worn out ministerial servant!

by El_Guapo 119 Replies latest jw friends

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Find and read the Letter to Bodies of Elders re: Pornography.

    Figure out exactly what kind, how often and whether or not you masturbated to it. Be careful! If you pick stuff that the WT deems too "debased" you may end up Disfellowshipped. Anyway, if you admit to just the right blend of porn and wanking, they will have no choice but to remove you immediately.

    Just a thought.


  • El_Guapo


    To be honest, I'm not angry at all. I always thought that people who had doubts or turned their back to the borg were angry or bitter. But to me it was lack of requirements for true Christians LOVE.

    Example: A couple years back, a young girl was having a sleep over party with pizza, ice cream, movies etc for other 10-12 yr old girls. My neice was invited. An elder asking me if my neice got the invite too (he had two young girls) I said yeah... (That's all my neice could talk about at the time) He said and I quote:

    Elder: Im not letting my girls go.

    Me: Why?

    Elder: Just, trust me I wouldn't let your neice go either.

    Me: Why, what's the matter?

    Elder: Nothing....

    Me:cool (of course I went home and was wondering why) - Next day I google the family father, mother, kids. Turns out the dad is a registered sex offender. I saw the dude's mug on the Megan's law site

    Me: Elder xxxx, why didn't you tell me? Do the other bros. know?

    Elder: No, and you can't say anything.

    Me: That's not fair, bros. in the know get to protect their kids, while the rest of the friends are in the dark?

    Elder: I didn't say anything, and you can't say anything either.

    I made the mistake and kept, my mouth shut. (My niece didn't go, my sister and her husband had to go out of town that weekend) So we dodged a bullet. But, I always asked myself: why not tell the friends??? That's not loving at all. Why expose children to this monster.

  • 00DAD

    EG: I always thought that people who had doubts or turned their back to the borg were angry or bitter.

    That's another lie they tell you.

    Of course, many of us are angry for a time. Some of us for a long time. But that "anger" is not a result of "doubts" or "turning our back" on a God that has nothing to do with this religion. This is the lie.

    The truth is we are angry because they LIED to us about some really important things, and they are NOT who are what they claim to be and they ARE hypocrites that are more interested in protecting their silly publishing company than little girls or boys. Also, their wrong-headed policy of institutionalized shunning has broken up a lot of families and destroyed countless relationships.

    The anger is justified. They are the ones at fault and yet they continue to blame the victims. Typical response from an abuser.


  • problemaddict

    LOL @ Open Mind.

    OOdad is right. Anger is normal. Get it all out here, and keep from doing anything stupid. I still can't seem to stop doing stupid things, but so far, nothing has stuck.

    I would just be honest with them here. You no longer wish to serve, and you need to give some attention to your health. Thank you, come again.

    Try it. The simplicity is great. Don't be ashamed, don't write a lettter (paper trails are NEVER a good idea), just pull someone in the back. BTW, you should have told the others about the sex offender whos house they were being invited to. Its public information and they have a right to know. An elder telling you not to, is actually commiting an illegal act. Just an FYI.

    You: Hey brother givesmelotsawork, you have a sec?

    Bro: Sure after I am done walking around looking busy during the meeting because I'm important. Ok now what was that young padowan?

    You: Just wanted to let you know, I have decided for now it would be best if I stepped down. I also would like to take care of my health which has been deteriorating.

    Bro: Well perhaps if you prayed more and stopped masturbating like we discussed last week but forgave you on.

    You: Yeah, i have prayed about it, and I am convinced this is the right thing for me to do. Thanks again. I look forward to serving with you again sometime.

    Bro: Harumph, harumph.

    You: (silently) whew!

  • tootired2care

    don't write a lettter (paper trails are NEVER a good idea)

    I think they actually require a letter to approve your stepping down, at least that was true in my case. Gotta love it; you have to be approved to step down! So by their own admission it is not really a voluntary position.

    No wonder they tell you in such a wierd way to get you in that position in the first place. Two times right before a meeting started after the c/o visit I was pulled aside by the brothers and asked "is there anything preventing you from serving?" Talk about being put on the spot! If you answer yes your announced that same night. The whole process is just so bizarre. I wonder what happens when you say no?

  • problemaddict

    Hmmm. I don't know if that is the case. Then again I did not "step down", but was removed. Maybe its something to put your file in in NY?

    What I want to know, is JWfacts was able to get all of his files from the Australian branch because of a fair use information act of some kind. Is there somethign similar in the states? I know someone who dealt with a pretty bad issue, and I would love to help him get records from the branch. i think he would do it too, and it would bring him to the light side....by which I mean this place.

  • El_Guapo

    Tonight's the night!.....

    Still debating on how to do this:

    1.) use my diabetes as an out and deal with whatever pushback.

    2.) Show infamous deaf JW youtube video to elder and say this guy is describing ME.

    3.) Or just stop answering my phone and door, etc... (I know this option willl bring the "hounds" quick)

  • Auntfancy

    Welcome El Guapo, I wish you the very best. So much helpful advice was given to you and I am sure you will handle it well. Being a diabetic myself you really need to watch your stress level and I too would use that as the reason. I too saw the lack of love and that is what started me on my journey and thank heavens my husband followed me right along! I would recommend you read the books Ray Franz wrote if you haven't already and also there are two books by Steve Hassan, his first and recent book that will help you get the cult mentality out of your head. There is so much wonderful information on this and other sites that has helped us so much. I haven't had time to post much but I try to read when I have time. Best wishes to you!

  • BluesBrother

    Hi, El Guapo . It is good to hear from you.

    Some years back I was a busy elder but disappointed, disallusioned & sick of it. I knew I had to come off eldership. I prepared the way by talking to the P O but he just said that he was tired too. I waited untill the C/O was due and then gave them a letter of resignation.

    They knew by now that I had doubts but they did not want to accept my resignation. They seemed happy to have a WT o/seer who admitted to doubting it!! I insisted but they resisted .Under pressure I agreed to allow a forther 6 month's rest period with no elder duties and see how I felt then. The C/O spoke to me and I told him the same with no effect. I decided to ham it up a bit and (truthfully) told him that I had a deep appreciation for music "that he would call heavy-metal", as a release for stress .. He visibly blanched and the colour drained from his face. That was it ! I was told that I was no longer an elder.

    Shortly after that I stopped reporting and ministry......

    They may not think that way today, but whatever works for you...take it.


    Letter writing is good!! Look at it this way. If you write a letter expressing your views then you are on permanent record. It may sound like a bad thing at first, but having been through it I am now proud that my views are there for all to see. If something big goes down with the Org and the Governments maybe being a lowly rank-and-file who is not even publicly called an ordained minister by the GB anymore will work in our favor. I would suggest that as things deteriorate within the Org that any Elders or Servants get out of positions of authority. You will be thrown under the bus.

    You will feel sooo much better in a couple of months of being a rank-and-file. Then let your hours slip and get off the microphone/stage list. Then because of stress only give Bible readings which will be few and far between. You can even miss those! Just watch, the big machine will keep right on rolling without you. Take care of yourself brother. If you are single then go back to school and learn a trade to support yourself with. Never let them make you feel guilty. The GB won't give you a dime when you are old, but they will sure as hell take your property..

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