Topics Started by Matty
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8
Contagious?
by Matty ina teacher asks her class to use the word contagious.. james, the class swot, gets up and says, "last year i got the measles and my mum said it was contagious".. "well done james" says the teacher, "can anyone else try"?.
katie, a sweet little girl with pigtails says "my grandma says there's a bug going around, and its contagious".
"well done, katie" says the teacher.
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8
Top Ten Features in the New Watchtower Library CD
by Matty inas you know, the new new watchtower library cd is soon to be with us all, and as one of the beta-testers i would like to share with you some of the more surprising new features of the cd: .
top ten features in the new watchtower library cd
resurrection feature - after your computer crashes, it allows you to start up where you left off as if nothing ever happened.. before: "19,445 search results" now: "a great crowd of search results".
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19
Alternative lyrics to kingdom songs
by Matty inhave you ever sung alternative lyrics to kingdom songs during a meeting or a convention?
to qualify they have to sound very similar to the actual words so you can get away with it without too much attention being drawn to yourself.
here are three examples, i'm sure there are many more, so please feel free to add!.
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3
Genuine Reasons Pioneers Gave...
by Matty in...for not reaching their monthly goal .
sick, many things came up .
i got married or was given in marriage.
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It's impossible for God to lie!
by Matty inbit of background from a previous thread:.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=27140&site=3#348005.
is the bible saying that god cannot physically lie, or that he simply chooses not to?
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38
The Nephilim - What can I say!
by Matty inim sure nothing surprises the people who regularly post here.
but what really shocks me now is that as a child i genuinely believed some of the most preposterous, stupid and moronic things ever committed to papyrus.. take the nephilim.
well they were mutants.
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3
Jephthah's Promise - Oh yeah?
by Matty inoccasionally i will vent my spleen about various bible characters i dont like.
i hope i dont bore all of you who would rather talk about limp bizkit or the size of your willies.. all my life i have had to put up with these seriously flawed individuals being described as marvellous examples to all jws.
ive already had a moan about david, now its jephthahs turn.
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Did U find King David a rude crude dude?
by Matty inexpatbrit i think im gonna upset some more fundies here!
king david, what a lovely guy!
polygamist of course but that was accepted in those days.
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30
Did U find Jesus rude?
by Matty injesus was a nice guy most of the time, but don't you think hes a bit rude and thoughtless sometimes?.
the watchtower today discussed the supposedly marvelous example that jesus showed to youths today, citing his escapade at 12 at the temple.
what hit home to me was that he was missing for three days - three days!
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21
JW's relationship problems?
by Matty inthe relating to non-jw's thread made me think a lot about myself and where i am and what im doing now.
i have to figure out where im going wrong!
has anyone had similar experiences to me as far as relationships with non-witnesses are concerned?.