Stayed up all night, see it is a cult now.

by gutted 122 Replies latest jw experiences

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  Cadellin

  Gutted: A Big Welcome to You!

  You've already been given a ton of great advice. I might add one more "must read" to the list and that is Richard Friedman's Who Wrote the Bible? You will quickly discover that the WTS's biblical scholarship is about on par with their scientific... You have some great things going for you already--you're young and have your whole life in front of you and it sounds like your mom isn't going to shun you. That's huge, believe me.

  But, still, be prepared for the fact that a certain amount of pain and shock is unavoidable. You will get through it. We've all walked through the fire (some of us still are) but it DOES get easier and easier...In the meantime, there are so many great posts here to read and shoulders to cry on, if need be.
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  gutted

  Yes everything is very fresh. I still believe in love as taught by Jesus, but without all the conditions and in fact the traditions of men that the society itself has impossed. How does one go about study of the Bible free from religious pretext and tradition, but still keeping with the principles and ideals of love, justice etc? Is it a scholarly study of the Bible or simply a self-study reading?
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  Blue Grass

  You so have to read "Crisis Of Conscience" and "In Search Of Christian Freedom" both by Raymond Franz. Nothing you'll read on the internet can match the value of those two books.

  P.S I just want to warn you that the vast majority of people on this board are atheist so after they finish love bombing you they'll start their normal routine of bible bashing and trying to convert you into an atheist. They like to take advantage of people like you who just found out the watchtower is false and try to use that to convince you the Bible is false.
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  Blue Grass

  I might add one more "must read" to the list and that is Richard Friedman's Who Wrote the Bible?

  Not sure why you're recommending this book. Gutted requesting information about the watchtower and jehovah's witnesses and that book has absolutely nothing to do with either.
• 

  benjammin

  Pace yourself through this experience, friend. At this point you have some control over how it will play out. It is sincerely frigthening to acknowledge the doubts you are encountering, and my heart goes out to you. Sounds like many of us have been at this same spot (me too). If you're like me, then it must seem like there is nothing out there as far as support and understanding go, and that you stand to lose everything that is important to you.

  I was born and raised a JW and I had a deep love for it (my whole family still are). I am not anymore, though. I am familiar with your anguish and one time would have called myself too weak to face these things. For me, it was complete turmoil and it seemed unfair at every step of the way. It felt like a true transition from "Life A" into "Life B". But the truth is- you don't know yet how strong you can be, depending on what you decide to do. And you have time on your side. Take your time and remember to make the choices your own. You can do this.

  Some things really helped me. I was able to cultivate some quality friendships with people who are not JW's, sticking with people who understood my boundaries and respected what I was going through. I continued my internet research about JW's and read a great book- "Blood on The Altar: Confessions of a Jehovah's Witness Minister" by David Reed. It's very scholarly and fair, and is loaded with captivating history of the organization as told through the personal experiences of a former elder- one who seems like a nice enough guy. I found support for my point of view, but (honestly) I could only find it outside of the organization. As a 22 year-old, lifelong Witness, I felt I already knew the reaction my concerns would receive if I even mentioned them.

  This isn't easy. Remember others have been exaclty where you are at now. Find support for your point of view. And remember, friend, that some of the doubts you are encountering are products of your own good conscience, sensibility, and sensitivity.
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  Lady Liberty

  Dear Gutted,

  You asked if it is scholarly study of the Bible or self-study reading?

  I would say both. But if I were you,+ I would examine the teachings of the organization starting with all the older literature. You will soon see that for YEARS they have flip flopped around, on different things, things they claimed at the time, that they were being lead by Holy Spirit with..and since we know Holy Spirit cannot get things wrong, you have to ask, were they being lead by Holy Spirit in the first place.

  The most damning information, is the Societys older publications. Remember God CANNOT change. Light can only get brighter, if...for instance, we may not understand a command from God..but over time it is clearer, or "brighter" and we can clearly see why it was a command to begin with.

  However, something that was wrong, can never become ok...remember..God does not change? So the law, or restriction was never from God to begin with...see my point? For example: For years it was a disfellowshipping offence and considered cannalbolism to have a organ transplant. Now it is ok, considered to be a conscience matter...what about all those who DIED because they followed the Societys instruction that is cannabolism...how would you like to have lost your mother, only to find out later..it would have been ok to begin with, and she died faithful to an organizations ever changing rules?? Such bloodguilt they have!!! Certainly this teaching was NOT from God!!

  I was shocked in all my research to find the Bible I prided myself on using that had returned Gods name to all the original places, had gone BEYOND and ADDED to the Greek scriptures...inserting Jehovahs name where it never was, confusing the line between Jehovah and Jesus. If you look at the greek Septuagent I believe it is...a society publication, and compare it to the NWT, you will see where they have added, changing the meaning of the scripture.

  Keep in mind..the scriptures warn," If anyone adds to or takes away from the things written, even if it was an angel of god..LET HIM BE ACCURSED." So that being said, if you read the Bible, I would get yourself one that shows 6 or so translations at a time to get a broader understanding...but I would steer clear of the NWT, at least steer clear of using it as your only source ..as people at the door used to tell me, "You have your own Bible"...implying things were added to it to change the original meaning..I always blew them off as to having no idea what they were talking about. Now I know it was I that had no idea.

  I agree though...in addition to our research start with Crisis of Conscience..

  Sincerely,

  Lady Liberty
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  Wasanelder Once

  Gutted, you have not "joined" any group by posting here. It is YOUR journey. It will be unique to you though many of the situations will be similar to others here. Never assume that your choices are exactly like those of others. You have your feelings, family and future to take into account. Some will say abandon everyone and move on. Others will say to take it slow and feel it out to see how to retain family ties. Your situation is your choice. People will tell you how to achieve either scenario. This is where the advice is so helpful. Let others support your choices, not make them for you. That's what the WT used to do for you. I am so pleased that you are still a young person and learning this info. You may have choices available to you that were not there before ie: dating a lovely person, college, a good paying job that is intellectually satisfying and Sundays where you don't have to do what they say. Whatever your choice you will find support here. Me? I'm a fader. It's better for me at this time. The day will come when I tell them to take a flying ..... I post videos on Youtube under the name Truthbookblues. Check them out and let me know what you think. Good luck young sir. W.Once
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  upnorth

  ---gutted---

  Do you mind stating how old you are ?
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  Lozhasleft

  I wish you well Gutted...good advice here and some really wonderful people....I'm still trying to heal too and thankfully I still have my faith in God which has truly helped.

  Loz x
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  White Dove

  Oh yes, by all means the journey is yours and yours alone to make. So Just as Wasanelder Once said, some will offer advice on how to fade slowly to keep your family intact and others will offer advice on quitting faster. It's all up to you. These guys and gals on here are smart and experienced with leaving in one way or another. You will never be alone in any step along the way, no matter how you choose to leave. We are behind you 100%