It would have been nice to grow up NOT thinking the end of the world was coming before I ever reached adulthood. That has made the whole aging process harder for me. When I turned 30, I was mad that I was still here. See, when I got df'd I was basically just waiting for God to kill me because I didn't want to be a Witness anymore. Turning 40 was much easier, I finally had learned it was all lies in my early 30's. But even now, things pop up from time to time that I don't think I would be dealing with had I never been taught all that crap from birth.
Is it possible for a child to be exposed to JWism and not be damaged by it?
by Mickey mouse 140 Replies latest jw experiences
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quietlyleaving
It would have been nice to grow up NOT thinking the end of the world was coming before I ever reached adulthood. That has made the whole aging process harder for me. When I turned 30, I was mad that I was still here. See, when I got df'd I was basically just waiting for God to kill me because I didn't want to be a Witness anymore. Turning 40 was much easier, I finally had learned it was all lies in my early 30's. But even now, things pop up from time to time that I don't think I would be dealing with had I never been taught all that crap from birth.
I never was afraid of armageddon because I believed that Jehovah in his "righteousness" would excute me cleanly and quickly. My nebulous fear was Satan and I'm glad to be rid of that now.
disfellowshipping I've not experienced and my wish is that it could be done away with. I think that there is a possibility of that happening if enough of us make the GB alarmed that we'll take legal action if they continue with the practice.
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BabaYaga
As a tiny little girl, I used to stand outside in the mornings waiting for the school bus terribly anxious, PRAYING ARDENTLY that Jehovah would NOT make Armegeddon come that day while I was at school away from my Mommy.
Yeah, it was a great way to grow up.
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Lady Lee
quietlyleaving
If JWs were a powerful soul destroying cult why hasn't the government done anything about them?
In most countries where there is a Bill of Human Rights there is a built in Freedom of Religion clause. Courts is very wary of crossing that line. Just look at teh example of fringe polygamists who take underage girls as secondary wives. Or the right of parents to determine medical treatments for their children. They tread very lightly when they have to intervene to protect the life of a child - not the rights -- the life.
Cults use this Freedom Of Religion clause to literally get away with murder in the name of religious beleifs and practice.
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Lady Lee
quietlyleaving
Please remember that what we have on this board is a powerful illusion of suffering that we are creating and this can engulf those who are feeling temporarily emotionally unstable and cause them to sink lower than they need to be.
"illusion" I know my story is not typical of most JW families - of most families JW or otherwise. But there is no illusion in the accounts of people who post here. And I can bet that almost everyone of us here know of several JW families where there was significant harm done to them by growing up as a JW.
And if you find a family where just one person has been DAed or DFed then the damage is more than significant not only to that one person but to the family as a whole. Examples:
- A son who still lives at home is DFed. His parents can no longer talk to him about spiritual things. Family communication is strained. The family is now "marked" because they have 1 person in the family that is supposedly non-repentant of some crime putting the whole family in danger.
- A mother who is DFed. Her children are shunned because they have to "associate" with a person who is DFed. (This was my crime and instead of the congregation supporting my children they avoided them. They lost life-long friends because their parents would not allow their children to play or even talk together).
- A couple leaves the WTS. They are marked and considered DAed. When a child marries they is not invited to the wedding. The bride does not have her father walk her down the aisle. He mother does not share in the planning and joy. Something vital is missing and it taints the whole family.
- A grandparent dies. DFed and DAed people are not even told about the death until they later discover it by accident. (my family again but I'm not alone)
- A person is considered weak and is mark and shunned before any announcement is ever made. People lose life-long friendships over . . . well they don't really know why other than the WTS says they are now "dangerous to spiritual health"
- A wife is an alcoholic but it is covered up so people don't find out - I know this one.
- A husband beats his wife and it is covered up. According to the elders she has to stay with him to hopefully "win him over".
- A man abuses a child sexually and it is covered over. The victim is told there is nothing they can do and that he or she and the family must not tell anyone in the congregation about the allegations or be libel for charges of instigating divisions, slander and lying. They aren't even allowed to tell other family members to be careful of their children around this person!
- A family member dies and the DFed person is shunned at the funeral. The shunned person is doing good if they are even allowed to enter the KH. Forget sitting at the front with the rest of the family.
- A family member does something wrong and rather than face a judicial committee and risk being DFed they commit suicide.
I could go on and on and on. All these things divide families.
You say you are quietly leaving; don't go to meetings because they are too boring. A few questions (don't feel you have to answer them here. But they might warrant some serious thought):
- What effect does that have on your relationship with your children? your granddaughter?
- Are you welcomed into their home?
- Are you considered "weak"? C
- an you visit with your family?
- Can you equally participate in all family gatherings?
- Can your granddaughter come visit for sleep-overs?
- How do you think this might change over the years if you do not go back?
- What will they tell your granddaughter about you if you don't go back?
- Will she be told you are bad and will be destroyed at Armageddon?
I will stick by my belief that the WTS rules damage children, sometimes seriously. They can and do destroy families
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sammielee24
There is a lot more to life within Jehovahs Wintesses than the mere rules and regulations and their infraction listed here. JWs do not go around snooping on one another. A few in each congregation are like that but elders usually ignore them until somebody else comes along and mentions the same thing. Elders do not go looking for corroborating evidence. They really are interested mainly in the spiritual condition of the flock. But there are corrupt people in every field no less among JWs.
Most certainly they do and most certainly they have. I know first hand what they do and so do a lot of other people...if you just read a lot of posts on this board you will see what they have done to people.
I know a group of Elders that slept outside one girls house because they heard a guy had been visiting her...they did that until they caught the guy leaving and then confronted her at 6 am. She was disfellowshipped. I know a body of Elders who heard that a couple of kids had been having parties at their apartment and they surrounded it for days until they got the evidence they needed. They chased the JW kids around until they confessed and then disfellowshipped them. I know Elders who with the help and on speaking with an exwife, spied on an ex husband for a month so that they might confirm fornication and disfellowship the man. They did.
That's just a few instances. If you believe it doesn't happen then that is up to you but I know better. I believe you mentioned that you haven't been disfellowshipped, and if this is the case, then you really have no idea how a child is forced to behave or the feelings they have to suffer when a parent or sibling or themselves are disfellowshiipped. I've watched parents shun children..and in that shunning, they ignore the birth of their own grandchildren and I've seen children forced to shun parents. I've known kids who grew up with mom as a JW but not dad and forced to believe that dad is in satans world and weak but mom is the warrior and will live forever...as a little kid you dont' want to die and that fear makes you side with mom. You don't get close to dad because he's dead anyway...the ramifications of those issues resurface multiple times in other relationships down the road.
I was talking to a young woman who was booted out 15 years ago when she was 18. She suffers from that today as there is no contact between parents and siblings still in - no family memories, no support..her own kids don't understand why grandma and grandpa don't like them. The damage done lasts years and years and for generations...it is not a benign religion. People inside don't see the truth of whats happening until they step outside or are forced to step outside. I am really glad that you have not been affected in any way but I'm a realist in that I've seen how life can flip in an instance when one dares to try and leave...and no life should be destroyed by any religion if it is a good, kind, truthful, loving and compassionate one. sammieswife.
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quietlyleaving
Lady Lee, sammieswife you are both taking what I said out of context. Babayaga, I thought the same as you but as a catholic (hellfire).
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quietlyleaving
lady lee
quietlyleaving
If JWs were a powerful soul destroying cult why hasn't the government done anything about them?
In most countries where there is a Bill of Human Rights there is a built in Freedom of Religion clause. Courts is very wary of crossing that line. Just look at teh example of fringe polygamists who take underage girls as secondary wives. Or the right of parents to determine medical treatments for their children. They tread very lightly when they have to intervene to protect the life of a child - not the rights -- the life.
Cults use this Freedom Of Religion clause to literally get away with murder in the name of religious beleifs and practice.
I see it as a balancing act between the rights of a child, the rights of parents, the rights of minorities etc.
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beksbks
I will stick by my belief that the WTS rules damage children, sometimes seriously. They can and do destroy families
Absolutely LL!!!
There are perfectly nice folks involved in this cult, and I have some fond memories of weddings and picnics etc. But those things happen "in the world" too, maybe more! No good can come of a mind controlling cult. And that is what this is.
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sammielee24
LOL....Sorry but it's all here in black and white. I stole this part of the Ciro talk - the one that the kids get to hear..we've all heard it before. If a person can honestly believe that a little kid can sit through this and not be hurt in some way - well there is nothing more to say is there? sammieswife.
Ciro begins his talk by claiming that listening to his talk will...
...give us strong encouragement to lay firm hold on this hope that he has set before us. And best of all, friends, believe me, when it is all over, we will love Jehovah our God more than we ever did before.
Yes, we will leave this hall today with a far greater appreciation for the loving way Jehovah is using his son to save us. However, you must be awake to the fact that very soon the greatest tribulation since the world's beginning will come in upon all those dwelling upon the face of all the earth. This is going to be a terrible time for mankind. Our godly fear, including your speaker, will be increased beyond measure. We are going to be frightened, friends, during this time.
However, when Armageddon is over, we are going to face a rather gruesome, no not a rather, a very gruesome situation. Let's turn to Jeremiah 25 and see what he says about it through this prophet.Jeremiah 25:33:
"And those slain by Jehovah will certainly come to be in that day, from one end of the earth clear to the other end of the earth. They will not be bewailed, neither will they be gathered up or be buried. As manure on the surface of the ground, they will become."
Try to picture this, friends. This gruesome picture. Dead bodies and body parts of the wicked will lie strewn on the surface of the ground. In streets, alleyways, fields and buildings. Now notice that God in this verse tells us that no one will mourn or bury these dead ones. Now what does this tell us? It shows us that we will not be traumatized by His mass annihiliation of these individuals. No, his divine execution of the wicked will not haunt us for the rest of our lives. Rather, we will react to it today as we do when a vicious serial murderer is executed- how do you feel about him when he gets it? Why, we will feel an inner satisfaction.
Our indignation has been appeased. Yes, a sense of triumph that at last, Jehovah's justice has been served. AIDS has been stopped, the gays are gone, the homosexuals, the lesbians, the murderers, the drug lords--all gone. Are you going to feel sorry for these people? No. (chuckle by speaker) And those that don't mind them living around, you going to feel sorry for individuals? No. Now how will Jehovah dispose of these bodies of those slain by him.
Ezekiel 39 and Revelation 19--you can look this up at home, we haven't got the time-- tells us that he will beckon his wild beasts and birds to come and devour their fleshy parts. However, the vast numbers of cadavers will be much more than they can consume.
Therefore, Jehovah will doubtless use a highly scientific means at his disposal, perhaps antimatter, to disintegrate the putrefying organisms. Now, especially in cities where we live, there is going to be a high concentration of dead ones. We're going to have to need them, because the animals in the Bronx zoo if they got out still couldn't eat all the bodies in the Bronx. (laughter)
No, but Jehovah demonstrates his practical wisdom. He prevents disease from spreading to us from the putrefying flesh of all these dead ones. He rids the earth of this foul smell, and believe me friends we'll need to get that cleared up, and he will keep our air and water free from pollution. So He knows what he's doing, he's running the show, he'll take care of it. Thus, wherever we are, our God will thoroughly, according to Ezekiel 39, cleanse the land. And remember many of us are going to lose our homes, and everything in them as mobs of mad men attack one another they will devastate city blocks and the country side.