Is it possible for a child to be exposed to JWism and not be damaged by it? (page 10)

Scarred for life

Oh, I completely belideve that it is true. I relate to it very closely. I didn't have the exact experience as that little boy but very similar.

dinah

BTW - the story about the little boy and his toy soldiers is true. It is profoundly sad and enlightening all at the same time and so for me, anyone who dare believe that exposure to the Watcthower is not abusive or dangerous, clearly shows a lack of comprehension in the growth and development of a child. Children grow into adults - sammieswife.

That made me cry, because there are so many true stories just like that.

All it takes if one mention of something from the podium. There goes your music, your toys.

Kids NEED play time, it helps them unwind (yes kids feel stress too). Saturday morning should be spent eating cereal watching cartoons, or outside playing tag with the neighborhood kids. Well, the Witness kid is being dragged out in service--having to meet classmates at the door and die of embarassment. And having close friendships with the neighborhood kids or kids at school? You can forget that. It must be someone approved by Jehovah. Bad associations......yadda yadda (puke).

The Witnesses essentially rob you of a childhood, because anything that childhood entails is a waste of time. You should be achieving more in your ministry----they will say this to a 6 year old! No toys or coloring books to pass time at those meetings. When you are little an hour seems like a day. Just try telling your kid that you will play a game with them in a hour. They will ask you every 5 minutes if it's been an hour yet.

While I do agree with whoever said being raised a Witness is not equal to physical or sexual abuse (of course so many of us suffered through that one too---with no help) but being raised a Witness changes what you would have been. Your personality development is stifled. Makes some of us stronger, yes.....but damn whatta way to gain strength.

JWdaughter

No, even second gen. children of opposers are damaged by it! Even those who simply reject it and leave after childhood cause they never cared or believed in it are touched by family members or friends who reject them for it. My kids are just the grandchildren of a JW and are affected by it negatively.

Some damage is a stubbed toe, or a broken fingernail. Some damage is fatal or life altering.

OUTLAW

No!!..Be a good little JW Kid or God will Destroy you!!..Thanks Mom and Dad I`m only 2..LOL!!..............Picked on at school..Going to meetings not getting home till late..Then going back to school,dog tired..Every Frigg`n Week!!.............Making cold calls on homes out in the field service at the age of 7.....WTF??..I had no Idea what I was preaching about.."Good morning Sir/Maam,I have 2 very interesting magazines you can have for a contribution of 10 cents"....Those magazines never made any sense to me at the age of 7..They still don`t..What was I doing knocking on strangers doors at the age of 7?..It certainly was`nt by choice!!............I could go on,but so many here,have already said so much............................... Laughing Mutley ...OUTLAW

dinah

To be rejected by Grandparents over this would be a blow to a child's self-esteem. Hopefully they will understand when they are older that it was NOT their fault.

LeslieV

well stated sammieswife.

Leslie

sammielee24

My only hope is that one person who is an active JW or perhaps a lurker or perhaps an apologist and even someone with one foot in and one foot out - that if they have children, the read and understand these stories because they are the stories their children will tell in time.

Parents give their children up to the Watchtower. They hand them over to be raised by them. Most will of course tell you they don't - but if that were true, we would not see them out knocking on doors or hear them being offered words of encouragement to pioneer and forgo a good education. We would wonder why a kiss is portrayed as so evil and association with good, kind people is wrong. We would wonder why we are told that we must cut off our non JW relatives even though our child could have a life enriched by their presence. We would take responsibility for those things instead of reaching for the WT magazine that directs the raising of our children.

Life is joy. It is full of wonder and beauty. It is full of good and kind people. Let your child benefit from all of that - sammieswife.

dinah

That's right Sammie. Our stories will be repeated over and over and over...........

Damn cult.

mamochan13

Insightful and interesting thread.

I don't think it is possible to escape the damage, but I think there are multiple environmental factors that determine the extent of the damage and how well a person can heal. A child raised by two JW parents, with virtually all other family members also JWs, remain isolated within a bubble. They may be able to function quite happily, not really knowing any different.

I think a far greater potential for damage exists when only one parent is a JW. For me as a child, I was raised believing that my father was going to be destroyed - so I was afraid to love him too much. We looked down on activities he enjoyed - i.e. Christmas, birthdays. If he took us to a football game we had to make a big deal of not standing for the national anthem when he did - so I learned to belittle him because my belief system was "superior". I remember him taking my brother and I to a Christmas party and proudly suggesting to the magician that his pretty little daughter could join him on stage as an "assistant" - and how embarrassed he was in front of all his friends when I refused because magic was evil. So soon he stopped taking us anywhere. I was taught that his rules were not to be obeyed if they conflicted with those of the religion. If we ever did something wrong, we had to take great pains to hide it from him so it would not reflect badly on the organization - soon I learned that my father had no right to discipline me. I could go on, but bottom line is that my ability to develop a healthy father-daughter relationship was taken from me by the religion.

The damage to a child's ability to form healthy relationships with non-JWs can be profound. I still have difficulty with relationships - my children do as well, since they learn from watching me.

Relationships are just one aspect of damage - there are so many others, as this thread attests. And I completely agree that education is essential to helping repair the damage.

dinah

Mamo,

Exactly the same here. My Dad was never a JW and I was afraid to get close to him, and the constant reminders that my father would be destroyed by a hateful God for not attending meetings or knocking on doors THAT was my first taste of cognitive dissonance.

I look back at those wasted years with my Father and it makes me mad. He was a great daddy! Thankfully, somehow he managed to teach me through the blinders those things that I would need to know later.

Yes, those who are generations in with BOTH parents in have it worse.

Is it possible for a child to be exposed to JWism and not be damaged by it?

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