Things you will never hear a good Jehovah’s Witness say (to another Jehovah’s Witness)

by hoser 55 Replies latest social humour

  • pixel
    pixel

    Aleluya!

  • charonsdog
    charonsdog

    "Nothing about the Flood makes any sense."

    "We met on Tinder!"

    "Do you want to come over to watch Leah Remini's expose on Jehovah's Witnesses?

    "Mom! We're out of Vaseline and Kleenex!"

  • menrov
    menrov

    Cannot go to the meeting because

    - my kid has to go to soccer game

    - need to organize birthday party

  • sir82
    sir82

    So did you sign up for the blood drive?

    I don't know about you, but I thought that last convention was the dullest one we've ever had!

    I know you want to get baptized, son, but you really ought to wait until you are an adult before making a lifelong commitment with such serious consequences.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    "why in gods name did my parents choose this cult ?"

  • sparky1
    sparky1

    "Would you like to join me at my Yoga class this Sunday?"

    "Did you win anything in this weeks lottery?"

    "Do you want to make a trip to the casino this weekend?"

    "How would you like to join the bowling league that I belong to?"

    "Would you like to attend my birthday party?"

    "You are a complete jerk. The only reason that we are 'friends' is because of shared religious beliefs."

    "No I don't want to waste my Saturday 'pioneering for a day' ".

    "Become a Bethelite? The hell with that. I need to make some money to support my family and be sure that I am not a burden on anyone in my retirement years."

    "My wife loves EVERY sexual position. She is so passionate that I have to take time for myself just to rest up!"

    "How is your IRA doing? I hope you are investing enough for a secure retirement."

  • Simon
    Simon

    FYI: If you post vile smut it will be deleted. If you do it again you will be deleted. It's not even funny, it's just childish. Read the posting rules.

  • blondie
    blondie

    thanks simon

  • RubaDub
    RubaDub

    Simon ...

    I apologize for my earlier comment.

    Will not let this happen again.

    Rub a Dub

  • blondie
    blondie

    Actually my experience with jws and getting drunk, at circuit assemblies we were invited to parties where the room trash baskets were full of empty liquor bottles and it was flowing like waterfalls. And these were elders and MS. No hiding that. I wonder what the maids thought?

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