Confused...

by raxxxx 64 Replies latest jw experiences

  • ShadesofGrey
    ShadesofGrey

    I have never seen that misquote site before. I learn something new everyday.

    This site was very helpful to me and integral in getting my husband to come around: http://www.jwinfo.net/?p=1

  • Aussie Oz
    Aussie Oz

    welcome raxxxx

    The shock of finding the truth about the "truth" takes a while to deal with and you will go through a lot of self conflict. Hang in there.

    Be prepared to lose the girl friend unless she too has doubts and is willing to act on them. Be very cautious as what you tell her will likely end up in others ears...

    If she does not love you minus the WT then she never loved you.

    True love is not based on believing in the same invisible friend or religious teachings.

    oz

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    You poor, sweet thing! Just about everyone here has stood where you now stand. Don't feel alone, because you're not. I read somewhere that it's estimated that there are more exjws than there are jws. Listen to all of the good advice here about keeping your mouth shut while you research. If it gets to be too much, you may want to see a counselor and start making friends on the outside, if you haven't already. You have made a good start by joing JWN. You will find a wealth of information, online friends, and maybe even friends in real life.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    Welcome.

    Be patient. Time is on your side. Investigate. Read. Absorb. Take time to think before coming to any decisions. Your family may take a hardline JW stance, and shun you. It certainly has happened before, so don't think it couldn't happen to you. Read the experiences of some on this forum, then formulate your own plan.Yes, it is upsetting to find out the truth about the organization, and hard to question since you've been told so many times not to....they have done the research for you....

    Hoping the best for you.

  • nugget
    nugget

    Take your time you do not need to make any decisions straight away. It can be challenging to realise that the organisation you have been supporting is just an organisation and not Gods representative on Earth. For me it was like a bereavement and my mind was in a whirl for a while. Reading is essential as this helps to give direction and answer questions. It is also essential to ask questions in a safe environment. As has already been said this is not something you can discuss with friends and family in the organisation and definitely not when your mind is in a state of confusion.

  • finallysomepride
    finallysomepride

    Raxxxx

    welcome aboard

    & make yourself at home, no shunning here LOL

    fsp

  • sizemik
    sizemik

    Raxxx . . . welcome.

    All the advice here is good and trustworthy and there's little I can add. This forum can be of immense help to you so use it to your advantage . . . ask anything, and I mean anything. We've all been there. It's not pleasant. it has to be said, being in this position . . . but it does get better. Just follow the advice and research for a start.

    Size

  • cantleave
    cantleave

    Welcome,

    Many of us have been where you ar estanding now. It is tough coming to the realisation that what you have always known is not what you thought it was.

    But it gets better and better, and when you are free of the organisation your life wil improve dramatically.

    Please check you PM's

    ANGUS

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    A big welcome to you.

    LeavingWT said:

    1. Do NOT tell any JWs about your doubts.

    Absolutely. Don't talk to the elders about anything you are doubting or reading. Just smile and say all is fine. Don't even confide in your girlfriend at this point. Finish making up your own mind about where you are heading before you plan on what to say to others.

    2. Read, read, read and read. Research. Think. Ponder. Read, read, read.

    3. Recommended reading, in this order:
    - Crisis of Conscience
    - Combatting Cult Mind Control
    - Captives of a Concept

    To help others, another book after COMBATTING CULT MIND CONTROL would be RELEASING THE BONDS; EMPOWERING PEOPLE TO THINK FOR THEMSELVES. Both of those books were written by Steven Hassan.

    Quick information can be found at jwfacts.com. You can go there right away and start learning some different aspects of the truth.

    CRISIS OF CONSCIENCE was written by a former governing body member who realized the problems you are realizing and can also be ordered as an online book at http://www.commentarypress.com/Detail/eng_crisis_e.html and you can start reading right away (or you can find the printed book at that same site or at amazon- http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/0914675044/ref=dp_olp_0?ie=UTF8&redirect=true&qid=1320752413&sr=1-1&condition=all. )

    I don't see the Steven Hassan books as pdf, so they would have to be ordered as books. http://www.amazon.com/Combatting-Cult-Mind-Control-Best-selling/dp/0892813113/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1313954037&sr=8-1 and http://www.amazon.com/Releasing-Bonds-Empowering-People-Themselves/dp/0967068800/ref=pd_sim_b_1.)

    CAPTIVES is also on Amazon, but can be directly ordered as a printed or pdf book at http://www.captivesofaconcept.com/NewOrderInformation.html.

    Some of these are available at public libraries. I only link them for you because some people are unsure about going forward. These books can change your life and are that important. If funds are very limited (or you wouldn't be able to recieve mailed books at this time without raising eyebrows), at least get the pdf of CRISIS OF CONSCIENCE and think about the rest for later.

  • mankkeli
    mankkeli

    Use your senses and take things easy, refuse the tendencies of making rash decisions, anticipate the journey ahead of you and examine the lives of those who have walked along similar path, while you do this, try to visualize the consequences of any decision you will be making from now and steadily weight all options discreetly. Should incase you will be needing help, Send me a PM.

    Take care, Check your PM.

    Mankkeli (Cyber Doctor)

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