Tonight I disassociated myself - after 24 years - had 2 hour meeting with Elder

by Intel 109 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  BluesBrother

  Itel....my sincere condolences for your sad situation, and I salute your courage in standing up for what is right.

  I honestly believe , however, that elders in the USA (I assume you are there) have a different attitude than their counterparts in the U K .

  For one thing, we have associated with more than one cong since I became "inactive" - I have discussed my "problems with the beliefs" with elders and they have never taken action against me. I attend sometimes with my wife and have a friendly relationship with them all.

  My wife is also 110% J W, but knows better than to open up about me in company of "her Bros" . So I am ignored - no pressure.(So far at any rate!)

  In my elder days there would have been no thought of a sister leaving her husband because he d/a'd..That is in direct contradiction of 1 Cor 7 .13..and The Society's literature. As I understand it, separation may be considered only in cases where the "sister" is subject to extreme physical or mental abuse.

  So, I don't doubt you in any way.. I have read other similar accounts on this board..but I do not understand it.

  BTW , my attitude is - If they want me out they will have to drag me to a J C Meeting or two, and then an appeal . I will tie up as much of their time as I can
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  PSacramento

  I don't knwo what to say Intel.

  With all honesty.

  I can't even fathom not being able to see my children for 4 days....

  We must follow our heart and do was is best for ALL those in our lives and I am sure that, IF you can get through to your wife that it will be best for ALL.

  Didn't she know you were having these issues?
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  juni

  You took the first step Intel in the right direction.

  It WILL BE HARD finding your equilibrium after the euphoric feeling wears off of giving them the so called, f*** off.

  If you can, I would advise talking to a professional counselor, preferably one who is familiar with cult indoctrination. Be kind to yourself as you ride the waves of emotions after leaving. Find something you enjoy doing - volunteer, hobbies, etc. to stay positive. And find strength from talking to others who support your decision. Stay active - exercise (walking, biking, swimming) is a proven depression fighter.

  This forum has helped many after they have made their decision to leave because there is validation to your feelings and expressions. I wish you the best!

  Juni
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  out4good3

  His wife is going to have to come to the conclusion, on her own, that he's not some fire breathing devil worshipper ready to eat their kids.

  I wouldn't let it go on to long though as you kow how those JWs like to fill in the blanks with all those WT reasonings and place blame on you for not following WT directives.

  Don't give in to the emotional blackmail that is coming on strong.
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  Nickolas

  You have the courage of your convictions and have become an honest man. Congratulations. Steel yourself against what is to come, as many of those above advise. It is going to be tough, but it is going to be what shapes you for the rest of your life and you are about to become a better man. If the respect these people have for you is conditional on you being a JW, then they will have no respect for you until you fold your tent and come home to them. That's not going to happen if you want to stay an honest man. Your former JW friends and family are holding your life out at ransom and they are not bluffing when they tell you they will not be the ones to blink first. They have no respect for you so you should reciprocate. Take charge. It's tough for a dad to get custody of the kids but not unprecedented. Do what you need to do discretely then get custody of your daughter, move away and start a new life.
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  nugget

  I would remind your wife that you spent 5 years trying to do things her way she has spent no time or effort trying to compromise with your way. It is not you keeping away from your child but her keeping your daughter from you. You didn't walk out of the relationship she did. You are not being egotistical rather have the humility to admit you made a mistake and that the religion you followed was wrong.

  JWs do not compromise and never reach out it is discipline, pain and guilt but they will never see it for themselves which is truly sad.
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  Bella15

  Many that leave the WT teachings become Atheist - it happened to me too, I think it was my way to cope with the WT teaching that God is only for JWs ... I didn't know another god but the Watchtower's god; but thanks to the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob the True God of the Bible, I received by mistake some Joel Osteen's CDs. Looking backwards I was like a cat just peeking through the corner - in my case, listening to Joel Osteen talking about this God from the bible - so AWESOME, so LOVING, so full of plans not to harm me but to give me a future ... after finding out first hand about the sexual abuse coverage going on in that religion, I went to buy a bible, started reading and there I found GOD ALMIGHTY loving me, there I found JESUS, giving his life for me, his blood covering my sins, his unconditional love for me, after 35 years it was like reading the bible for the first time. Finally, after years of feeling so miserable due to my upbringing in that religion, I am truly happy. I found the way, I found JESUS!
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  J. Hofer
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  Nickolas

  ... talking about this God from the bible - so AWESOME, so LOVING, so full of plans not to harm me but to give me a future

  Sounds like your bible is better than my bible. That's not how the god in my bible comes across to me at all.
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  J. Hofer

  if joel osteen says so, it must be right.