DA Letter

by Sassy 92 Replies latest members private

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  cruzanheart

  You rock, Sassy!

  Nina
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  jeanniebeanz

  well at times she is my unofficial supervisor.. so it could get tricky/sticky yet

  More for her than you if the workplace is what you mean. I've been a HR Manager for years, and if something like this was brought to me, not only would I have read her the riot act, but I'd also be watching her like a hawk. One more infraction, and her job would be toast in the legal interests of the company I protect. Under current law, if management knows, or *should have known* about an issue like this, and allowed it to go on, the employee being harassed would have cause against *the company*. Believe me, they'll not put up with any quid pro quo from her in her treatment of you from this point forward. It'd make them liable and they know it. That being said, I am very sorry you are going through this. It is so hard to understand this jeckle and hyde behavior from people who seem so kind outwardly and until questioned on beliefs. Kind of like Gremlins; don't get them wet! Jeannie
• 

  Big Tex

  "Just one more thing and then I am done with it. I asked XXXX (her elder hubby), what is the time frame with when you call her PO to find out if she contacted them, a month? and he told me (her) it is generally two weeks. Just so you know what you are looking at"

  Sassy, I'm sorry I didn't see this thread until just now. Bless your heart, after all you've gone through the past few weeks, now this! Feel good about standing up for yourself. Yes it's scary, but you did it. That is part of recovery, claiming your power.

  Okay, so she's got an unofficial status, just remember you have the law on your side. This situation is exactly why HR laws were enacted. This is harassment of the highest order, and it has nothing to do with the business which should be going on in your office!

  You've been given a big card to play, and you should use it only if you are put in that position. If the elders do contact you, it will be because this woman contacted them. You then have every legal, moral and spiritual right to go to HR and report this woman as being in violation of the law, as well as their specific directives. Remember you are not asking for this to happen, but you can, and should, protect yourself. If this woman behaves in such an egregious fashion she shows she does not have your's company's best interests at heart, to flagrantly violate directives and the law.

  Having said that, I realize this is not much comfort. I've been in your situation before, and it can be a cold and lonely place. Just know that we are all there with you (damn if I could just have 5 minutes alone with that woman!). It may not help, but you've got a lot of people rooting for you to succeed. If we can't do it for you, at least we can cheer you on.

  Chris
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  Bryan

  Yeah! What that Big... Texas... Chris guy said!

  Bryan

  Have You Seen My Mother
• 

  Sassy

  well......she ran home today early (2 hours early).. she did not return the phone call to HR, so I am assuming when she got the request to meet with HR, she figured out what it was about.. and decided to run home and talk to elder hubby for advice on what to do next.. since if HR gets involved.. so are laws..

  maybe she knows what it feels like to be anxious or threatened now..

  not that I want that.. I don't.. I do still love the woman.. but I want my peace.. free from anxiety of elders
• 

  simplesally

  btt in support of Sassy.

  I know, like Euph, that this woman is a kind woman at heart. She truly is being led by her own heart. She needs to realize though, that this is a work environment and, therefore, has no right to bring up religious issues there.
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  Xandria

  Sassy,

  You did the right thing. I know it isn't easy when emotions are involved. She crossed the line. As for her feeling the pressure, she involved herself in this matter to the point of trying to force you to face a "moral" issue, that she has no real business to involve herself in. Period. Thus this is a effect of these decisions she made, is something she has to face. Cause in effect. She set the sequences in motion, basic physics apply. Each action has an equal and opposite reaction.

  X.
• 

  blondie

  Good move, Sassy, going to HR. No point in having the elders hounding you at work or her giving out your phone and home address.

  My hubbie just had orientation about confidentiality on the job. He asked about what would happen if a JW reported about medical info to the elders...he was told under the laws here that it could lead to a year in jail and a $35,000 fine....

  I understand what it is like to have JWs under foot when you are trying to fade.

  Love, Blondie
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  Sassy,

  I understand that you care for this former friend, jw sister. You're just very loving & caring that way. I understand because I would feel the same way about my former witness friends.

  Still, I can't help but feel very angry with her for her unprofessional conduct. I understand that she is doing what she thinks Jehovah God expects her to. The thing is, no one said Jehovah expects her to bring the JW issues into your secular workplace. The WTBTS has nothing to do with your company. This sister doesn't own the company.

  Sometimes it seems, zealous JWs go above and beyond what the org expects of them, when it happens to be someone they are close to. My sister drove to visit my former sister in law, nearly 150 miles away to ask nosey questions about me. Then she called my ex husband/jw to say hurtful things and share in a bash Heather fest. She then called the elders in my last cong. I have never heard from them to this day. She called them to tell them that she thinks I am living with Andy and that she is certain I am apostate. My ex has talked to the elders as well. I told him he was scripturally free. Like I say, I have not been contacted by any elders. If they have done anything or made any announcements, no one has told me. I'm pretty sure my sister would make an exception to her self imposed shunning to tell me if I was DAd or DFd.

  I wonder if those elders will actually care to do anything in your case. It's not like you are still active and doing the evil-bad-no-no things.

  I feel for you. I hate that this has to happen to someone as kind and lovely as you.

  I often wonder when the ax will fall on me.
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  Golf

  Make it short and sweeet. No need to further dwell on this negative situation. I sit here shaking my head.
  
  Yesterday I accidentally ran into my younger brother who is an elder (I helped to learn) by surprise at the local post office. He said hello, and we chatted about some business, I caught him by surprise. He was pleasant, elders can talk to people like me, if they want.
  
  Guest77