Your best one sentence JW comeback contest

by moshe 160 Replies latest jw friends

  • Ex-Dub MS
    Ex-Dub MS

    Me: Knock knock.

    JW: Who's there?

    Me: YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!

    The End.

  • william hahn
    william hahn

    "I'm sorry i have my own religion....and it takes all my time to organize so i really cant consider taking on a second!'

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    "We are having more Earthquakes today then ever" says JW

    Response: "No, in looking at historical data by the US Geological Survey since 1900, the frequency and intensity are about stable over the years. It's that our communication system & 24 hour news makes everything seem more frequent and intense. Look at http://earthquake.usgs.gov/research/data/centennial.pdf Plus, we now have more monitors in more places accross the globe."

  • designs
    designs

    Householder 'Did you come here to convert me'

    JW 'No'

    Householder 'LIAR"

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    Hah! Designs, that's a good one, but I think I'd answer like this:

    Zid to JW at door: "Did you come here to convert me?"

    JW: "No..." [Poor JW! Having to deal with ME at the door...]

    Zid: "Good!" [shuts door!!]

    Well, I am a She-Devil, after all...

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    caliber,

    You said:

    : Don't you find it strange to think that God's grace is as small as just one religion... limited to less than one percent of the world

    Uh, it is TEN times less than one percent. According to Fred Franz in one Watchtower article that is available to see in a million websites, he said 99.9% of humanity will be killed by the Watchtower god.

    I will re-post that quote if you wish. It's amazing how Watchtower God will reward 1/10th of one percent of all living people, the majority of whom are lying crackpots with a 100% track record of prophetic failure and whose doctrines change as fast as the wind blows and then massacre billions and billions of decent, law-abiding people who never claim to speak for God and blaspheme God by pretending to speak for Him, unlike the Watchtower morons who falsely make predictions in God's name and THEN deny they did anything wrong when their false predictions fail.

    Strange.

    Farkel

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    godrutz,

    : I am not aware of the problem. If there is, does that negate the historicity of the rest of the Bible that Jesus affirmed (Noah, etc.)?

    You are an idiot to claim that the Noachian flood has ANY historicty just because the followers of Jesus who allegedly wrote about what Jesus allegedly said FORTY to FIFTY years after he allegedly said it.

    That kind of "evidence" wouldn't even get a parking ticket dismissed, let alone be evidence for a human to make life choices based upon it.

    Farkel, Good Tooth Fairy CLASS

  • godrulz
    godrulz

    You underestimate the ability of God to inspire an accurate recording of history. The Noahic Flood fits catastrophism vs uniformitarianism. A Global Flood fits secular and religious evidence.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep
    A Global Flood fits secular and religious evidence

    Yeah, right.

    Tuataras and kiwis flew to New Zealand after the flood.....

    ...and your version of god is going to burn my butt in hell forever because I see you as being a nutter?

  • sizemik
    sizemik
    A Global Flood fits secular and religious evidence.

    Yeah . . . the rantings of "creation scientists" (doctorates and all) who make up less than 1% of qualified scientists, among whom they have zero credibility. I've read their assertions . . . they're laughable to the point of tears!

    And a small representative of Fundamentalist mind-numbed Christians who think the Bible is infallible and literal.

    Great collection of evidence! . . . I've got more respect for the members of the flat earth society.

    That's my 3 sentence comeback to that tripe!

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