NEW RELIGION! NEED INPUT!

by TR 140 Replies latest jw friends

  • Focus
    Focus

    What could I do?

    --
    Focus
    (Really Useful Class)

  • Focus
    Focus

    What could I do?

    --
    Focus
    (Really Useful Class)

  • TR
    TR

    Conflicted,

    You have some great ideas, so I'll put you in Simon's office. I believe Simon is in charge of the computer stuff.

    Focus,

    I'm creating a new department for you to head. You will be vice president in charge of Bullshi! Exposure. Your job description includes deciphering coded explanations by opposers that appear to be reasonable, but really are designed to flummox the rank and file.

    As Grand Poobah of "The Lost That Have Been Found", I consider the "bullshi! Exposure" department to be of utmost importance.

    Welcome to the team you guys!

    TR

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    You guys need a GOD for your new religion, don't you? I'll volunteer for that job. But I no longer do windows and I no longer do floors. I'll also need a curtain to hide behind and those thingy's that make big flames when people come into my sanctuary. No dogs will be allowed in my sanctuary.

    Farkel

  • Simon
    Simon

    no, no TR...no more being locked in a room with computers !
    I'm in charge of the wet T-shirt contest, sorry, I mean 'baptism'. Trust me, I'll bring cold water.
    - Simon (probably causing offence to women everywhere)

  • Scorpion
    Scorpion

    TR,

    With all this work going on people need a place to relax. I am asking for the position of DOAB. This is not what you are thinking (District Overseer Ass Bite).

    I wish to be Distributer Of Adult Beverages. Of course I will need a nice bar, you know, something like Judge Rutherford had at Bethsarim.

    BTW, if you make it to Reno or Tahoe let me know. My wife and I go to both places almost every year. It would be good to see you in person.

  • larc
    larc

    TR,

    I think that having Focus in charge of BS discovery is a good idea. I think he could accomplish another useful service. He could be the head of our Diplomatic Corps.

  • larc
    larc

    Farkel,

    Before you can be appointed God, we will have to check with our local Goddess, Red Horse Woman, to find out if this is acceptable to her. Stay in touch.

  • dark clouds
    dark clouds

    we need the antithesis of all the good our faith will represent, we need a challenger and opposer, we need that force that will bring on rain on baseball worship afternoons,
    we need a leader for our demons and she-devils, we need a bearer of false witness and director of false prophets. we need the scapegoat for our goddess' and god's mistakes (REDHORSE, FARKEL, i know you are infallible) .
    we that special someone to pass the buck to and say is responsible for all those things we chose to not accept responsability for, and that someone to accuse when our team falls in a slump.
    we need someone to sell our soul to, and we need the focus for our fear tactic indoctrination,
    I dark cloud will volunteer my services for such a duty and display this selflessness so as to blind you all to my existence, by such wit and charm my presence will go undetected, and i will be able to manipulate the games from deep down within my lair, swaying the outcomes, the odds of the spreads, even appointing the umpires and refs. i will forge a union with the governing body of our sect just to kep the balance of evil in check.
    if anyone has any other duties they feel i should cover just drop them by and i will see to it that temptation is sent your way, remember, now you will have me to blame.
    your lord of bondage and enslavement
    CHUCK

  • RedhorseWoman
    RedhorseWoman
    Before you can be appointed God, we will have to check with our local Goddess, Red Horse Woman, to find out if this is acceptable to her.

    This is ever so true, and I'm not sure that I need a consort at this point in time. However, Farkel, if you want to submit your resume (along with multitudinous gifts), I will be willing to check it over and get back to you.

    Suck-up time, Farkel-baby. (hehehehe)

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