As a JW were you ever counseled about clothes you wore, or lack thereof ?

by flipper 125 Replies latest jw friends

  • calico
    calico

    John Doe said:

    I was pulled aside and counseled for dressing "too modest," that my perfect dress might make the ones dressing inappropriately feel bad.

    I remember a couple of sisters who were counselled for being "too put together" in other words they looked great! Nice dress--matching shoes and purse and nice makeup. They were told that they were spending too much time on their dress! CAN'T WIN, HUH!

  • Namaste
    Namaste

    Surprisingly I never was, maybe because I was overly "blessed" in the female chest department they knew that saying anything would have meant being obvious about looking. My small rebellion was just letting the cleavage out to breath some days

    This thread reminded me of something though. About 15 years ago I visited Australia, my friend and I ended up staying with a family in Alice Springs and the mom told us how she "refused" to wear pantyhose/nylons even when she had an assembly part. We literally could not wrap our minds around this fact. I was amazed......

    1) That she could "refuse" to do something

    2) That she didn't follow the dress code that the rest of the witnesses in the world did (mmhmm...right, guess I should have put a little more thought into that one at the time) and she wasn't "punished" for it.

    3) That I hauled my 2 sets of nylons/dress shoes/meeting clothes all the way to Australia and NZ along with my meeting books

    Looking back, oh the ridiculousness of it all and how sad that at 25 I was allowing myself and my world to be controlled by such pettiness.

  • Wordly Andre
    Wordly Andre

    I use to be kind of Punk in High School starting when I was about 13, first it was my t-shirts, I had Bauhaus, Sex Pistols, The Jesus and Marychain, Black Flag, Dead Kennedys, etc. Then it was my Paratrooper boots, and leather jacket. Then they told me I had to cut my hair, they would come over to tell my dad that I looked like Demons dressed me and that it was not how young JW youth should look. My dad would beat the shit out of me, over it but I wasn't going to look like some JW fucking Sears best looser! it was a constant fight but in the end I kept my style.

  • gaiagirl
    gaiagirl

    Over the years, I was counseled for: no pantyhose too much eyeliner black nail polish on fingers and toes sundresses which exposed arms and shoulders skirts too short, too tight, or both slacks not appropriate Doc Martens boots not appropriate Dr. Scholls sandals not appropriate

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    yup.. I attended a congregation picnic in shorts they believed were too short.. (ok and they had a small slit up the side too)..

    a sister in the congregation told them that her and her husband had to leave the picnic early because they offended them... so the elders had to come talk to me of course about it.. I should dig out a picture from that picnic and show you the shorts..

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    I'm pretty sure it's the policy of the U.S. Branch (not positive though) that brothers giving the public talk WILL WEAR SUITS, not sport coats. Now my public talk giving days are a thing of the past, but if I was gonna give it one last shot, I think I would comply with the direction from The Slave and show up wearing this if I could find matching pants.
    Whatta ya think? Would the elders in your old congo allow me up on stage?

    Open Mind

    PS: Ok, I give up on trying to post photos. Just Google "plaid suit" and you'll get the idea.

  • brunnhilde
    brunnhilde

    I'm pretty sure you're right, OM. I know that a little over a year ago my husband had to go home and change from a sports coat and slacks to a suit so he could give an impromptu Sunday talk at our Kingdumb hall and that happened in other congs we were in from Utah to Oregon to Washington.

    brunn

  • Crafty Lady
    Crafty Lady

    Finally-Free

    #2 through #6 sound like a great outfit to me. Just leave off the tie though.

    I don't know if this was really counsel but one of the elders wives didn't like how my skirt was hemmed--the stitches were too big and showed too much. I kid you not! She offered to show me how to hem a skirt properly.

    The witlesses just make everyone so petty. In the real world how many people would dare to critique someone's appearance under the guise of "loving counsel"? They took that bit about not stumbling someone to a ridiculous degree. So, if one person didn't like the color purple, I'm never supposed to wear purple again so they aren't stumbled? Get over it.

  • Insomniac
    Insomniac

    I got in trouble for being too goth. Totally black wardrobe, black eyeliner, naturally black hair. Hey, at least my skirts were well below my knees!

  • Frequent_Fader_Miles
    Frequent_Fader_Miles
    I remember a couple of sisters who were counselled for being "too put together" in other words they looked great! Nice dress--matching shoes and purse and nice makeup. They were told that they were spending too much time on their dress! CAN'T WIN, HUH!

    OOOOhhh ... If I didn't know better, I'd think you were describing my congo! I was always hounded for that very reason! One time they even threw in the "materialistic" label just for the fun of it. Can you say ...... J E A L O U S ....

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