by minimus 105 Replies latest jw friends
I was counseled by a fellow elder to not walk so fast from house to house. He taught me the "pioneer shuffle". We coul've been done a street in 20 mins. but it took nearly an hour.
I got the same counsel. I used to think it was an "urgent work" we were engaged in because "times were critical". I guess I was wrong. The only time we showed any sense of urgency was when it was time to go to Tim Hortons.
W
Seating Rules:
Sit to the front of the hall.
A brother and sister cannot sit next to each other unless they intend marriage.
Men and women cannot be friends.
"Don't save for retirement...Don't pursue a career...don't love anyone not a JW"
Most Jehovah's Witnesses save for retirement, I know quite a number of Jehovah's Witneses that are in professional careers...including myself and my family. One of the main qualities Jehovah's witnesses show is "love for their neighbor".
I have been a baptized witness of Jehovah for over 15 years, I work as a Insurance Claims Adjuster, and attending Law School part time. My mother is a General Practitioner (MD), and my father is not a witness. -He does not have any college education (self employed) My older brother is a manager of a Electrical supply store (bachelor degree) and my younger brother is attending Law School full time. We are not looked down at in the congregation. It's when you put schooling or work 1st place in your life instead of God...that's when it not a positive thing. Alot of the "unwritten rules" are not rules at all. It's common sense. If your unsure regarding something you heard about JW...ask one. =P
I was counseled once for sitting in a row of seats by myself.We were told to sit in the middle rows sitting next to someone or near someone.I was counseled once for not having a service bag.I would carry the books in my hand.2 elders told me that we don't carry our books that way.
I was counseled once for not carrying all the books in my Service bag even if we didn't need them that day.One elder even lifted my Service bag once to see if I was carrying books in my bag.I would carry just the Watchtower Magazine,Bible,and Song Book on Sunday's.
Damn that is funny..
That's actually not true. I've never heard of that, and whoever answers with the right answer...answers with the right answer, regardless of age, sex,etc...
If you are at a sporting event and they start to play the National Anthem, dont stand up. If you are already up and they start it...you can remain standing but dont participate. Making eye contact with the flag may constitute spiritual fornication.
If somebody prays at a gathering who isnt a JW. Dont say Amen because they are praying to Satan their God.
If you have turkey, gravy, cranberry sauce and stuffing on the third Thursday in November...do not call it Thanksgiving. Make sure everybody you are snubbing in your family on that day knows that you "Thank Jehovah Every Day and Dont Need a Special Day to Thank Him."
If you have a "costume party" in October for your JW children you can do it even on October 30th or November 1st as long as you dont do it on October 31st which would be pagan and satanic.
Playing Dungeons and Dragons caused the players to become murderers. A good JW would not play Dungeons and Dragons.
When cleaning the Kingdom Hall, the women clean the urinals and the toilets, the men supervise the women.
People with low service hours are not allowed to participate in Quick Builds because they arent deserving of getting their fingers smashed with hammers and getting insulation all over their clothes like the spiritual ones are.
The wife of the elder who has been in the congregation longer than anybody else gets to pick the colors of the walls and upholstery for the remodel no matter how garish it looks. She also gets to pick the incredibly fake looking silk flower arrangement by the sound system booth and the nasty strawberry scented air freshener in the mothers room.
Tell the people who gave the talks on the School that they were encouraging, uplifting, upbuilding and that you never once heard them pop their P's, even if your two year old could have done a better job.
All pregnant sister's bellies CAN and SHOULD be patted by everyone they come close to because that baby dublette she is carrying is community property and she cannot protest being fondled, and she must say "why thank you!" to sisters who call attention to how big her boobs are getting, and how much her ankles have swelled.
It is perfectly alright to ask someone with 12 children why they arent out in field service more often. It's considered encouragement. But you are not obliged to ask them to come to your home for dinner because who would want their 12 brats destroying the house, and she shouldnt have been having all those kids in this time of the end anyway so its her own fault she has no friends.
oh....god now you got me started LOL!!
That's actually not true.
It most certainly is true. My ex-wife once made a comment that contradicted an incorrect comment made by an elder. I was counseled by the elders to instruct my wife to stop trying to "teach in the congregation". They said the correction should have either been made by a brother or not at all.
W
That's actually not true. I've never heard of that, and whoever answers with the right answer...answers with the right answer, regardless of age, sex,etc... Yes this is a rule. As I recall this is in the Elders Manual as well. That if a person, sister or brother, answers a question incorrectly, the elder in charge of the study MUST call on a brother to give the correct answer, and will continue to call on brothers until he gets the correct answer or will use the outline he has with the "suggested" correct response on it to insure that the question is covered and answered per WT standards.
I don't know if to laugh or cry at this thread.
Actually, it is making me feel kind of sick...like I've "returned to the vomit".
So glad to be out!
***you could go on and on, but your still wrong. Either your ignorant, or you just enjoy making things up...but it doesn't matter, whatever makes you feel smarter is all that counts, right?
-SeanGuy
