XQ is full of inaccurate, inane, stupid statements and outright baldface lies.
hello im new and I need your help
by PaNiCAtTaCk 109 Replies latest members private
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NewLight2
Hi Panic,
I got your PM this time. You may not be aware that there is another poster 'new light' that posts here too. (http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/member/11838.ashx)
I am NewLight2 (http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/member/4781.ashx).
Perhaps you have us mixed up, as I was never at Bethel
My Story:
I became interested in the JW beliefs when I was in 7th grade. There was a JW girl in my classes. She and I had many discussions during that year. But that was many, many years ago. It was not until I was an adult that I was a 'JW Bible Study'. Even though I was studying with an Elder's wife, she found my questions very difficult to answer. Some of the reseach that was done during that time is posted on my web site.
NewLight2's Links Page
Because I asked very dificult questions during my 'Bible Study' that could not be answered via WT publications, I was never 'love bombed' when I attended the KH. Instead, I was treated as an 'outsider'. They gave me no reason to continue attending. I found the JW's to be a very unloving group of people.
I have been reading and posting on JW forums for about 7 years now. I started posting on the original H20 board. These boards have taught me much about the hurt and pain that JW's have experienced. I, too, have experienced much abuse and pain in my journey through life.
NewLight2 -
Rabbit
I haven't had a chance to read anything past the first few posts, I will later.
I did want you to think of this tho'. My JW wife (now X-wife) and ME raised our children as Witnesses. Now 2 of my children are shunning me, one has come back. It's a long story. The thing I want you to realize is: The longer your wife and child are brainwashed...the longer it will take, if ever, to help them get out. Your own child could be turned against you. I was a Witness over 35 years. I know.
Follow your heart on this one. Whether you need to fade...like me and a lot of others here because of JW relatives or just walk away. Please do not allow them to continue to have this power over you and your family. Remove it as-soon-as-possible to save your family from as much pain as possible.
Rabbit
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PaNiCAtTaCk
They asked me tonight to put up next years text. You know, the one behind the podium on the wall. I am getting with the presiding overseer to do it but I couldnt help but feel extreme guilt for telling him that I would. I just feel like I am not qualified.
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bebu
Panic, I've never been a JW, so excuse me for asking a weird question.
I just feel like I am not qualified.
??? Do you mean, rather, that you feel like a hypocrite? I imagine you are probably capable of handling a hammer and nail or whatever banner system is rigged into your hall. Do you need to work for privileges for putting up a banner, like one works for handling a mike?
Sorry if this sounds rude.
bebu
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Country Girl
Mr. Pan:
I feel so bad for you having to go through this "new light" (to use the JW terminology) that you are experiencing, but excited for you at the same time. I believe that it's part of your path. Life is full of cycles, birth, and re-birth, in spiritual, physical, and emotional planes. You are embarking on a new journey that will be filled with wonder, fear, shame, guilt, horror, grief, joy, happiness, relief, angst, and all of those other wonderful human emotions that are stifled because of oppression by an authoritarian body.
You seem to think that you will have nowhere to go if you leave. Where the heck do you think you're going to go? Do you think you will just fall into a giant chasm that will open up in the Earth to swallow you at your decision to exit? You don't HAVE to belong to anything, or anyone, but God, if you believe in him. It says that in the Good Book. That's what took me years to understand, too... that my relationship with God was just that: MY relationship with God. No organization or person could come between Him and I. Cool, huh? There's no pressing engagement with Armagheddon, and if there was, it wouldn't matter, because I trust implicitly that He will take care of me when the time comes since my faith is not works-based, but grace-based.
Now this here religious part is just my $.02... Lots of people come out and find that they don't believe in God anymore, and that's just fine with them... and just fine with me.. and just fine with everybody, because we are all free-agents.
As I perceive it to be, as long as you do two things, as suggested by Him in the New Testament, you should be free of guilt:
1. Love Him with your whole soul, heart, and mind.
2. Love your neighbor as yourself. Basically, the Golden Rule.
The rest is all speculation, because if you love your neighbor as yourself, that basically covers all the bases. I'm sure everyone would agree that the Golden Rule's a pretty good one!
However, you seem to never have enough guilt. You should be ashamed of yourself for being a "guilt glutton" now! You feel guilty for *everything*! Geez, man.. at least me have my own fair share of the guilt. Good Heavens my friend, are you going to try to take on the guilt of the whole world like Jesus? That was a half-hearted attempt at humour.. so please don't be offended.
A question you might want to ask yourself, continually, is: "Is this guilt I am feeling *appropriate*?" In other words: There is the guilt that is appropriate for things such as not paying your child support, murdering someone, things like that. Then there's inappropriate, fear-inspired guilt for such things as: "Am I worthy enough to hang this banner behind the podium?" C'mon... that's a little bit paranoid, don't you think?
Feel guilt for the REAL BAD things.. don't feel guilty because you're thinking in a new way. Appropriate guilt has its place, but should not be obsessed upon. It should be used as a stepping (learning) stone for the grander being one is becoming! ">http://www.head-cleaners.com/guilt.htm> Nothing is so loud in the universe as a person putting aside old behavior patterns and putting newer, more constructive ones in their place, because that is a battleground that most of us don't want to play on! Let appropriate guilt be a building block to personal growth and achievement, but throw the absurd guilt into the trash, especially when you have set upon a new course.
Guilt is the result of fear. Love does not spring from fear, nor does it inspire fear. If you follow the simple two rules above, you should (ideally) have no fear.
Putting it into action is another thing.. hehehhe. Good luck, my friend, and remember: we are always here to help you sort it out, offer a venting platform, or just a shoulder to cry on.
No one said it's going to be easy, but it sure as shootin' will be interesting.
Go on, jump in the pool!
Country Girl
**Edited because the older I get, the worse I speel, and the worser I feel...
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Emma
There is life after leaving the Witnesses. There is happiness too.
Dear Panic,
You may believe as I did, that there are no true "friends" outside of the org. When I left, about ten years ago, I envisioned myself alone and friendless, not able to trust anyone, but it was better than staying with the hypocricy and lies in the congregation I was in. I couldn't have been more wrong; I immediately made friends and had a support group that has helped me through bankruptcy and divorce, finding a job and learning to deal with real teenagers.
Your wife will find friends, too. You just feel there is nowhere else to go and no one else to rely on; it's simply not true! Like so many other things, the wts is wrong on this, as well!
Whether you move fast or very slowly, everything will be all right if you act on your heart and what you believe in. We all care.
Emma
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PaNiCAtTaCk
Hi, in response to why I felt guilty about doing something as simple as hanging next years text. If their was a brother in my situation in the hall their is no way that I would ask him to do something like that. He should be viewed as spiritually sick and until we have some encouraging sheparding calls with him and I see him commenting more and visiting more with the friends along with getting his hours back up he shouldnt be given extra priveledges. Before a brother gets to run mics, sound ect. He has to show the congregation that he reaching out. It shouldnt be a suprise to the congregation that they see him getting more responsibilities. Nobody knows what in someones heart and I agree with that. But the way the JW congregation works a persons heart especially a young brother is gauged by works most of the time. Service, comments ect. ect. At this point I havent met for service in a few months although I still turn in time and
it would be a suprise to some in the Hall to know I was getting some responsibility. They will feel im not qualified or they may think to themselves "Man, I been busting my butt in service and commenting and I should have been asked." -
jgnat
PanicAttack, it is true that from the outside, this "reaching for priveledges" looks inane. NeonMadman described how different the voluntary arrangement is in regular churches, here:
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/82155/1343870/post.ashx#1343870
I would say that my church operates the same as Neon's. They spent some time with me to discover my talents/abilities, and to appropriately match my talents to jobs in the church. Know what I got? Sunday school helper to four year olds....the same age as my beloved granddaughter. I look forward to my once-a-month commitment with great joy, getting to hang out with my favorite people. For me, Christian service is an easy load (yoke), because I was well-matched to the job. I think this is a superior arrangement. All JW's, shy and bold, smart and simple, strong and frail, have the same job, regardless of their native strengths and weaknesses. Besides that, the talent pool is cut by half, ignoring the leadership abilities of many women.
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PaNiCAtTaCk
Hi the MS emailed me again I just thought I would share what he wrote this time.
HEY BRO. AND SIS AND LITTLE BRO.,
HOW HAVE YOU GUY'S BEEN DOING? IT SURE WAS GOOD SEEING EVERYBODY AGAIN. WE MISS EVERYONE VERY MUCH. I ENJOYED OUR LITTLE CONVERSATION THE OTHER DAY AT THE STORE. SORRY IT WAS JUST A LITTLE ONE. YOU GUY'S LOOK GOOD LIKE ALWAYS. I LOVE ****** AND HIS STAMINA. HEY *****, HOW IS YOUR JOB WORKING OUT? HAVE YOU GOT A CHANCE TO PULL ANY TEETH LATELY? HERE IS A GOOD ARKANSAS JOKE. HOW DO WE KNOW THAT THE TOOTH BRUSH WAS INVENTED IN ARKANSAS? BECAUSE IF IT WAS INVENTED ANYWHERE ELSE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN CALLED TEETH BRUSH. OUR BACKWOODS BOYS ONLY HAVE ONE TOOTH TO BRUSH. (HA, HA) ANYWAY I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. YOU GUY'S PROBABLY ALREADY HEARD IT. WE JUST FOUND OUT THAT A DEAR SISTER IN OUR CONGREGATION, *********, HAS TERMINAL CANCER IN HER LUNGS SHE WENT IN FOR A STOMACH ACHE AND THEY FOUND ALL THAT CANCER ALL OVER HER LUNGS. SHE IS THE MOTHER OF THE SISTER THAT STUDIED WITH ******, HER NAME IS *********. HER HUSBAND ****, IS AN ELDER IN OUR CONGREGATION I HAVE BEEN ENCOURAGED BY HIM HE HAS NOT MISSED A MEETING SINCE ALL THIS CAME DOWN AND HE STILL GOES AND DOES HIS PRISON MINISTRY. I GO WITH HIM ON MONDAYS. THIS BROTHER IS COOL. HE HAS A HANDICAP, HE CANNOT HEAR, HE HAS TRIED HEARING AIDS AND THE LATEST HEARING GADGETS BUT NOTHING WILL HELP HIM TO HEAR. BUT HE DOES NOT LET THAT KEEP HIM FROM SERVING AS AN ELDER, REGULAR PIONEER, BOOK STUDY OVERSEER. HE HAS LEARNED TO ADAPT TO HIS HANDICAP HE HAS LEARNED HOW TO READ LIPS. ISN'T THAT COOL? WHEN I GO TO THE PRISON WITH HIM I SERVE AS HIS EARS AND WHEN SOMEONE COMMENTS THAT HE DID NOT CATCH HE JUST LOOKS AT ME AND IF I NOD MY HEAD IN A YES MOTION HE PROCEEDS IF I NOD MY HEAD IN A NO MOTION HE STOPS AND EXPLAINS THE POINT MORE CLEARLY. IS NOT THAT AWESOME? SO I WANT TO ENCOURAGE YOU GUY'S TO KEEP FIGHTING THE FINE FIGHT OF THE FAITH AND DO NOT GIVE UP, WE ARE SO CLOSE TO JEHOVAH'S PROMISES. I KNOW THAT BEFORE THE PROMISED NEW WORLD ARRIVES WE ARE GOING TO UNDER GO SOME VERY SERIUOS TESTS OF OUR FAITH. SOME ARE GOING THROUGH THEM RIGHT NOW, SOME LATER, !
BUT NOW
IS THE TIME TO CULTIVATE TRUST, CONFIDENCE AND LOYALTY TO JEHOVAH SO WHEN THE GREAT TRIBULATION COMES UPON THIS SYSTEM OF THINGS WE WILL BE PROTECTED BY JEHOVAH'S STRONG ARM. I PRAY THAT THIS E-MAIL FINDS YOU ALL GOOD AND WELL. UNTIL THE NEXT TIME.
YOUR BRO IN THE FAITH
*****