What is the most bizarre counsel you received as a JW, from a JW?

by Funchback 180 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • mynameislame

    When I was getting DFed a friend told me they are just men you need to play up how sorry you are.

    Another one, you shouldn't wear shorts at the KH even when you are there for a casual reason like meeting a group in the parking lot.

  • respectful_observer

    There was a couple in my congregation dating each other. They worked nearby one another, so would often meet for lunch.

    On multiple occasions they were pulled aside by the elders: "someone reported seeing you together at [restaurant] without a chaperone." or "Someone told us they saw you walking down the street together without a chaperone."

    As they were both in their late 20s and had dated others in the past, they both knew the "rules" and when they tried to explain that because they were in public there was no need for a chaperone. The elders' response was that that was technically the case but they should "give no cause for complaint" and "not be a cause for stumbling" in the congregation.

  • Jaidubdub

    when I first stopped going out on FS, I was asked by our (then) book study conductor why I hadn't reported my hours for the last few months. I told him it was because I didn't go out, hence no report. He told me that it wasn't too late for me to put in a report for last month, even if it's only 1 hour, and I can just make that time up this month. I told him that would be lying & Jeh hates liars, so I would rather not report than lie about it. He kind of blankly stared at me for a bit, then walked away. He never questioned me about my hours ever again & I have t gone out witnessing since....

  • Captain Schmideo2
    Captain Schmideo2
    I was told, as a child, not to watch Disney movies, because Disney "promotes evolution!"

    Not a personal counsel, but when the movie "Avatar" was playing and raking in ginormous cash at the box office, we had a CO admonish the congregation for watching that movie, because the name of the alien race "Na'vi" was similar to a demon from ancient times that was worshipped. Hoo, boy what a stretch.
    I could see why a Bible Thumping Christian might object to the themes of the movie, such as Animism, Nature Worship, Inter-Species Sex, etc, but really, finding some obscure link to a demon god no one ever heard of? Whatever.

  • truthseeker100

    I remember as a young man sitting in another witness young man's basement watching television and drinking a few beers when he pulled out a letter that he got that day from a young sister in another congregation. She was obviously very smitten with him and he was indifferent as to his attitude about her. So we decided to write her back and we made up a story about the various ordinary things we did and the things we were worried about and it was our intention to make us both look a bit weird.

    We told her how we were taking a correspondence course in taxidermy and that sometimes the formaldehyde got to us and caused us to pass out and not remember what had happened. Now I don't know if there is such a thing as a correspondence course in taxidermy but it sounded weird enough to us LOL. He joked in the letter about our many conversations with each other about our obsession with taxidermy and how sometimes some of the neighbouring animals seemed to go missing and how we suspected each other of stealing the animals stuffing and hiding them.

    He mailed the letter and about two weeks later we were both called into a council session with the elders about the dangers of drugs and inhalants and how they might cloud your judgement. They never indicated to us what it was that brought about the elder's wise council to us but we both knew. You just can't make stuff like that up LOL

  • _Morpheus
    Truthseeker, that story had me rotflmao!
  • Oubliette

    Truthseeker101, here is the truth you seek:

    American Taxidermy Online

    "Since 1975, The American Institute of Taxidermy has been proud to be the leader in taxidermy training. Now we would like to bring that training to the comfort of your own home by being the first to offer online classes. Starting in January 2008, we began offering Deer and Pheasant Mounting sessions. In August 2008 we expanded our offerings to include sessions in Coyote, Bass and Squirrel Mounting."


    "... I have thoroughly enjoyed this class and have learned a great deal. The video quality was more than I expected and more than explained any question I may have had. I look forward to starting my next class soon...."
    Eric from Pennsylvania
    student gamehead mount

    * * * * * * * * * * * *

    "... This is the greatest thing I have ever done and I love taxidermy. Can't wait to sign up for the next course."
    Kathy M

    * * * * * * * * * * * *
    "... The online course was far more detailed than anything I have seen before. I never had to guess at anything because nothing was missing. I look forward to taking the online bird class soon."
    Bob I.

    * * * * * * * * * * * *
    "... Enjoyed mounting these squirrels a lot and I can see that I did a better job on the second one than the first. I'm looking forward to my next class (coyote) and challenge."
    Jack from Indiana

    * * * * * * * * * * * *

    "... I couldn't be any happier with the online Turkey Flying class! It's so exciting telling people that I mounted it myself!"
    Judy C.

    * * * * * * * * * * * *

  • My Name is of No Consequence
    My Name is of No Consequence

    When I has a teenager, I was talking to this "worldly" girl. We weren't dating. It turned out that her mother worked with my uber dub elder uncle. When my uncle found out, he told my dad.

    A couple of years later, I was talking to another "worldly" girl. I was not dating her either. We just hung out a few times. Guess what? My uncle worked with her mother too and told on me again!

    Let's just say he is not my favorite uncle. Prick.

  • Driving Force
    Driving Force

    I am in Germany and was in a German speaking congregation.

    Well I was struck from the list of approved Watchtower readers after being an approved Watchtower reader for about 15 years. Just taken of the list, nobody talked to be about it. So of course I approached an Elder and asked why. Well he said, the society says that only good readers should be allowed to read the Watchtower in front of the congregation. So I am not a good reader I asked, well anyway the conversation went on and on and another elder joined in the discussion so I asked what criteria was set by the elders to decide who is a good reader and who is not. Of course they could not specify anything and the elders were very clearly uncomfortable with the conversation, but I pressed on and finally they gave the reason why I was no longer a Watchtower reader.

    The reason: "You have a British accent".

  • Driving Force
    Driving Force
    Believe you me racism is very much alive in German JW congregations.

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