Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy (page 7)

MelbaToast

Dear UR: I read this post over and over, yet I still cannot see how a woman could do this to her own children. Please let us know (PM if you need to ) if you need anything.

My thoughts and prayers, Melba

LittleToe

How are you this morning, buddy?
Any news on the girls?

You're all at the forefront of our thoughts.

My god...this is a tragedy in all the sense of the word. Too many people here have more helpful words then I can offer but I do send my prayers & thoughts to you and I implore you to rely on your family for strength in getting through this. Most of all, when things calm down, you should look for therapy not only for yourself but for the girls especially...to be in an environment like that for a year has undoubtedly colored their mind to an extent that almost none of us could even imagine.

I'm not even that religious these days but I truly am praying that everything works out for you.

codeblue

(((UR)))

I am so sorry for all you are experiencing.........I feel so bad for your daughters too.

Please take good care of you........getting a good counselor to help you and your daughters recover is vital.

My prayers are with you and your sweet daughters.

many hugs to you,

CodeBlue

Balsam

UR, your living a nightmare. I hope you your daughters will be ok. Your wife is very powerfully dangerous to herself and anyone around her. There is so much mental illness among the JW. I remember talking to other witnesses that had come into it as older teens or adults, and wondered by people raised in it were so nuts. We just could not see the family dynamics that caused it.

Warm hugs,

Ruth

teejay

UR,

So sorry for what happened to your babies. I hope things return to normal one day.

You were a good father ? a champion ? in doing everything you could to help them. If it weren't for you, the situation could have been much worse.

Take care.

((((( UR & Family )))))

Lady Lee

(((((UR and girls))))

I don't even know what to say my heart is so pained for all of you.

Xandris posted some excellent info. Print it out for when you need it.

Many places have a Victims of Violence support team for people who experience traumas. Check with the police to see if they have one and can connect you to them. They can provide some initial support and point you in the direction of long term support.

UR It is common for people fresh from a trauma to relive the experience and second guess their responses. Normally the first response is to try to talk the person out so you did the right thing. There is no way you could have know just how imbalanced she had become. Your older daughter is in a lot of denial so please be gentle with her. She will be torn between what her mother has taught her and done and her love for her sister and her relationship with you. There is no magic solution. This one will take time to undo the damage - perhaps even more time than your baby. At some point she will have to realize how she was manipulated into allowing the hurt to her sister to happen. This will be devastating and needs to be dealt with through professional help. Poor girl. So young and so much to deal with. As much as you will want the old her back you will need to deal with who she has become. This has altered all of you. If you begin to realize how much this has changed your life I'm sure you can imagine what living with their mother has done to them over the last year or so.

We can't predict what imbalanced people will do. We can only deal with the moment and hope it is the best. You tried your best. Even the police agreed you could try so you weren't wrong to try. And as hard as it is to imagine it could have been worse. You and your daughters are alive. You will have a future Hang in there and get every drop of support you can and even then ask what else is there.

But as much as your children need you YOU must take care of yourself. That includes eating and sleeping. You will be no use to them if you are not taking care of yourself

Lee who sends a lot of prayers and thoughts your way

Gadget

Thinking of you.

bem

Hello (((UR & family))) we're all very much thinking of you and send our love and energy to you all hoping each day you find much needed 'strength'

Dorothy.

Utopian Reformist

I cannot believe how much helpful and consoling advice and support I have received from all of you in just 24 hours! I love all of you with admiration, respect and with loyalty.

AlanF, just seeing your post and seeing you mention my name was an instant boost and I almost fell apart again just from the joy. Teejay, bem, Xandria and so many others, I can't thank you enough.

Last night, I met with detectives and investigators from the Rhode Island State Police and I provided a written and recorded statement/affadavit to summarize the events of Friday, October 29, 2004.

It's funny, I had visited the house on Tuesday, October 25 just to say hello and Tonya had disabled the gas furnace and boiler in the basement, thus the heating system was not working. I noticed the house was unusually cold and that she was using the kitchen oven for heat. I commented and asked her to stop disconnecting things and to stop removing things and to stop shutting off services because she was causing problems and making a lot of extra work and repairs for everyone.

She never commented. I remember telling the girls I was going to dress up as Mr. Spock for Halloween and that I was attending a few parties. I had promised to stop by to show them my outfit. I remember it was the last time I saw the little one alive, normal, and I teased her as I always did by tugging on her little toes and tickling her feet. I keep crying day and night because I can only remember the outfit she had on, but not her face. I can't remember her face and all of our family pictures were destroyed in the fire.

Today, I am going back to the wreckage (which is a very heavy situation in itself) and every time I see any of the children's belongings, I fall apart.

Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy