Why don't you just take it like a man? (page 16)

Highlander

It isn't a matter of just getting over it. This board serves a good purpose for those making the initial transition out of the jws. Unfortunately, many, if not most xjws continue to spin their wheels on that first stepping stone. Eventually we need to realize that the scenary hasn't changed and it's time to take the next step. Quite often, I believe, it requires professional help. Unfortunately it's far too easy to remain here, enabling eachother. Telling eachother it's always someone elses fault, but never our own responsibility.

AllTimeJeff

Unfortunately, many, if not most xjws continue to spin their wheels on that first stepping stone. Eventually we need to realize that the scenary hasn't changed and it's time to take the next step. Quite often, I believe, it requires professional help. Unfortunately it's far too easy to remain here, enabling eachother. Telling eachother it's always someone elses fault, but never our own responsibility.

Highlander, if that is what you see, then who am I to tell you differently? I don't think that your approach will matter to the target audience in question. It's not like they are going to say "The JW's have wounded me to this very day, but lo and behold, HIGHLANDER told me to get over it. Why didn't I think of that before?"

I find it interesting though in my own experience that many here choose to bring up their past as it helps those who are recently out. Speaking for myself, my own experiences still hurt me, but if I wallow, I guess I wallow. I realize that I am not responsible for anyone here, and I try to offer advice as little as possible.

My experience teaches me that people will "move on" when it "clicks" for them. Nothing that you or I do will ever change that. This is why my preferred method is to support, and not to judge. Lets face it, we all look the same behind our computer screens... Know what I mean? (Doe, you don't have to answer that last question.... )

John Doe

Let me ask you this Jeff. Have any of the opinions expressed here caused you to reexamine your actions and motivations?

AllTimeJeff

Let me ask you this Jeff. Have any of the opinions expressed here caused you to reexamine your actions and motivations?

On this thread? Or in general? For this thread and topic, it has caused me to revisit a topic I have gone back and forth on quite a bit. For general purposes, all the time.

beksbks

PM Jeff

Goodnight everyone

John Doe

My experience teaches me that people will "move on" when it "clicks" for them. Nothing that you or I do will ever change that.

My experience teaches me that we all have an effect on each other, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.

AllTimeJeff

My experience teaches me that we all have an effect on each other, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.

I don't disagree. Having an influence is different from those that either live their lives purposely or by default. I simply choose not to make those judgments about other people, whether I meet them in real life, or on the internet.

I hope I will be forgiven, but I must get some sleep.. I have a long Monday ahead of me... Perhaps we can pick this up another time.

SixofNine

My experience teaches me that we all have an effect on each other, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.

Ah, so AkJeff is right to engage Witnesses when and if they try to shun him, rather than just taking it "like a man"?

John Doe

I hope I will be forgiven, but I must get some sleep.. I have a long Monday ahead of me... Perhaps we can pick this up another time.

By all means. Sleep well.

Highlander

Don't misquote me. I stated that it's not a matter of just getting over it, which you convienently left out of your post. In case I'm not being clear enough. This board serves a good purpose for anyone making the initial transition out of the jws. Eventually every individual on this board needs to reassess where they are in life and make the hard decissions necessary to achieve positive results when they realize that this board isn't getting the job done. You reach a point of diminishing returns on this board and it can be a very difficult thing to realize. Giving support is one thing, enabling a victim mentality is another thing.

How many individuals have been here for multiple years with 5000, 10000 or more posts? In many cases the tone of their individual posts have not changed from topic 1 through topic 10,000. Where is the individual growth? Or do we prefer to remain stagnant?

Why don't you just take it like a man?

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