My mother continues with these creepy letters

by sosoconfused 62 Replies latest jw experiences

  • sosoconfused

    THanks guys for all the words of support.

    I dont know if I am in some way cold but her letters mean nothing to me. All I see is a brainwashed person who can not listen to reason.

    Mind you she sent this email to me and my wife. My wife went nuts on her two days ago because she said I was a tool of Satan and that if she needed to being the grandkids to come live with her that she would help her... WTF

    She lives like 20 minutes away and never calls for my children never wants to be in their lives. SHe refused to go to her play because she said the characters in Dr. Suess are demonic...

    She loves my older brother the exbethelite and exspecial pioneer far more than me and my sister. Always has and always will. So she pays with her SS checks to fly down the little 8 year old unbaptized publisher she loves soo much and buys toys and gifts for that lives 900 miles away, but she wants to SKYPE her other kids who live 20 minutes away

  • cantleave

    Arghhhhhhh!!! I have no vested interest in that letter, yet it made me yell at the computer screen. Sorry you recieved this.

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    Wow. You are on the path to eternal destruction, but shaving will get you well on your way back to salvation.

    Super stupid cultspeak.

  • sosoconfused

    @breakfast - do not forget I am on "deathrow" but a quick shave gets me pardoned. ROFL

  • gorgia2


    Thank you for posting your mother's letter. It reads just like the conversations (one-way!) my aunts on both sides of the family used to begin whenever they saw me. I make sure they don't see me any more.

    Once my mother used to say I was going to be destroyed in Armageddon but she, like me, is out of all that nonsense now.

    My df'd cousin receives flip-flopping letters from her mother every now and then - sometimes the letters are asking to see the grandkids, sometimes they are written to reinforce the fact mother and daughter can not see each other any more. Utterly crazy.

    Hang in there!!!


  • DesirousOfChange

    My first reaction would be to send a "strong" reply, but then you have to remember that anything you put in writing as in an email, "can and will be used against you" in the Sanhedrin, since I suspect she would be inclined to hand all the info over to the Elders.

    My only suggestion would be what many have already stated here, you can only ask questions -- have doubts -- let THEM do the research. If your dad truly is researching (beyond the WT-CD Rom) he will surely have a "reality check" or he will be forced to just close his eyes & ears.


  • humbled

    Every word is calculated to devalue, condemn and undermine your every thought and action. There is no reasoning, no conversation. There is only pressure to conform.

    She isn't giving up so easily.

    Dude. Your beard? Keep it. After what she said it would always bother me if I lost it after her letter.

  • BackseatDevil

    Jehovah has blessed you both with much, but you can lose it in a split second.

    Yes, but what he hasn't blessed you with is peace an quiet. So...

    Dude, this is creepy but very typical. I was df'd, kicked out of the closet, living an open gay life, and fighting for equal marriage, flat out told my mom to stop talking to me, told her I would never step foot in a kingdom hall again... and last time I talked with her she mentioned she still had hope that I would return. The other brothers did too.

    So I get the appeal of "fading"... but (and I'm asking seriously) at what point do you just say "f off already, it's not gonna happen!"?

    Thanks for posting this. And good luck, sir.

  • mamochan13

    soso - I used to get these kinds of letters all the time from my mom and my aunt. They are very hard to take, and my mom wouldn't hesitate to say some really awful things. But I understand the perspective. They really, truly believe you are going to die. They really believe you are somehow an evil, different person because you no longer follow the religion. In a twisted way, the letters are an act of love, because they are hoping you will be moved to come back into the faith, and by extension, the family.

    I tried responding with reason, i.e. "my daughters and I are good, moral people. We love you and want a relationship with you, but we no longer believe the same things. CAn't you respect that?" I also tried, "you raised me to be an independent thinker. It's a good thing to think for myself". I never attempted to change her opinion, just tried to always send the message that we were good people and still worthy of love. I didn't always respond, but tried to keep it succinct, just "thank you for caring, but we are fine" type message.

    My mom finally slowed down with the letters, although she would start up at certain triggers - holidays, political things. We read these letters with our eyes opened and see things so clearly now. If you can look beyond that and remember the power of the cult mentality, understanding that the writer really does believe they will save you from death, it can be more tolerable.

  • Giordano

    I am never that sure that JW's actually believe everything they are taught since the odds are pretty good that if the friends really show them disrespect hard core believers immediatly can and will leave the organization. There's a lot of ego involved in a group like the JWs.

    What I see from her letters is a chronic need for you to reflect her beliefs.... a beard distorts that is disrespectful even though the WT shows the apostles and Jesus with a beard. Her point of view only makes sense if you believe she is rational.....obviously she is not.

    I think it would be better to tell her that you no longer want her to communicate with you or your family...... no emails and no contact until she is ready to put her entire family first.

    Give her a dose of what she intends to do to you. I doubt if it will bring her around but one never knows. More to the point stop allowing her to disrepect your wife and children.

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