(To be read as if you are listening to a bad car dealer commercial)
Hi folks Crazy Hibiscus here....
Come on down to Good God Savior House.
We have UNBELIEVABLE deals on salvation this week !
But hurry time is wasting.
You must stop in here at Good God Savior House THIS WEEK to claim your salvation.
We have low, low prices (sacrifices) on all late model bibles....crosses...rosary beads...YOU NAME IT.
Call me nuts, Call me Crazy, Call me Hibiscus....But come on down to GGSH.
Lord Jeeeesus died for you, can't you at least do the same for him.
Get off the couch....shut off the TV....donate your time and money at the Good God Savior House.
Act Fast!
Avoid the long lines to "judge" your credit history. We have Armegeddon Finance on site to approve your tithe.
Good reputation, bad reputation, any reputation, we don't care,,,,, you are preapproved for SALVATION!
It's that easy. Just embrace da LORD Jebus.....and you will drive home today with SALVATION!
BUT WAIT !
There's MORE.....today only, mention my name.....get a G-Force Jesus for your car.
G-Force Jesus has Jesus "holding on to the cross for dear life" knowing the way you drive.
You can now say you truly have Jebus as a co-pilot.
Quantities are LIMITED....so act fast.
So come on down to Good God Salvation House.
And when you get there tell CrazyHibiscus sent ya.
(Operators standing by)