TORN APART

by Dansk 449 Replies latest members private

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41

    (((Ian))) I am sooo happy that you are feeling better. I may not say much, but, I do keep tabs on you and your condition. Thank you for bringing this thread to the top. I had to contact my family last night to find out how my mom was doing.......she just had a cataract removed and has a heart condition........she is susceptible to sudden death and has a pacemaker. I have had the blues on and off lately about them and their shunning of me........I've been DF'd for about 6 years now.........my mom told me that my b-i-l was just appointed an elder and of course that bothered me tremendously, as I have always hoped secretly that they would join me.........he's always been a bit on the fringes.......and I've been missing my nephews........I have no children from my 20 year marriage.....and we are now divorced.......suffice it to say that alot of emotions are bubbling away under the surface and sometimes they emerge...........but, this thread helped me to put everything back into perspective. Like you, I have no doubts as to my decision to leave, even tho they DF'd me, I had already made the decision to leave and the DF'ing was just part of the whole process, I just miss my family at times, like any normal human being. Thanks again, for your story........

    Love and hugs,

    Terri

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Hi Terri,

    I am deeply touched that you should be interested in my story when you have had such an horrendous time of it yourself. I'm truly sorry for your mom's condition and the fact that you are being shunned and can't see your nephews. It's situations like that that reinforce my decision to leave was the correct one. There is just no Christian love in that organisation - but there's reams of it here on JWD!

    My fleshly sister has just this minute left and also an old friend of 30 years popped in to see me with his girlfriend. They'd come up from London for a weekend away in Manchester and they made a special effort to visit before literally going straight back. None have ever been JWs - and none ever deserted me whilst I was one. Unfortunately, I deserted them in the sense that I felt being a JW I had no time for worldly friends and a fleshly sister whose lifestyle I didn't like.

    Now, I see them for whom they all really are - genuine loving people who never gave up on me. See, I'm being blessed already!

    Love to you, Terri. Don't despair and keep your head held high - which is where it rightly belongs. It is we who are the true Christians here (even if some of us aren't actually Christian by denomination).

    Ian

  • Alleymom
    Alleymom
    I'm bringing this back to the top in case its of use to jwbot

    Thanks, Marjorie

    Aaaack! No wonder you wrote and asked if I was ok! My brain must REALLY be going! I totally forgot that I was supposed to look up that link for jwbot's thread and try sending it again. (But I see that you found it anyway!!!) I'm glad to see you posting here in the "original" thread once in awhile. It's always worth bringing this one "btt". Hugs, Marjorie

  • Alleymom
    Alleymom

    It's been six months since this thread has been brought back to the top. With all the newcomers on the board, I think it's worth bringing this one back.

    For those of you who may be reading this thread for the first time, we have weekly prayer vigils for Ian on Tuesday evenings, at his request. If you watch the board on Mondays, you will see notice of the upcoming vigil.

    Dansk was hospitalized last week and had almost 9 liters of fluid drained from one lung. The update about that, with emails from Claire, can be found here:

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/94942/1.ashx

    Marjorie

  • Alleymom
    Alleymom

    BTT

  • Dansk
    Dansk





    My younger daughter, Stephanie, is coming back to live at home. I shan't go into the details, but only to say that she still has her JW head on. Claire, the boys and I are treading very carefully and have told her that we will not put any pressure on her. I know the times ahead could be difficult - it hasn't helped my being so seriously ill - but I'd be glad of any suggestions.

    We have barred all JWs from coming to the house and while Stephanie isn't happy about it that's the way it has to be. While I was in hospital for an appointment I spotted an Awake magazine left lying around for people to read. It made me feel sick (even the chemo hadn't done that ).

    We're hoping that Stephanie will settle in again, but she's not a child anymore (she's 21). Of course, I blame myself for bringing her up in the cult in the first place. It has left a nagging hole in my heart - but I'm hoping we can be reconciled over it. Unfortunately, an elder's wife continually takes Stephanie under her wing and I know that if that bond could be broken it would be better for all of us. I need Stephanie to see that the friendship she has with the elder's wife is very much a conditional friendship. For now, we're just letting her move in and settle down. She'll be going to all the JW meetings but she's agreed not to try and "witness" to any of us or leave her organisation dogma around.

    I truly would like Stephanie and the rest of the family to be one again but I know it isn't going to be easy. She isn't prepared to listen to us slam the organisation so there isn't any point. I have 'Crisis of Conscience', but that'll have to be for another time. Stephanie is a very bright, intelligent girl who has decided to go to university to do teacher training. I know how she used to love archaeology - so I'm hopeful that, one day, she'll also read Carl Olof Jonsson's wonderful book 'The Gentile Times Reconsidered'. For now I walk with great trepidation.........

    Love,

    Ian

  • PaulJ
    PaulJ

    I hadnt read your story until now. Thanks for bringing it back to the top. PLeased to hear things are perhaps moving in the right direction with your family!

  • sonnyboy
    sonnyboy

    That was one of the most tragic stories I've heard on this forum. I hope everything comes together for you.

    My son stayed on the computer for around an hour, plus perused the printed-out information I had filed.

    Do you still know the location of the sites and printouts?

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Wow, that is such good news Ian.

    Sure, it will be a bit of a tightrope walk. You are not the only one that has to deal with that, mate.

    It is very nice when daughters come home to stay after they have been away for a while. I hope you get as much enjoyment as I did when that happened for us.

    Cheers

    Chris

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Hi Sonnyboy

    Do you still know the location of the sites and printouts?

    Unfortunately, so much is in the past now. I remember the following sites being of immense help: http://www.607v587.com/

    http://www.freeminds.org/

    Once I knew 607 BCE was baloney I knew the governing body was not whom it portrayed to be. Randy's site at Freeminds blew the cover on most of the other things. I also read The Gentile Times Reconsidered and Crises of Conscience. These re-enforced my decision to quit was the correct one.

    Ian

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