by shell69 87 Replies latest jw friends
There is a hell and I dont think you want to go there.
What if you're wrong about that? All that anxiety in the one real life you know for sure about...for nothing.
If God is the compassionate creature we are taught about, then the only thing He can ever expect of us is that we live our life authentically, honest and committed to the truth as we perceive it.
Nothing more is possible. Nothing more is needed. Everything else is cynical hypocrisy.
I'm totally honest with my children.
I'm an alcohol addict.
I hate it, and I really want/need to stop. Its just not that easy. If it was I'd have done it.
So these terrible black moods I get... i then mask to unconsiousness with drink, and i cant go on like this any more. I want it to stop, but I'm scared that all my life will be filled with my fight against the drink, that all anyone can see is 'alcoholic' tattoo'd accross my forhead, and thats all my children can see.
(((((shell))))))
(((((((SHELL))))))))
i really hate this thing inside myself like you wouldn't believe it.
i really hate this thing inside myself like you wouldn't believe it.
I'm sorry about that. Does alcohol make it go away?
QL
it makes evenings bearable, so I don't have to look at my kids and think what I AM and what I may be responsible for.
QL
it makes evenings bearable, so I don't have to look at my kids and think what I AM and what I may be responsible for.
from my own experience of it guilt is a vicious circle
when you say "what you are responsible for" do you mean for taking your children away from JWs?
It is possible to win the battle against alcohol. I know people who have. I hear people say how they don't think about drinking anymore.
So don't see it as an impossible thing. Don't imagine that you'll stop drinking and ALWAYS be miserable.
Biggest step you can make now is seek help from others and don't beat yourself up - because its a long path but a path that you can take and you can win.
Hugs
Sirona
And what if I'm wrong?
Wrong about the dubs?
How could you possibly be wrong?
