Sitting or Standing?

by LittleToe 136 Replies latest jw friends

  • lazyslob
    lazyslob

    The important guestion is, how many times are you allowed to shake after, without risking to end up in JC for masturbation? 4? 8?

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    My husband's mother taught him and his brothers to sit while urinating. Hubby still does to this day, at home. Now my boys do also. Cant say it cuts down on the urine finding a way outside the toilet though.

    Josie

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Jeannie:
    Was that a used tissue?
    LOL

    Josie:
    ROFL
    Well, that taps that theory on the head, then

  • the_classicist
    the_classicist

    Sit-down urination, just seems so unnatural. They don't have toilets to sit down on in nature... if a man had to sit in the forest to go, he'd likely make a mess of himself.

  • Leolaia
    Leolaia

    LittleToe.....No, I mean an actual cup that can be placed between one's legs...press hard enough so that it's basically air tight and it should catch most of the pee. Am I the only one that's thought of this? LOL (I can't believe I'm talking about this! )

    That way, squatting makes no mess on the seat!

  • Eric
    Eric

    OK now, this is getting out of hand...

    My Mom tried to get us boys to pee while sitting, not that she was a single Mom or domineering (she wielded an effective wooden spoon to chase us off from climbing the furniture, but if some real dastardly craft had been developed, it was always "Wait until your Father gets home!") but simply that we lived in a rusticly styled home, and the walls in our house including the bathroom were solid tongue in groove planking, and there was no way to get the pee smelliness completely out after badly aimed effort.

    I found that after trying the sit method, I wasn't getting full relief, I'd finish the sit method, stand up and feel like there was a little bit more unfinished business. I reported my findings to my brother who agreed that it was not proper for a boy to pee like a girl, but that we should endeavour to perfect our aim as no reasonable person would argue against a bathroom wall free of pee-stains.

    We developed pee aiming accuracy as a sport, first using the target-in-the-bowl-weapon-ranging technique. The idea was to put something really floaty into the bowl and then piss forcibly down upon it, tracking its bobbing attempts to re-surface and trying to keep it underwater for the entire duration. You can believe me, keeping a wine cork well down does develop the hand-eye-penis coordination.

    However successful our efforts at accuracy were becoming, this form of training was not achieving the desired outcome of a clean bathroom wall, a fact that was brought to bear through a stern wooden spoon reminder. My brother and I modified our sport of peeing accuracy to include our Mothers frank talk about how a man can find the quiet spot on the upper zone of the bowl side to make the flow "Swoosh" splashlessly down into the awaiting waters below. Now the game was to see who could get the most bowl rotations out of the floating bit we would place near the waters edge.

    As with anything my brother and I did together, the competition elaborated, soon we were placing two pieces of identically floaty bits (small flecks of cedar wood performed admirably) at opposite sides of the bowl, and we would try to get one piece to catch up and lap the other one. The games finally culminated when we would both stand at the bowl and attempt to co-join our streams at the point of best swirl contact and get the bowl water positively racing.

    The plank wall was, of course, eventually covered over with an easily sanitized arborite cladding.

    Eric

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC

    COL

    *IPSec reconfigures all of his pre concieved notions about Leolaia*

    :)

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    I can attest to being a sitter. I prefer to sit as to go thru all the trouble of standing, lifting the seat as well as in some instances, the lid. By the time I've gone thru that obstacle course, now to un-house the Jimmei, take aim, and fire, I could have easilly saved myself the agravation of all those complex movements, by dropping the trousers and making myself comfortable by having a seat. There's, also, no need to feel rushed when taking a whizz while sitting. You can have a moment to relax, refresh yourself, contemplate briefly your thoughts during a minor moment of meditation. When one sits, you often have the ease and availability to have gases expelled which often times are not pre-programmed into the wonderfully created body, as rule while standing. If they do, they have to be forced out, as opposed to if one is sitting, the body now, is in a more natural alignment to have such said gases expelled. The other benefit is when sitting, your body becomes more conscious to it's inheirent need to evacuate waste material. If it is you are already in a sitting position to do so in the first place, one's moments in the lavatory can now be even more refreshing. The body is not conditioned to responding to its need to evacute the solid waste products, so if you become accustomed to sitting, your body will be more responsive in adressing that all too important need. There's truly, no greater feeling than leaving the rest room knowing you've gone to every possible avenue to remove the waste deposits from our urinary and intestinal tracts. Leaving you with a much fuller feeling of refreshment, and the ablity to get further along in your day. To leave one's body to unfinished business while attending to the daily needs of waste removal can leave you anxious, confused and just not up to snuff to giving the attention of the day, all it truly deserves. So, for you too egotiscally reserved to have a seat while taking a leak, I offer you a challenge to yourselves, have a seat, take a load off, be gentle with yourself. To seat oneself is an opportunity to actually take a stand for the unfortunate sexist and egotistical stance that we as men also need to be ridding ourselves of. So there. I've said it!!! Just do it!!! Just sit down, It'll come to be the best 15 minutes you could have ever given yourself. And besides, my wife won't stand for me to stand and pee!!!

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Jeannie:Was that a used tissue?
    LOL

    Gracious, no! It was simply lovely, pink and scented with Channel No. 5. No idea why Ballistic didn't like it... Such a sensitive boy...

    J

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC

    Philosophically I agree with you proph, but I just cant stand dangling down into the water when I sit. How do you get passed that?

    Thanks

    Sincerely

    IPSec

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