Your best one sentence JW comeback contest

by moshe 160 Replies latest jw friends

  • WontLeave

    If you never want to see them again, the best response I've found is "I'd love to study the Bible with you, but I refuse to read any church literature." I've accepted 3 Bible studies so far, and they don't come back. Their motivation is obvious, since their "We're just out encouraging Bible reading" is exposed as a lie. "We're preaching the Kingdom of God" is exposed as a lie. When you call all their bluffs, all they're left with is the bare truth that JWs are trying to put numbers on a sheet to impress the few men who will actually see it. Sadly, the only man who will have any idea who they are is the congregation secretary; beyond that, every publisher is just a number. One of the cells on their monthly timesheet is "placements" and another number is "Bible studies", which are only counted if they're using Watchtower literature. Once again, JWs confuse God's Word with the insane and inane rantings of men.

  • Hortensia

    interesting discussion -- I have to admit I like to jerk their chains. I said to some JWs once, "we were told in the 1970s the preaching work was almost over. When's that going to happen?" and I have asked them, "millions now living will never die -- when's that going to happen?" They aren't able to answer back, because there is no answer.

  • Terra Incognita
    Terra Incognita

    Write this down and hand it over to them. Then close the door nicely.

    Please Google; "Me cago en el coño de tu madre".

  • godrulz

    D: Epicurus' trilemma from B.C. (your BCE) has been adequately answered by Alvin Platinga's free will defense, etc. Get with the program. There are answers to your concerns/questions.

  • moshe

    Godrulz- this a a JW comeback thread.

    Adequately? Depends which side of the argument you are on.

    The Bible gives a tally of 2,476,633 as the number of humans that Biblegod has killed and Satan kill number is 10 - and we aren't counting the untold numbers of men, women and children killed in the Flood of Noah. It could be argued that humans are morally superior to Biblegod, but that is another topic- if you choose to pursue it.

  • d

    I wonder how the witness's would react to this

  • satinka
    "Why is reading "Crisis of Conscience" considered by the Watchtower Society to be as bad as molesting a child?"

    Actually, some have been disfellowshipped for "illegal" reading, but others did NOT get disfellowshipped for molesting a child.

    Ray Franz got disfellowshipped for having a MEAL with an "Apostate TM "


  • Tuesday

    "So what religion were you before you became a witness?"
    "I was a catholic"
    "So you didn't read the bible before you studied with the Witnesses."
    "Not really"
    "Of course, you're Catholic you don't have to."
    "So the first time you actually sat down and read the bible in any way was with the Witnesses"
    "So why would I be shocked whatsoever with the fact that the first person who reads the bible with you, sits and explains it with their point of view and it makes perfect sense to you? You had nothing to compare it to, of course it's going to seem right."

  • GOrwell

    They don't even 'read' the bible; they pick out 30 proof text's and call it a day. I have yet to find a JW who has read the Bible while being a JW (myself included).

  • WontLeave

    JW converts haven't changed. They didn't have any reason to believe what they did in their last religion, except the pastor/priest/mullah told them to. Now, they have no reason to believe JW doctrine except the Society has told them to. They don't care what's in the Bible and they don't think anyone else does, either. So, they shove Watchtowers at people and can't fathom why doors are being slammed in their faces.

    I've never had a door slammed in my face. I was yelled at once by a guy who was pissed at the last JW, but we ended up parting as friends. Next time we went, he took a book. I started Bible studies (real Bible studies) left and right, much to the chagrin of the pioneers who were utter failures. I often tried to explain that nobody cares what's in the Watchtower and neither should they, but all that did was get me into trouble.

    Just like JWs believe themselves to be Bible scholars, because they can show apathetic churchgoers Bible verses they've never seen, the average JW can be shown things in the Bible they've never seen. They go from one apathetic rut to another and just change the men who tell them what to believe.

    You'd think they would have the attitude of "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." But they don't. Drifting along in a church just because you were born into it is a symptom of a much greater fundamental character flaw. Transplanting that person into another religion doesn't change who they are. In fact, bombard them constantly with man-made doctrine instead of just an occasional Sunday sermon and they become dogmatic douchebags, parroting what the magazines and elders tell them. Now, they really fancy themselves Bible scholars, even though they still haven't read the book.

    I've many times asked JWs - especially pioneers - "How can you go to someone's door and offer to explain a book to them you've never read?" The most honest responses I've gotten have indicated something profound to me that I don't believe most JWs consciously perceive: JWs aren't the preachers; the Society is. We're just supposed to be pack mules for their message. If we attempt to understand anything and preach that, we'll be labeled "apostates" and thrown out. We're not supposed to preach, or teach, or learn, or understand. We're supposed to be an extension of the Society. Odd; I thought they were "the slave".

    We don't have to read the Bible, because the Society does that for us. Just like the Medieval Catholic Church, the JWs don't believe we have a right to the Bible. They've come right out and said it's their book. It's an "organizational book", it's "written to the faithful and discreet slave", "only to them is it not sealed", etc. Basically, they feel we have no right reading the Bible with the aim of understanding it. We're just supposed to memorized some 'proof texts' and take their word for what the rest says. They are our Magisterium.

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