianity was a result of a grafting of The Pagan Mysteries onto a Judaeo-Christian branch) with statements such as the following, condemning the ideological “Church Fathers” of the Early Period, when Christianity was a loose affiliation of conflicting sects (including many, equally conflicting sects of “Gnosticism”)-
Beyond Good and Evil -Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
This is one of my favorite philosophers, his thoughts make me think as well as makes me laugh. The guy can be a real downer (he's an existentialist) but he makes a person think. It should be noted that he was also Hitler and Stalin's favorite philosopher. I think the reason I like him is a bit different from the reason Hitler and Stalin liked him.
Conversations With God -Neil Donald Walsh.
This book was fun to read and gives you an alternative way to look at who god might be. There were parts that made a lot of sense and some parts that were down right funny. It puts the thought of god into more of a human perspective in how a god might not be this blood thirsty ego maniac.
The Wisdom of Insecurity -by Alan W. Watts
This is a book that gives both sides of the science vs religion issue and has a lot of great philosophical thoughts that helps you look at life with a bit of a smile on your face. Watts's philosophy does not try and prove one or the other but instead tries to help people with convictions on both sides get along and think a little.
These are just a few good books that you might want to think about reading. They helped me. I got out before the Internet was available so I had to do a lot of my own thinking. I have never taken one book as an absolute truth about anything but instead have simply opened my mind to alternative thoughts that I was at one time forbidden to investigate. To let you know where my head is at, I am NOT a Christian nor a follower of any religious philosophy. If a person needs to put me into a category I would probably be labeled as an agnostic. I don't believe in the bible at all and only see it as a book of religious myth that has been used to manipulate gullible people. I also see the holy books from other religions as doing the same.
I have come to one absolute conclusion with all my reading and research about life and religion. That is, I love my three sons.
Take care and enjoy the journey.
Dave
