by Sassy 92 Replies latest members private
it just goes to show how much you have changed in the past year..we'll probably be talking to HR on this, if not gone away.
Sounds like she is threatening to give you a bad review because you have "changed". I would definatley take the messege to HR. You must protect yourself. If nothing else it might help you get moved to a different position.
So she's conducting herself inappropriately, unethically, unprofessionally and illegally, yet somehow she's able to rationalize that it's YOU jeopardizing her job and livelihood?? Give me a break!!
Thanks Scully, yeah, that was what I was thinking. and I did hear that right didn't I? that she was accusing me of jeapardising her job? But it was HER that scheduled this meeting.. Her that gave me this ultimatum to turn myself into the elders.. but "I" was jeapardising her job??
I bet it was her elder hubby that gave her the idea that you were a "chicken". I mean... HOW DARE YOU use HR laws to prevent workplace harassment to get her to keep her nose out of your personal affairs. Again... Give me a break!! The Watchtower Society or JWs would NEVER use the laws of the land for their own advantage, now would they??? And if you had simply just done as she suggest "come to me and tell me you didn't appreciate talking about those kinds of things at work" she would have taken it as a clear signal to go ahead and talk to the PO.
The funny things is I asked her what that meeting was about? asked her if I should be concerned and she refused to even tell me what the meeting was about until I was in it, so how could I have told her I didn't want to discuss those things at work? no.. she wanted me in a corner and unprepared.. but I wasn't stupid.. my gut told me what was coming..
it just goes to show how much you have changed in the past year..we'll probably be talking to HR on this, if not gone away.Sounds like she is threatening to give you a bad review because you have "changed". I would definatley take the messege to HR. You must protect yourself. If nothing else it might help you get moved to a different position.
I felt there that she was threatening me.. as if she didn't like that I had taken her jw power away and so she was retaliating, threatening me that if I didn't behave, then we WOULD be talking to HR more..
omg.. she does something illegal and then tries to throw it all back in my face like I did something wrong
Sassy:
The funny things is I asked her what that meeting was about? asked her if I should be concerned and she refused to even tell me what the meeting was about until I was in it, so how could I have told her I didn't want to discuss those things at work? no.. she wanted me in a corner and unprepared.. but I wasn't stupid.. my gut told me what was coming..
She used company e-mail, company time, and even an empty office when she knew there would be no eye witnesses to observe what she was doing. Having used those resources, the logical conclusion would be that she wanted to meet with you for company business and you attended that meeting in good faith. She's the one who was not acting in good faith with her intent to use a business setting to deal with a personal issue.
I'm glad you trusted your gut, and suspected what was coming. It gave you some leverage in the end. Don't let her intimidate you. I'd print out all the e-mails she sent you and make multiple copies, just so she knows that you have the upper hand here, not her. If you can get a copy of the voice mail, I'd do that too... it gives you the power to intimidate her.. not the other way around.
She's the one who picked the battle, not you. Always remember that.
Love, Scully
(((Sassy)))
I double 2nd Scully's comments to you
Make sure HR hears that voice mail....it is "priceless".
She is a vile person and not one to be trusted....I despise people like that...
I am sending you extra hugs to get thru this CRAP.................
CodeBlue
Wow, Sassy. I am just catching up on this thread myself. Remember, the chill only has to go one way. Get yourself some fresh flowers for your desk, bake some green St. Patrick's cookies, and be your genuine self. Let her chill alone.
Unfortunately, she is continuing to escalate, so you will have to continue to document. I agree with others:
I would definitely let HR hear the voice mail too, especially if it has a time/date stamp on the message. She's carried on harassing you about the HR issue outside of office hours AFTER THEY TOLD HER TO STOP, by calling you on your private number saying she wanted to "talk about it".
I'm glad you trusted your gut, and suspected what was coming. It gave you some leverage in the end. Don't let her intimidate you. I'd print out all the e-mails she sent you and make multiple copies, just so she knows that you have the upper hand here, not her
I made copies of everything and also took notes and wrote down everything said by her.. HR asked me for a second set, so I know that they took it seriously..
as a matter of fact, just the fact that she made the comment that 'she' would never have jeapardized my job or livelyhood, tells me she got a very serious scolding........with a threat of job loss..
thanks CB and Jg.. I so appreciate you guys support as well
What you did was totally uncalled for, it was the cowards way out. I can kind of see what kind of level we are going to have to deal with each other. I would never have thought you were capable of such a thing, but it just goes to show how much you have changed in the past year..we'll probably be talking to HR on this, if not gone away. I've added me own statement of what happened and asked to relocate.
Sassy, why did she leave this on your voice mail? Why didn't she say these things in front of HR? Do you think that perhaps she was afraid she'd look bad? I guess so since she realized she'd made a mistake after leaving the first message. I bet she sweat some bullets when she realized you could play that first message for HR.
You rock, Sassy. I am so pleased that you turned the tables on this sister. I know you care about her and you'd never do anything to hurt her. She forced your hand and you had to act to protect yourself. Why should you allow her to make your life so uncomfortable with anxiety? I admire your assertiveness. I've had to learn to be assertive. It's not easy. The thing is, this sister didn't seem to care when she was making you worry. So don't worry too much that she is uncomfortable. You can learn the best lessons when you're uncomfortable.
Hugs.
I made copies of everything and also took notes and wrote down everything said by her.. HR asked me for a second set, so I know that they took it seriously..
Euph was right about her being a smart cookie - from the emails, you'd never know that she wanted to discuss a personal religious issue with you on company time. She was trying to cover her tracks so she wouldn't get in trouble. She was counting on being able to intimidate you.
If there's any way you can forward that voice mail to a permanent record, I hope you'll do that. Especially if it happens that she gives you a poor performance review. You want to establish that she's created a hostile work environment based on her religious intolerance. If she ever complains about you going to HR again, your best response is "I didn't do anything illegal, you did."
Hugs, Scully
Semper Fi!
W.
Sassy,
When I wrote my DA letter, I specifically said I had made my decision and did not wish to discuss it with anyone and did not want the elders to call or visit.
I had to hide out for a month because they did exactly what I asked them not to do. They even waited in their car and watched to see if I would peek out the window. My little girl did so they got out of their car and knocked at my door again.
When my mom finally got ahold of me, she was all upset because I wouldn't talk to the elders. I told her I already knew what they were going to say: I would not get to live in the paradise and I'm rejecting God etc etc etc..... I told her I just didn't need to hear how I was going to be killed in Armageddon by them.
I found the best method was to just write the letter, breath a sigh of relief and then be prepared for the crap that comes with it. Try not to get discouraged as it is their stupidity and brainwashing that causes them to act the way they do. We are all living through this here and we will survive!!!!!
Moanzy
