It isn't nice.
Nice is probably more your skill, dear NC (again, peace to you!); I openly admit that it's not mine. And when I try to be "nice", I feel like a phony and very untruthful. I realize that I am lacking some of the... mmmmm... social "graces" you (and many women, and some... mmmmm... shall we say, more sensitive, men?) might desire. Indeed, you might consider me insensitive (actually, I'm not - I'm just pretty forthright... and somewhat desensitized, which isn't the same thing. Add to that a "forehead of flint" and, well...).
Just to give a rounded out understanding, I am not sentimental (at all, never have been)... nor am I melancholy (and have little patience for those who are). I once did a post explaining that my brain works less like Venutians than it does like Martians (think "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus"), primarily because I was raised by a father, without a mother. So I learned to conversate pretty much like the "guys" (sans the usual melarkey - you know, references to appendages and other body parts, bodily functions, women's body parts, etc - and emotion).
What you perceive as not "nice", therefore, is more just me being "upfront" and honest. It's a bit of a cultural thing, too. While there are exceptions to the rule, of course, the women in my culture don't go for a whole lot of "sweet talk", like some others do.
Add to all of that my vow to never lie as to God and Christ again... to anyone... about any of it... regardless of what it costs me... well, then...
I hope this helps and, again, peace to you.
A slave of Christ,
SA