Just to review, I had my meeting today with the two elders who say a sister has accused me of "grinding" with her and thus porneia.
So I printed out several of your comments on how to defend myself. I felt good about standing my ground, and repeating that I had not "grinded" with this ex-friend and that she wants to ruin the relationship I have now with the sister I am dating.
However, the two elders today really tried to pressure me. They said the sister will come and testify against me. Also that other sisters have confessed that I committed loose conduct with them.
(I should add that a lot of sisters come on to me and initiate physical contact. I am not that great of a guy, but there is a shortage of brothers, I mean a major shortage. So some sisters are ummm extra friendly, they complain about how they never get any affection, and we sort of mess around, while not exactly doing it. Some I see months or years later and they say they are happy they at least tried something, since they can't find a husband and are in their 30's, some in their 40's now.)
So anyway, the two elders tried to trick me. They said another sister, a second sister had confessed to loose conduct with me, and that that makes two witnesses. They said Holy Spirit is revealing who I am. It kinda bugged me because several sisters have come over my house for a little movie-watching with a group, but with their short skirts on, and their low-cut blouses and really come on to me. I dont know if any of you have ever seen this happen among JW"s but wow, some of these girls are really forward and agressive. I resisted all of them up to a point. Actually, in the past 10 years, we are talking about 5 or 6 sisters. Again I am not that great of a guy, or good-looking, I just act normal and fun and laugh, and that leads to conversations that leads to other things. And they always say the same thing, "Hey I dont want any committment, I just like a little affection." But then later, when they see me talk to another sister, vengeance is their goal.
So the two elders today grilled me for over an hour. They asked me again and again to confess loose conduct. I refused, i said all the stuff you guys told me to, like they are bearing false witness, and that I never grinded, there is no proof, I am OK with Jehovah, I have a clean conscience.
But they wouldn't stop asking me again and again, saying if I don't answer the truth, I will probably be disfellowshipped. They got pretty angry and talked about many sisters are saying I took advantage of them. I mentioned how these sisters come over my house, not theirs. I showed them some emails where sisters invite me places alone. But they said it is the brothers responsibility to stop the sisters advances.
So now that I denied everything, they are calling every sister I ever knew, including when I served in another country, all the congregations where I was a circuit overseer, they are interviewing my family. They said I confessed to my sister that I fool around sometimes. They are going to bring at least 7 sisters who say I flirted with them, or was making out with them in secluded places.
Ok everyone, what do I do now? Am a really a piece of garbage, I used to feel like the girls enjoyed the affection, they always asked for it, and then moved on, now I feel like maybe I am wrong.