Why I'm a loser & I don't know what to do to fix it...

by Billy the Ex-Bethelite 104 Replies latest members private

• 

  BreakingAway

  Well whaddya know.. you've got TWO pages already.I actually like Billy's avatar.Anywho, I feel for you Billy, I really do.The thing is, this website is full of people who can completely relate to how you feel.I personally gave up the youngest, and potentially best, years of my life...and all because I truly believed I was doing the right thing.I felt that if God really had done so much for man and who was going to do yet even more, including granting eternal life , then putting my life on hold temporarily wouldn't be that much of a problem.But I was wrong !

  When I examined the Org closely, I came to realize that it was all a sham ! I spent nearly 20 years as a Witness for something that turned out to be a lie.I gave up lucrative job offers, my health was seriously affected from pushing myself excessively by trying to be a good elder and run my business, turned down relationships with "worldly" women and never got married, my Dad died while being disappointed that I was a Witness and I never even got to say goodbye, and much more.

  Sadly, we can't change the past.But we can change whether or not we want to STAY THERE.If all we look at is where we WERE we will never see where we're GOING or where we could BE.Despite my regrets about being a Witness there still are some good things I can take away.I'm a better communicator, I deal with people better,study skills improved, networking ability, more responsible, more empathetic, etc, etc.Over the years we may have acquired more skills or qualities than we realize.Tap into your true potential, take a good look at what you really learned and apply that to where you want to go.

  You're a smart guy, you've got skills, you have the ability to accomplish the things you want to do...please don't let the past hold you back.The remaining years you have may far outweigh what you gave up.Some people are born with severe handicaps, or they live in a poor country with little to no opportunites, but by contrast, the sheer number of opportunities we have here can be overwhelming.Sometimes the hardest part is figuring out just what it is you really want to do.Your experiences at Bethel, and your time as a Witness, can help others to cope with what they've been through and all indicators are that there are far more that are going to leave the Org, they'll need support too.We all really are in this together.I'm confident that you will get beyond this Billy and have peace of mind.
• 

  jamiebowers

  But what's the point of trying again when I've already failed twice.

  So, by any chance were both tries related to being a jw? Maybe picking up and leaving behind all jw ties would be a good idea...at least for awhile. Failure isn't bad, it's a learning experience. And as awful as being in the organization is, it is part of what makes you who you are. That's true for most of us here. Sending you a pm.
• 

  oompa

  Ok...i am sooo pissed right now.....I just spent an hour on this poor losers thread.....dissecting it...highlighting all the goodies.....and leaving________________________blank spaces for you to fill in to help/shred him. My best work ever.....and not only does it not post.....it flukkin disappears!!!!!!!!!!!....sooo dammit you are a loser and cursed to boot....lol

  it was dammm good billy...YOU have the power was in it....READ YOUR OWN SUBJECT LINE!!!!........you know EXACTLY WHAT YOUR FOLKS AND FRIENDS will think and do cause THEY are TOLD everything to think and do...USE THAT....a huge advantage....but dude they ain't got a clue about a real brain....use that....if you SHUT DOWN...to JW crap...and ya...you need to do MUCH LESS FAST!!!!....not only does it suck...esp if you know it to be a lie...and now you are soooooo stressed and depressed....but they CAN NOT abandon you!!!!...use the fluck out of that advice....my first post was sooooo much better and thorough dammit............oompa

  pm me...i have skills...and don't worry.. not gay....first thread also mentioned that all that time at bethel at least teaches you new ways to hide the jizzz hahaha....but prob a lot more...and you still have your youth and oh.....damm...I gotta go back and show you this on this redo...

  me thinks sweetface is about to take your pain away..hee hee
• 

  compound complex

  Hi Billy,

  I'm sorry for your grief, really, I am. While another's story may or may not help you, I'll give it a shot.

  I had the privilege of telling Brooklyn what I gave up to serve Jehovah - college and a career 10-years-in-the-planning. Other Bethel brothers and I had the privilege of setting up new foreign language congregations throughout the boroughs. We even traveled to New Jersey and upstate New York, bringing The Truth to those hungering for the message of God's true servants in their own tongue. We had the privilege of working alongside the writing department on publications pivotal to the salvation of those righteously disposed toward everlasting life. I had the inestimable privilege of meeting Brothers Knorr and Franz (Frederick).

  I loved Bethel and my congregation and gave it my all ...

  I had a nervous breakdown.

  Forty years later, I am recovered, largely due to JWD.

  If I can make it, well then...?

  A new friend,

  CoCo
• 

  Farkel

  B the X,

  It's been said that the best way to get rid of a problem is to get a bigger problem. Say someone lost his job and home and became homeless. That is certainly a big problem. Then that person found out he had six months to live. Being homeless doesn't sound like such a big problem when one then finds out he only has six months to live.

  So to solve your "loser" problem, get a bigger one! Go back to Bethel! Go out in service for 4 hours every day! THEN you will think your current life is heaven!

  Remember, there is no shortage of problems in the world, but people think there is. That is why they hang on tightly to the ones they have! Get new ones! There's lots to go around!

  Just a thought.

  Farkel
• 

  Homerovah the Almighty

  Oh contair Billy your a winner and a big one too, you left a mind numbing damaging destructive cult

  in the eyes of the general public your a big winner.... why ? you own own your own mind and doesn't belong to anyone else to manipulate for starts
• 

  chrisjoel

  My two cents

  Looks matter dude...they fucking matter..without question They Matter. But confidence building is priority. You re a nerd buddy. So the first thing is to do something like getting involved in martial arts. Build your confidence. Nothing feels as good as knowing you can defend yourself. Start watching UFC whenever you can. Your looks and demeanor will change when you have built confidence. You will have the same look but a confidence that goes with it and that makes you more appealing to others and yourself. As soon as you have someone in your life that adores you other than your family .....Anyways changing your lifestyle to build it around respect is what martial arts can do. You already are smart. Inject yourself with the right poison.The poison of confidence. Not alcohol not weed ....confidence. Respect everything that moves and breathes.
• 

  sweetface2233

  See Billy, it could be so much worse. You could have an old, tipsy, neurotic hunchback trying to pimp you out to other JWD posters. Count your blessings!
• 

  Hope4Others

  Well you've certainly made your two pages....that means you are not a loser...

  We all love you...your funny and witty, things will get better. Hang in there!

  hope4others
• 

  yknot

  We all have moments like this, and it too shall pass.