Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy (page 57)

hubert

Oh, and hugs to you, too. (((((Morton68)))))

Hubert

Aude_Sapere

Mario -

I am certainly no expert on legal matters. (Just so we are all clear on this point!)

Seems to be an awful lot of work to get the house repaired and argue in the courts for transfer of ownership so that you can then go to creditors, etc.

I think I'd be pretty tempted to file bankruptcy and let the interested parties handle the mess of the house. Seems that it would free you up more quickly to get your life back on track.

I've never filed bk but seems like this is a time when it might be entirely appropriate.

Professional advise is probably warranted.

Best of luck in working thru this.

bebu

Thanks hubert!!! What an inspiration you are.

(((Mario))) Hubert is right about losing your job being a positive. What you do need is legal help. I do not know of any lawyers in Providence.

I think it might be helpful to look in the Yellow pages under "Social Service" organizations. If that heading is not there, try community services. If that fails, call the Catholic church nearest you and ask for their relief services number (maybe it's called Catholic Family Services); the Catholic church is a big player in social service networks, and they can help you plug into the system by directing you to resources/agencies for help. No, you don't have to be Catholic; in fact, where I live they hire so many non-Catholics that the Catholics are the minority.

If you keep hitting a brick wall , call a crisis telephone line. Those guys are well-connected into the service agency network and can refer you to people who can help who are nearby.

We are all rooting for you, Mario!!!!!!!

bebu

outnfree

((((Mario))))

I have been thinking about you alot this past week, and feel terrible about your job loss. Even if you, personally, are understanding about it, I think it sucks. Of course, if they fired you, you're eligible for unemployment whereas if they had given you administrative leave you'd likely have NO income at all.... So there's that.

The other thing I wanted to mention is that there are different types of bankruptcy to file, even for individuals. It's not just corporations that get to choose which "Chapter" to file. I don't know the differences, but you should definitely consult an attorney on that. Maybe you CAN profit from the sale of the home.

It should not be difficult AT ALL for you to get the court to appoint a Law Guardian pronto for Tonya. (BTW -- If you don't wish to see her, don't let the staff at the hospital prod you into it. It sounded to me like you were vastly relieved not to have had to face her the other night.) If you are only asking for 50% of the marital assets and the other 50% will be used to pay for Tonya's prison and court costs, the state will be happy that they're not footing the entire bill if, in Rhode Island as in some other states, the inmates are actually charged a monthly fee.

The Catholic Services idea was a good one (thanks, Bebu). They will help you wade through the quagmire of various options available to you -- not at law firm rates!

I don't know about the others here, but I'm not anxiously checking my mail for any thank you note. I realize that they should go out and that the process of writing them out is part of a helpful ritual to further the grieving process, but I don't think you should feel pressured to do that now with everything else that's going on. Maybe set a date sometime in January that you will sit down to do them all. If you have the date set, know that you WILL get them done next month, then it might be easier to tackle some of the other, necessary-to-survival stuff that should be your priority, IMNSHO.

Hugs and energy are flowing your way, Mario!

out

Xandria

Ask and ye shall recieve.

http://www.treasury.ri.gov/news/r-cvc-final-passage.htm

http://www.tre-angeli.com/interest.htm

http://www.rijustice.state.ri.us/voca/VOCA/Helpline.htm

http://www.rijustice.state.ri.us/voca/

http://www.rijustice.state.ri.us/voca/VOCA/ag.htm.cnt.htm

http://www.rijustice.state.ri.us/voca/VOCA/CapitalCity.htm

http://www.rijustice.state.ri.us/voca/VOCA/Federalhill.htm Look into Victims Compensation.

http://www.crossroadsri.org/crisis_intervention.htm

http://www.riredcross.org/10-27-2003.htm

http://www.famresri.org/csp.html

http://www.baddteddy.com/law/victims.htm

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/fund/sbsmap/ovcpfri1.htm

http://ojjdp.ncjrs.org/pubs/fedresources/appen-07.html

http://mova.missouri.org/viccomp.htm

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/pdftxt/NCJ189218.txt

http://www.coventry-task-force.com/sexual.html

http://www.cvtc-slr.org/survivors_factsheet_26.html

http://www.glocesterri.org/helpline-reference.htm

http://www.realhotdeals.com/resource_center/grants/general_resources_main.htm

http://www.lesko.com/help/GeneralHelp.htm

Also look into wrongful termination laws, look into leave and absence laws of your company and state.

http://www.riag.ri.gov/criminal/victim.php

http://www2.sec.state.ri.us/feb_event/

http://www.novabucks.org/default.asp?portalid=19

X

Utopian Reformist

Thx to Hubert, Bebu, and several others for the great suggestions. I have to admit, because of the lengthy delays in the state court system (we know all court systems are slow), I am losing patience. I know these types of cases take a very long time to settle and resolve, but, in the meantime, my losses keep increasing and my options are getting more difficult.

This morning, I will file for unemployment compensation in MA and then follow-up on some of the links posted by Xandria. Basically, if I can keep my head above water, meaning my rent, my cell phone, my DSL, and my vehicle, I will be fine. Food is not an issue since I have been fasting twice a week for over a year now and I hardly eat anyway.

I am fine with clothing and have recovered 75% of my tools and equipment from the wreckage. I just have a few more things and then I will be all set. Once I am satisfied that the most important items have been removed from the wreckage (major appliances that were less than a year old which I hate to lose; some solid oak furniture that can be sold; chrome steel shelving that I can use in the apartment; office furniture; and some personal effects) then losing the home to tax sale will no longer matter to me.

I have already lost everything else. Marina will not agree to live with me unless I have the attorneys remove the restraining order and allow her to visit with her mother. I understand her mother is all she feels she has left. However, I feel like I am the only one (besides JWD) that remembers a little girl died last month. Already, it seems like Marina and the Fullers are just ready to move on and start focusing on Tonya.

I am just speechless. I can't believe the audacity of these people and the influence on Marina to just start requesting arrangements and making plans to focus on Tonya. I have said it from the beginning and I will not budge, out of respect for Talia's memory, out of my own personal dignity, and out of my culture, I cannot forgive Tonya and her family. I cannot and will not share anything with any of them ever again, neither my daughter, my time or my resources. I will not budge.

If Marina cannot accept my right and my feelings, and expects me, the man who saved her to accept only her feelings and theirs, then she is miscalculating the situation and will be making a temporary mistake. My door will never close to her, and I would save her again from anything. But, I cannot deny who I am and I cannot deny Talia justice.

So, I may be losing the home after all out of a lack of patience and resources to continue moving forward battling Tonya's mental state to complete divorce proceedings. I may also file for that personal bankruptcy. In the end,some of these shackles and chains have to be loosened in order for me to make some sort of progress and move forward out of and away from this tragedy.

Every day,it appears my life is stuck in tragedy mode, stuck in administrative entanglements, stuck in legal stalemates, and stuck emotionally in a depressive grieving suicidal state of mind. I am really trying and thank all of you for your help!

Just yesterday, I opened more mail that had not been opened and I read some of the nicest cards and personal letters from JWD friends. I love all of you very much and am forever tied together and bound to you all.

I promise that once I have ample time, I will be writing all of you back and sending some information and cards from the funeral services. I have also been chatting and spending time with Hubert, who by the way is extremely comical, witty, funny and a blessing.

I tell you that without LDH (LISA, my hero!), without Hubert, Avishai, Ashitaka, Xandria, CruznHeart, BigTex, CCRyder, Bebu, Bem, and the list goes on and on...I would not be making it thru another day.

So, after all of the losses, after all of the separations, after all of the pain, there might be a light called freedom up the road, up the hill and I hope to get closer to it, starting today!

MJB

Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy

hubert

Aude_Sapere

bebu

outnfree

Xandria

Utopian Reformist

hubert

bem

Mystery

hubert

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