Softly, softly catch your monkey!
Well done SIAM, and yes this is inspirational to others who are in your situation you found yourself 2 years ago (as was I just 4 years ago).
Progress ( I think? ) in helping my wife to see the "truth"
by stuckinamovement 93 Replies latest members private
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breakfast of champions
Thanks for the update
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RayPublisher
I love this thread... And you too Mr. and Mrs. SIAM!
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stuckinamovement
Hi y'all
a brief update. The lovely mrs. Siam has come a long way. Last night we sat on the couch and watched the Steve Hassan interview of Roberto. She has asked me to post things here and there on this site and has told me that she will make her final decision to stay or go after the annual meeting. When I asked her what she expected to hear she said, "a bunch of crap" Btw, she still attends about 50% of the meetings by turning her mind off and ignoring the problem. She told me though that it is an unsustainable situation. The end is close.
3 years ago I was an elder who expressed his doubts to his wife. I told her that my conscience would not allow me to serve and to her credit she supported my resignation. When I specifically would show her things about the organization she would get very angry and scream that I was destroying the family. There were many tears shed on both our parts as we realized we were going separate directions. The thing that helped though was she saw how genuinely destroyed I was when I learned ttatt. Seeing that I was broken made her realize that something broke me and the things I told her were true.
Time went on and soon she supported my cessation of service due to my conscience. I continued to read the bible with my wife and made an effort to contrast both the contradictions with the orgs doctrine and the contradictions within the scriptures themselves. We have had several shepherding calls since my resignation and subsequent inactivity and she has sat by my side and on her own told the elders that I am burned out and just need a break.
Through patience we have come to a place where we are both exiting. She knows ttatt. She has asked me to send letters to the media about the molestation issues within the org even though she knows it is likely that I will be df'ed. I will sit next to her and read her snippets of crisis of conscience and isocf. She has seen text message chains between myself and some other people on this board and I have let her read them. "Surprisingly" none were complimentary of the org.
so the message I have for those who have mates still in. Be patient. Don't give up. Show your loved one little bits of information at a time (preferably craziness from the society or news articles). Leaving the cult no matter how you do it will damage you. We were all stuck in a cult that stole our minds. You can't help a person think for themself in an instant when they have been taught that there is no need to think at all. The trick is plant seeds, and then let them grow. If you are still in and need an opportunity please use the upcoming batshit crazy watchtower article on the fds. It is a bag of seed with the fds stamp on it.
Thanks to all here who have helped with advice and good wishes. It has meant a lot. I sincerely would not have been able to get to where I am without the intelligent posts, timely news and encouragement received from this board.
siam
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problemaddict
My wife is in. She sees the strings but still likes the puppet show. So I am working on it. These stories give me hope.
Thank you for sharing and continuing to contribute to the community.
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DesirousOfChange
The thing that helped though was she saw how genuinely destroyed I was when I learned ttatt.
SIAM-- that is a key factor.
Usually when a person is trying to get a loved one "out", it is not a selfish motive. If they thought it was better for their loved to remain "in", likely they would let them be. Many have said that it is better for their elderly parents to remain "in" and have their old friends and support network that is there within the Congregation.
But it is the sincere hurt, sorrow, pain that comes upon most who learn TTATT that seems to touch so many spouses/children/friends. I know I am crushed. My anger is from my pain; my sorry; my feelings of being deceived. My wife sensed all of that too.
Doc
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cantleave
Nice one. It seems you will be be free soon.
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Frazzled UBM
You are an inspiration! Thanks