Tonight I disassociated myself - after 24 years - had 2 hour meeting with Elder

Intel

I am now sitting at home. Alone. My wife left with my little child. My fault (I dislike the word "fault", but don't have a better one right now).

It feels strange, relieved and free, at the same time it was all very strange. I gave the letter to one of the local elders. Strange enough I was calm and serene to talk to him for about 2 hours about my developments, time at Bethel, how I became an Atheist. He was surprised, nonethelss talked calmly to me and asked many questions.

I never tought that it would be so easy, at the same time.....well....now the sh&% hit the fan! The family thing will (has) begun....I received emails, text messages, phone calls....I'm tired....I haven't answered to most of them. Only a very, very long email to a long time "friend"....(because I don't know if he will continue as my friend).

Well. I am not ready to "OUT" myself. Just needed to comunicate to somebody. This took huge balls of steel, because of my long term history and life connections.....all gone now. I will need to fill the gap.........

Thanks for your help and words!!!! After THAT conversation I'm officially an Apostate .....

stillin

be strong.

NewChapter

Hang in there Intel. Time will keep marching and you'll love your freedom even more. I think it must be shocking to realize you are cut off suddenly from the people that formed a large part of your world. With the knowledge that you will never go back, you don't have that temporary feeling you'd get if you planned to be reinstated. Did your wife know your plans? How will things go with her?

So far, you are much braver than me. I wrote the letter but never turned it over. I'm still attempting to stay under the radar, but there are days I think that's much harder than just telling them to fly away. But I don't have any family in, so it's much different for me.

Take Care,

NC

EntirelyPossible

sucks bro. you will get to see your kids. that's the most important things. all else is ... a distraction.

Intel

Thanks! My family: all in. ALL (down to cousins). My wife: in. I don't know how things will go....she knew that I was pretending and we had lots and lots of fights over the past years....she didn't knew that I was going to do it this week and that I would actually go ahead.

I didn't have the courage....postponed the decision for 5 long, difficult years.....

moshe

Good luck, Intel. Now you can live the life you were meant to live, while the rest of the faders have to live the life of a doormat. I always believe the honest road is the best one you can take in life.

serenitynow!

My wife left with my little child

Do you mean she left you?? If so, I am so sorry. I just do not understand throwing away a marriage over difference in religious beliefs.

jwfacts

I am sorry to hear of the tough time you are going through. It is the best thing though, you really needed to finally take this step and get on with your life. Living life as a lie would have made you ever more depressed. It will take time but you will be amazed at how life opens up to you and the relief you will feel at finally being free from the oppression of that religion.

The biggest loss will be not living with your daughter, so I hope you are able to arrange for fair access rights. If your wife has a change of heart and wants to come back, do you want to continue living with her, or was it time to end the marriage as well?

cofty

Its probably difficult to know how to feel right now. You're free but the cost has been huge. I wish you all the very best in moving on with a new life.

What about your contact with your child, are you going to be able to work that out?

scooterspank

Oh Intel. I had no idea. I just replied to your post on my thread. I admire your bravery. You do have b**** of steel. I hope things go well for you. Keep us posted! Cheers to your new found freedom.

Tonight I disassociated myself - after 24 years - had 2 hour meeting with Elder

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