by silentlambs 104 Replies latest jw friends

  • zerubberballs

    Geez Larc,

    Is this a never ending thread or not. (my first reaction is .. sheesh, who gives a **** about my opinion anyway? i was just stating my view .. does it need going over with a fine toothed comb?)

    I did not understand your last sentence. You said that "It offends me that sometimes I believe that it is done unnecessarily and other times because of the fact that it is necessary." Are you saying that you are offended both because it is necessary and also because it it unnecessary? Why are you offended because "sometimes" you may feel it is unnecessary. How can you judge that, and what difference does it make to the narrative? Anyone can lie, with our without names and no one else would be the wiser, now would they?

    I could make up a story about Gilbert Gnarley, Earl Pitts, Gary Burbank, and Mr. Dirk. No one on this board, except for JAVA would know who these people are. Are they real or fictional, and how would you ever find out? I think your whole deal is a tempest in a teapot.

    Yeah, this particular little point is less than a storm in a tea cup. It's just my personal beef when i see people posting a story without including the real names of the characters involved.

    Even when i was an active JW I named names and rarely held back the truth if i saw an Elder involved in wrongdoing. What'd be the point in that, apart from butt crawling your way to Eldership? My thing is that if you're right and tell the truth you have nothing to fear from anybody (I don't deny the inherant neivety in that nor am i imposing it on anyone else .. it's just my personal attitude. When I read a story with fictional names my interest wains by 50% or more. I've never been one for fiction except at the movies or theatre)

    When you say: "I think your whole deal is a storm in a tea cup, are you talking about this point Prisca has chosen to highlight or my advice to Silentlambs? If you are calling my whole 'deal' in this thread aof little consequence you haven't been awake the last couple of days or I take it you have some better formula for helping prevent the episode we've just witnesses between silentlambs, his 'victim' and MA?


    PS: This thread has become boring as rats piss, you'll get no argument from me on that. (and i have a truck to catch thank god :)

  • larc


    I find a strange contradiction that Prisca pointed out and you admitted to. You do not feel comfortable revealing personal facts about your situation and you acknowledge that some others can't either, yet you are "offended" because some unknown number of people choose to keep anonimaty (sp) when in fact it is your judgement that they shouldn't.

    Hey Brucie, I would post my name, address and phone number right here in public, if it wasn't for my wife's reservations about it. Now, do I offend you because I honor my wife's wishes, or do you think I am some kind of fake and I am making this up?

  • larc

    Tell you what bunkie,

    I will list the names of all the elders in my congregation, if you do the same. Fair enough?

  • DazedAndConfused

    I think that I need to clarify what I meant in my earlier post as it seems that I digressed from my initial feelings and it was construed otherwise.

    What I have a problem with is making post's that state a specific persons online name and then bashing how they feel. As in this post named: Regarding MAD APOSTATE

    Of course we are all going to look at it and take one side or the other. As I said in one of my first posts on this thread we need to take this to a personal level...........please don't bash in public before all sides are looked at. And I feel that the best way to hash things out so to speak is to deal one on one.

    I have no idea what has happened in the past few months in here but it seems to me that there are a few problems that we as adults need to consider. I will make a short list:

    1) We are adults and we can agree to disagree without putting shame upon another persons name.

    2) Accept the fact that without inflection (only available through one on one, eye to eye contact) we can only take what we read as what we perceive it to be. However...........what I have proposed, a getting together one on one (in email preferably) may aleviate a lot of this foolishness.

    3) Why would anyone want to take personal "infighting" public unless they want to humiliate the other person?

    Can't we at least show a front of a some what unified affiliation by taking matters to a personal level rather than making a personal look or feel like a total ass without even trying to see what the other person is really feeling?

  • Pathofthorns


    Thanks for your response.

    I still see it as possibly a dangerous decision for someone to post here who is in the innitial stages of coming to terms with being molested considering the volatile and unpredictable nature of this place.

    I also see the WT as only a piece of the problem in this matter. No matter how their policies change for the better, it won't change what happened to an individual, it won't guarantee a conviction to protect an individual and some individuals might still fail to seek out the help they need.

    At the same time, if the WT can make changes to better protect individuals, as well as to better help victims of molestation, then they should do so.

    I just find that there is so much focus on the WT making changes, that it could be sidetracking what is IMO a greater issue of getting victims back on their feet again by seeing they get proper help instead of using them as pawns to force change on the WT.

    You mention that most cannot afford the needed therapy. This makes much sense, but surely in America there must be some sort of assistance available to victims of abuse. If not, then is the WT has someone else to share the blame with, do they not?

    If there is a genuine lack of access to qualified help in America for those who cannot afford it, then would that be justification enough to seek unqualified help that could offer potentially dangerous advice? These options are really lousy.

    You also mention that many molesters are the child's father, and I would assume most are a relative of some sort. The social dynamics of a family, not just a JW family might also be a hinderance to an individual seeking help. This also is a factor in addition to the WT, which prevents individuals from seeking help.

    In order to protect innocent people from paying for crimes they didn't commit, an individual will somehow have to prove they were molested. Without other individuals coming forward that have been molested by the same individual, I would think this difficult to prove.

    I think the legal system faces many of the same challenges as the WT in this regard. How many police officers and lawyers know that they stand little chance of getting a conviction when only one victim has come forward? The whole matter is incredibly frustrating.

    The more I think about this, the more I appreciate what a horrible crime this is. The ultimate sadness is that such things happened in the first place. While some changes might soften the pain somewhat, IMO nothing will ever take it away.


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