Ok so it seems this thread has produced quite a bit of confessing so here’s what happened to me. It all started around four years ago. My partner and I had been together quite a few years and had two very young children, both pre-school. We were constantly fighting to keep our heads above water financially and it would have been too expensive to pay for childcare so that I could work, so he was working seven days a week. He also worked nights so I felt like a single parent most of the time. Being at home and isolated with two children was so, so hard. It was also hard for him, which I didn’t really see at the time, but he was working so many hours just to provide for us that we never had any quality time because even when he was at home, he was so tired that he didn’t really get involved with the kids so I struggled on alone and he worked as hard as he physically could. So we drifted apart over time and just lived our separate lives pretty much. I was so lonely, especially in the evenings but I swear I never thought about trying to meet someone else, faithfulness was always very important to me, regardless of my situation. Then I met someone on the internet. We met through a mutual interest in music and would innocently chat online in the evenings. Over time I spent more and more time chatting to him and he was my lifeline at the time, he was a good friend and was someone to talk to. This went on for a couple of months and the more time I spent talking to him the more I realised just how much we had in common, and it showed up more and more flaws in the relationship I had with my partner. After around three months of chatting and emailing each other my partner started to suspect something. So when I was out one evening he went on the computer and read my emails. There was nothing sexual in them but they were affectionate and from his point of view it looked really bad. He confronted me and I could see that he was devastated. I explained why I had become so close to this other man, and that we hadn’t even met but it didn’t really help. I would talk to the other man about my failing relationship and for my partner to read these emails must have been terrible for him. I promised I wouldn’t have any contact with him again but it was too much of a temptation, I’d be alone at night, my partner would be at work and the other man would be waiting on his computer to talk to me. So I carried on in secret. I pass-worded everything and covered my tracks the best I could. We started to speak on the phone and text each other, and so that was another thing to cover up. I kept my mobile phone switched off when my partner was around and looking back, it wasn’t too hard for my partner to know that I was still in contact with the other man. After about eight months of talking the other man, we decided to meet. My relationship at home had gone from bad to worse and I felt that I was falling in love with the other man. So we met up. And it was at that point that it just all hit me. He was really nice, but actually being with him made me realise that I was wrong and I knew there was no way that I could cheat on my partner, however bad things were. That following week I decided to break of all contact with the other man. This was easier said than done considering that he had just left his wife and was hoping that I would move to be with him. I knew that I wanted to make things work with my partner, and I started to try really hard. But I had left it too late. A week or two earlier he had met another woman. One night I tried to sit down and talk to him about our relationship but we ended up arguing. He stormed out the house and I said “either come back now or we are over” well, we were over. That night he went to the other woman and slept with her. He moved out of our home and was seeing this other woman. It wasn’t serious, he just wanted an escape I guess. I was devasted, both for what I had done in the first place and for him leaving me and sleeping with another woman. But after a month we talked it all out and decided to try again. It was so difficult, I found it hard to get past the fact he had slept with someone else, and he found it hard to trust me after all my sneaking around for months on end, although I hadn’t technically cheated on him. It took a long while to get over it and I suppose it still haunts me sometimes but ironically, it was what was needed to make or break the relationship. We are really happy now, we both work and get by ok financially. The kids are at school so I’m not under so much pressure. But now we look after each other and treat each other properly. He is a brilliant partner and father, and I cant believe I ever considered cheating on him. I learned my lesson and so did he, and we came out the other side, but it’s a hard lesson to learn and I wouldn’t wish it on anybody.