confliction
JoinedTopics Started by confliction
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11
How to write a letter of D/A... and what happens when I do?
by confliction infirst off, i'm almost definite somebody else has already posted, asked this question, but i'm too lazy to look right now lol.... about half a year of contemplation, evaluation, and calculation has led up to making this decision, so here it is.. .
because of a multitude of circumstances, i don't believe fading will be an option as i originally thought, and i frankly refuse to waste any more years of my life trying to pretend to believe something i clearly do not, and preserve a connection to people who don't even have the decency to speak to me or befriend me as a fellow human being.
i am alienated as it is- i guess i'm just a weird and shy person, and that will not change anytime soon.. i plan to - in the coming months when the time is right - present a letter of disassociation from the congregation, and the watchtower society.. .
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30
Dealing with the reality of death. How do you?
by confliction insince i've come to the realization and conclusion that i've been living a fictional lifestyle for the last 17 years, i've also come to identify with agnosticism.. .
but one issue that's been taking it's emotional toll on me lately is the realization of the fictitious paradisiac earth.. it was the ultimate goal as a witness- the answer to everything.
even if you had questions that couldn't be answered, you were to "wait until the paradise and ask" when you got there.. .
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21
Passion of the [Irony].
by confliction ini was just wondering.... why do we jw's make such a big deal about jesus dying on a pole, as opposed to a cross?.
the original word, albeit, can lean either way.
and seems in favor of a pole rather than a cross.
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10
What is it like to be an elder???
by confliction ini'm not 18 yet, so i've never had the chance to become one (thank god), but what kind of things do you learn as an elder that are... different from being a regular jw or basically someone without "priveleges"?.
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for example, what stuff do you hear, what books do you get, what kind of things did you see, etc..
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25
Preparing information about cults and mind control to a therapist...
by confliction ini'm currently visiting a psychologist/therapist to help me examine and work through my depression- i've had medical depression/anxiety all of my life.
i'm no longer anxious or excessively paranoid for the most part- that was a part of my younger childhood, probably from fears and nightmares of destruction at armageddon, and other childhood exaggerations and amplified fears.
but right now, she's treating me for a recent fall back into a depression.. anyways, for the most part, as you could guess, my depression stems from learning i have wasted my entire life (17 years) up to now in a cult, and pretty much my entire perceived world was nothing but an illusory concept.
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4
Regularity in meetings and study, and brainwashing.
by confliction inokay, so i was just doing some research on brainwashing and it's effects and how it's put into practice, and i thought this might be interesting to a few of you.. .
howstuffworks.com -> "how brainwashing works".
after that, i must listen to someone read from 1 kings again.
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24
Deprogramming... yourself.
by confliction inso, the title pretty much explains it.. .
i've come to a pretty definite conclusion for myself as to where i stand, and how i feel about the existence of a deity- let alone the idea that wts has divine backing.. .
my issue is that, being born in, i have lots of subconsciously ingrained phobias and behaviors burned in so deep, i constantly catch myself thinking and reatcting to things the "witness" way- things that don't apply to my life or the way i (want to) live my life anymore.. for example, because of the way i've been raised and indoctrinated, i've grown a serious aversion- you could say almost a literal fear- of worldy people; girls in particular.
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4
Had an interesting conversation with mom about shunning...
by confliction inso i was speaking about some "problems" and "confusion" i had about the wtbs, and while speaking the subject of shunning came up.. .
long story short, my mom said that if i were (theoretically) ever to leave,.
she would still speak to me and have me over and do all the normal things .
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9
A beginner's thanks...
by confliction ini know i only posted on the board 8 days ago- a little over a week.. at the beginning of this week, i went from hopeless and depressed, feeling like i had no way out.. .
but throughout the course of 8 days, i have been shown kindness that i haven't seen in years.. i have been reached out to in ways i didn't even know was possible.. in a little over 8 days, i went from feeling alone in a dark abyss of a world, to having an entire support group, that i know cares about me and understands me and exactly how i think and feel.. in one week, i have mustered up the courage to speak up to a friend who i have known for half my life, but was too afrait to tell about my doubts.. i have come to realize that, he, too is planning to leave this organization- never telling me because of fear i would reject him- and likewise for me.. i just wanted to notify all who have helped, that you will not be forgotten- i would have never imagined this much support when i first submitted my account information one month ago, unsure about my entire life.. .
i don't know how else to put this, so i will put it rather frankly:.
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10
Service is mathematically and logically pointless.
by confliction inso, i was thinking today about the point of service, other than the proclamations the king and his kingdom (bs :p ) and i kind of had an epiphany... but i'm sure somebody has already thought of this.
first, for people who never hear the 'truth', or never come to a true accurate understanding of it, they will most likely have odds in favor of them surviving into the paradise earth to get a second chance.
let's say the odds are 99% survival.. .