To Ex-JWs: Do You Regret Learning it Was a Lie?
Do You Regret Learning it Was a Lie?
I regret learning it was a lie in a limited sense being that sometimes the truth hurts. It hurts to find out that all your friends that you have accumulated over the years in the cult will instantly become your enemies and that all your hard work in going door to door was for a lie and that all the self sacrificing you have made to save people and put Jehovah first as they say was wasted energy on a pipe dream.
Other than that I have no regrets I would rather know the truth than be in darkness and slave for a worthless cause.
But realizing that some are very old and their supports system evolves their still believing in the Organization I'm reluctant to go out of my way to destroy their hopes and relationships in side the WT by spending any effort to deprogram them.
I will help someone who is only recently gotten involved with the WT and shy away from trying to convince those who have spent many years unless they are asking me and really want to know.
When I first left I went on a letter writing champagne and sent letters to as many as I could but now see such efforts as not a good idea my wish now is only that the WT stop its shunning practise and gradually lift its iron hand from off the friends but that will never happen any time soon I'm afraid.
:Funny story; I came to a more complete understanding [yes, JW buzz-phrase] of the nature of Middle Eastern men after taking up belly-dancing and associating with such men - a more vain, arrogant, self-centered group of smugly self-righteous chauvinistic males you would NOT want to be around!!
I discovered the same thing when I took up belly dancing.
"I think we'd all have to admit that we did not like discovering we had been deliberately lied to by a very clever and deceitful organization, and I was devastated when my world came crashing down around me."
What's more painful is that many of us have met many of those guys and they aren't all that clever, either. It's embarrassing to have fallen prey to a group of barely literate geezers. I'm as angry at myself as I am at them.
I want pictures!!!!
Paul, your comment, "I don't know what's worse. Believing that you have a wonderful future of living forever on a paradise earth or knowing the truth that all that awaits you is a cold dark grave."
I'm going to re-print that, with a bit of high-lighting...
"I don't know what's worse. Believingthat you have a wonderful futureof living forever on a paradise earth or knowing the truth that all that awaits you is a cold dark grave."
As many others have stated, what if you'd wasted your entire life in this cult, then on your deathbed you realized what a buncha hooey it was??? Me, I'd rather face the "cold dark grave" than loll around in a pretend 'paradise' that was actually filled with viperous lies...
Besides, facing the "cold dark grave" is what Benjamin Franklin was referring indirectly to, when he said, "For those who love life, do not waste time. For time is the stuff that life is made of..."
Good ol' wise Ben! That comment grasped my mind when I first heard it; I refer to it often in my daily life... I would advise the same to all, and as so many other wise people here have stated; it's a total WASTE of time and life to spend it in an organization based on and riddled with lies...
Zid Oh. And what Nicoulaou said, too: "What do I currently believe to be true that may yet turn out to be a lie?" Another thought that I use daily as a cautionary guardian...
I dont regret learning its a lie.
That is evidence that I have at least a 5th grade intelligence and can function
and feed myself and move about freely.
I am sorry that the Watchtower is a lie.
It would have been nice if all this bullshxt had ended in 75 and we were now on
to new and better things. New forms of bullshxt.
Because i did not learn it was a lie till i had been out 12 years. I left because i no longer wanted to be a christian.
so, even if it were proved true, i would not go back
I don't regret learning it was all a lie. I regret believing in it so completely that I married a JW, chose to remain childless, and lived a financially irresponsible lifestyle because I thought "the end" was "just around the corner". Now I'll spend the rest of my life reaping the consequences of those stupid choices.
I have been thinking about since you posted it. I certainly do not regret learning it was a lie, but there is more to it than that. Being a witness give a degree of definition and structure to your life. If you don't achieve it is because you don't have to in this system, it is temporary and you have the opportunity to achieve in the new system. Now that belief has gone I am lefy feeing that I have wasted so much being mediocre. I am not stupid and have done relatively well, but certainly not up to my full potential. I have also become quite lazy, doing just enough to get by. I now have no excuse, I should be going hammer and tong capturing what I let go. The thing is I now don not have the ambition. Most people at 43 have reached their peak, I don't know if I want to expend the energies I should have in my 20's and 30's in my 40's.
So I don't regret learning it was a lie, but I do feel it has added a new layer of complexity to my life.