Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy (page 54)

Mystery

Narkissos wrote:

He retained the custody but let his son live with his mother. A couple of years later he was back with his father, whereas I was stuck with the abusive JW family.

Mario - at the very least consider what narkissos said. Do no give up all legal right to Marina.

I understand that you need a break from everything. But during this time when you feel you have nothing else to give; physically, mentally, financially or emotionally, please do not give away your daughter.

If you decide in the future that you do not want her - she is already with the in-law's - what has been lost? Nothing.

When your strength is renewed and it will be. When you have regained "yourself" and you will. When this journey comes to a close and a new one begins, you may realize that Marina wanted you beside her all the time.

Emotionally you may not be able to deal with this right now. But do not let your despair, your exhaustion, and your ?I can?t do anything?? mode give you an EXCUSE to give away your living daughter. There is no excuse to GIVE AWAY your child simply because you do not want to/are not emotionally, financially able to care for them at the moment. Because in a ?few moments? down the road you will be able to financially care for Marina. Emotionally care for Marina. And spiritually care for Marina.

If need be ? TEMPORARLY let Marina live with your in-laws ? terms ? Marina continues therapy and your have visitation. Don?t give her up; don?t give her to your in-laws.

By giving legal guardianship to your IN-LAWS (not even her mother) you journey to get her out will be more extensive due to you giving her up at this point.

Don't let a moment of weakness, a moment of having "no hope", a moment of "having no energy to go on", a moment of emotional break-down cause you to give up on Marina. She is your daughter.

Deborah

avishai

I agree with Xandria, I have also worked in this field for years. I love ya man. Call me if you want. I'm definitely here a lot.

NewLight2

Mario,

on this thread: Dr. Phil wants to talk CULTS It is on page 2 of that thread.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/80010/2.ashx
NewLight2

Fleur

edited, thought better of giving an opinion, it's over my head I have no business doing so. I defer to those with more experience. Xandria's post gets to the heart of it.

I'm thinking of you Mario.

hugs

essie

Utopian Reformist

I have finally had a chance to read the new posts from all of you, and I have been amazed at the simple wisdom and good advice that just poured in when I really need it the most. I want to thank all of you for your professional help and for your personal help, all of you knwo what and who I mean when I say those words.

The whole situation with Marina is complex. Today, I was just informed that my employer terminated me without cause. Although I already know the reason(s). It's because of the constant interruptions, erratic schedule and basically sub-par performance. I can't blame them even though the business world is less than sympathetic.

If I had a nest egg, I would have taken the family medical leave without pay and saved my job. However, due to maintinaing the expenses at two households, I was not able to use that option. So now, my custody situation is even more fragile than before since I now cannot demonstrate fiscal responsibility to care for a minor child.

I was already warned by the DCYF agents that all cases have a timeline and they expect to see reunification and re-establishment of the family in under a year's time, or the state decides to file custody documents in court. That leaves the doorway open for any other family members with resources to make an attempt to petition for custody.

Last night, Marina and I finally had a soft-spoken conversation about the living arrangements and her future. She mentioned that Aunt Kim Fuller is more than happy to have Marina move in and leave the evil grandparents and attend the local high school with her cousin who is a senior.

She also said that Aunty Kim does NOT mind keeping Marina for the entire remainder of this school year, and possibly the next, but, Marina is ignoring the fact that Aunty Kim has already told me she does NOT want permanent custody or responsibility. Marina does not believe this fact.

Marina believes that her JW family wants her and will keep her and then live happily ever after and possibly wait for Tonya's sentence to carry out and reunite with her mother.

I know she will be in for some bitter disappointments. I know better because I am an adult and have been burned by these people so many times in the past.

Now, Marina does not realize that other doctors and therapists that I see on a separate basis are concerned that she will be starting school much too soon after this tragedy, and that once the trials and cases begin, the media will have a field day and Marina may find herself in difficult positions with other children.

She thinks she can handle the upcoming stress and undue attention. What if she can't? What if it becomes too much? Where will she run, where will she turn? What will she do? Will she react liek Tonya? If she does, who is responsible for her actions as a minor?

It was NOT my idea for her to enter school so quickly. It was not my idea for her to remain in the US while adults, attorneys, and the media play out the tragedy. It was not my idea for her to move around from ex-in-law to ex-in-law. But, all of the experts intervened, interfered and meddled with my ability to reason with my daughter and choose the best long-term course of action....a sabbatical in europe with immeidate family and distanced from the media.

Now, that is not possible because she cannot be trusted to cooperate. So, once again, the JW in-laws have interfered and created another problem for me, which they cannot handle or will not take responsibility.

Can you see why I want to just throw in the towel with these people? tHEY MAKE LIFE SICKENING.

NewLight2

((((((Mario and Marina)))))

I'm so sorry to hear that your employer let you go. What a heartless thing to do right now to you! I hope that you qualify for unemployment benefits and that the DCYF agents will look on that as steady income until you are able to find another full-time source of income.

Thanks for keeping us updated,

NewLight2

candidlynuts

wow mario.. i dont really know what to say.. my instincts say its time to take some time for your self and get some of the things that YOU need done.. look at the things you CAN accomplish and focus on those, the things you cant do anything about right now, let those slide for a bit. get you together. get yourself in a healthier position to do something about marina. you know she's in for unlpleasantness, shouldnt you be stronger and ready for when the opportunity comes to pick her up when her jw world falls short of providing what she is going to need?

like i say..this is just instinct not knowlege.. i know your facing impossible tasks but i also think that you taking at least some time to strengthen yourself is going to be better for all of you in the long run.

my continued thoughts and prayers for you.

hugs

candy

codeblue

(((Mario)))

I am so sorry to hear of these latest developments.

Your employer is very heartless, considering the huge stresses you have been under.

The company my husband works for seems to help take care of those during extremely stressfilled times. His boss, found out he was in 4th stage cancer, needing immediate time off for treatments. Certain employees where able to donate paid time off (and paid to him at HIS payrate). My husband donated 3 weeks of his PTO.......There have been many others that have done this....he could be off work for a couple of months now that chemo treatments are happening.

I sincerely hope you can find employment quickly....you certainly don't need to go thru any more stress.

Anyways....you have received a lot of advise about your daughter.... I have seen my new husband's kids wreak havoc in their life, when he and his exwife were divorced (she was a JW and turned into the worst alcoholic ever) the children were allowed to live with whatever parent they wanted. My husband said, that he expected the kids to live with him, the solid, mature parent...2 of them lived with the alcoholic....their teen years were full of strife...HE regrets allowing them to make that decision of which parent to live with and he wishes he had full custody.

I am just passing this on, for comparison values...I know you are going thru a lot of crucial decisions and now with worries about work. Could Marina temporarily stay with someone until you get suitable work and you still have full custody?

You have constantly been on my mind and heart with all the sadness that has happened to you. If NOdenial and I had been close, we would be there in "person" to give you the support that you really need.

Many hugs and positive vibes are being sent,

CodeBlue

bem

Dear ((((((Mario)))))) Take care of you. I want to say to you your still in our hearts and on our minds.Sorry about the job. how callous is that!

Dorothy

Fleur

Today, I was just informed that my employer terminated me without cause.

What kind of heartless, horrible company would DO this to you??? I cannot believe this... ((((((((((UR))))))))) I am so sorry for all that you are going through. I wish I had something more eloquent to say, but it all comes down to that. I am so, so sorry.

hugs

essie

Ex-JW Mother attempts suicide with children and fails! My Family Tragedy

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