by Utopian Reformist 1242 Replies latest members private
Hey UR. Like so many more before me have said... I am sooo sorry for everything that has happened to your family. I am not one to let emotions out but I cried reading what happened. Know that I will be thinking of you and your girls and I hope that everything goes well for you.
Kansas District Overbeer
Good Morning (((((UR & babies)))) as your daughter progresses were sure you'll be busier and stessed more. since I'll be gone most of today. I wanted to send you my best regards and I'm thinking of you and your family today.
My thoughts too have been drawn many times to you and your children.
If they allow various items into her room (Fear of infections etc.) -
There may be a lot of restrictions about what she can and cannot have so talk with the hospital staff and see what can be arranged.
The hours when you aren't there might be the hardest and longest for her. You will have to return to work and time will be an enemy for both of you. Helping to keep her mind busy and active will help her in her struggles.
And thank you for your updates.I hope they are as helpful to you to share as they are for us to continue to in our support
My heart goes out to you and your daughters. My son was in the NICU for 2 months and it was so hard to watch all the things he went thru in his fight to live. Everyday there were new things to face, ups and downs, but he grew stronger and he is still my little fighter. You being there for your daughter will help her to fight as well. She must have a very strong spirit . There is nothing in the world that is harder than going thru something like you are going thru as a parent, and sometimes you can feel helpless, but you are going to be her greatest sorce of strength now. Just know that you are in our hearts, prayers and thoughts and so many of us wish we could be there , in person, to support you, but since we can't be there, we will be here waiting to hear how you and your girls are doing.
Sending love to you and the girls......., Dede
This monrning at 09:00AM, EST, Tonya was found incompetent to participate in the mandatory bail hearing. Thus, she was remanded to the prison's psychiatric hospital for further evaluation. The only positive result is that she is being held in custody without bail.
The major negative obstacle resulting from this evaluation is that this afternoon at 2:00PM, EST, the RI State Family Court (Judge Murray, Room 5F), is supposed to hear the following motions and petitions:
1. Abuse Petition filed against Tonya in order to document endangering conduct, behavior and alert the court of potential danger
2. Motion for Order of Restraint, this was filed by DCYF (children's services in RI) to prevent any contact or communication
3. Petition for Dissolution of Marriage and Divorce Petition, these were filed to terminate marital rights, re-acquire marital assets and property (previously owned and paid for by me) and to create the necessary vehicle for obtaining custody rights.
4. Motion for Temporary & Joint Custody, this provides joint custody of the children between the DCYF agency and myself. Since there is an ongoing investigation, and I too have to be reviewed, custody is shared with the agency until a final disposition is reached.
Now, because Tonya was found incompetent this morning, my divorce may not go through today. My attorney assures me that at the very least, I will receive all property and assets (big deal), but this Judge Murray is a stickler for details and covers all grounds in order to prevent appeals originating from his caseload. Thus, without Tonya being present, or if she is present and incompetent, I may wind up still married to her despite the crime and tragedy.
I'll tell you, when it rains, it pours.
(((((((UR))))))))
Yes, it seems to pour sometimes...
But you are assured of a divorce and custody, whether it takes short or long time. I have a neighbor whose son is abused by his mother, and custody has been difficult to get.
It seems to me that waiting for something, whether something good or bad, is one of the most intolerable things in life! Patience is a virtue, truly!!
Take care and hang in there. Let us know how Talia's doing...
bebu
but this Judge Murray is a stickler for details and covers all grounds in order to prevent appeals originating from his caseload.
While this "setback" may feel like a negative I think in the long run it will work for you. Better to have a judge that makes sure she doesn't have a chance to appeal the decision than to have one who just wants to push cases through the court and let someone else worry about the appeal problems. This might take longer but I think it makes a lot of sense - a real lot for you and the girls
I guess Lady Lee is right. As much as I hate to admit it, I would rather avoid an appeal down the road when Tonya is declared fit. So, I will have to settle for whatever the court affords us today. I am leaving work early in a few minutes to make the drive and pick up some supporters.
I was asked by Judge Murray's chambers staff whether or not it will be necessary to staff the court room with additional sherrif's and deputy's. Of course, my answer is no. Since I cannot perform justice according to my wishes, there is no point in losing control and bringing additional problems into my life.
I can only hope the the unwritten rules of justice that are carried out by the inmate population will have their opportunity to rectify matters on behalf of my daughter.
Awwww((((UR)))) Don't waste time or energy on negative things, Hoping for the best for all concerned will be less draining on you and your girls. Revenge { I understand the feeling} may seem sweet but IMO it will harm your psychie, We're here for you and want the best for you and your children. Stay strong { LIVESTRONG}and let us know how Talia is progressing.
Dorothy
{{ tight hugs }}
Love, sKally
