**** Some people don't teach their children manners. Grrr. ****

by FlyingHighNow 277 Replies latest jw friends

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  FlyingHighNow

  I kissed my wife today (lots of it), we have nothing to make up for. We love each other.

  Very wonderful. And the guy with the kid and the lottery ticket. Yikes.
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  Kudra

  This thread is classic internet.
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  FlyingHighNow

  Classic human.
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  Scully

  FlyingHigh&Mighty writes:

  I can't force the woman to teach her children good manners. I said what I did about giving up chairs to adults because I strongly feel that any healthy child needs to know this. If the parents aren't going to teach their children this common courtesy, then others will. Teachers, etc. And even people at the library.

  Again, you are assuming to know that which you do not know. For all you know, those kids may be autistic or have some other developmental disability whereby their mother wanted them where she wanted them. It is not your call to make. If you want to continue to arrogantly assume and remain ignorant and feel entitled to respect and comfy couch seating, when I'm sure there were other places besides the kiddy section for you to park yourself, you will continue to be disappointed in peoples' 'lack of manners' and unhappy with people around you. Perhaps they don't even own a comfy couch like the one at the library, and this is the only place they can enjoy one... did that ever cross your mind?
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  Big Tex

  Maybe we should ask Miss Manners.

  http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/linkset/2005/03/25/LI2005032501837.html
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  FlyingHighNow

  did that ever cross your mind?

  Scully, you've already said this is a sore spot with you because of your experience in line at the store. I get it.
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  beksbks

  I hold the door open for everyone. I give up my seat to anyone who looks like they need it. Able bodied and exhausted, elderly, with babby.......................etc. I say thank you, and your welcome at every opportunity. I give a nod or wave when someone let's me in traffic. I do not interrupt the clerk and wave my arms at them or start talking to them when they have another customer (I used to get this all the time at the Library, and it drives me nuts). I agree that cultures are different, and what is considered rude in one place may not be in another. I have also been front row center for observations on other cultures and their assimilation into ours. I have known many "ugly Americans" who are so inflexible and unfeeling about the differences in culture, that they were the rude ones. By the same token, I say we do a disservice to all, not to expect a certain level of manners.
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  FlyingHighNow

  Thanks, Tex.

  Here is something by Miss Manners on the subject: I am high lighting it in pink because the quote feature bunches it up.

  .

  Miss Manners' Guide to Rearing Perfect Children". She writes:

  It is reasonable and wise to require children to address adults with the
  appropriate formality of family title ("Aunt Candy") or civilian rank and
  surname ("Mrs. Heppzapittle"); to expect them to rise when adults
  appear; to refrain from beating them to a seat on the bus and to
  surrender one when in possession; to answer their questions and
  remarks civilly, even if they are silly or repetitive; to restrain themselves
  from inappropriately pointing out their errors and from analyzing what
  powers could produce such errors; and so on.
• 

  Scully

  Consider the source: http://www.fix.net/~rprewett/respect.html

  and why would you leave out this part?

  I would add to that list another item: children and young people should show, by word
  and demeanor, that they recognize that many adults, by virtue of their greater life
  experience, have acquired a greater level of wisdom and maturity. An unteachable,
  know-it-all attitude is rude at any age.

  However, Miss Manners also writes:

  It is neither wise nor reasonable to expect children to think that adults
  are, by definition, smart, right, or admirable. Such an attempt will quickly
  lead a child of even average powers of observation to the conclusion
  that at least one adult, the one who makes this claim, is either dim-witted
  or mendacious...A child who is never allowed to betray the belief that any
  adult has done anything wrong is one who will quickly lose interest in the
  idea of being among such deluded fools.

  It is up to us as parents to consider exactly what social conventions we will require of
  our children in regards to their interactions with adults.
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  I looked for Miss Manners take on the subject of giving up seats. I don't advocate that all adults deserve to have their views respected by all children. But I do believe children should show politeness and relative respect and good manners. I also believe that ideally, parents should teach their children, this respect. My mother might have thought my neighbor across the street was unfair and nosy. But she would have expected us to treat her politely under normal circumstances.

  From your quote:

  I would add to that list another item: children and young people should show, by word
  and demeanor, that they recognize that many adults, by virtue of their greater life
  experience, have acquired a greater level of wisdom and maturity. An unteachable,
  know-it-all attitude is rude at any age.