Miss you Juni.
little hamster rat "Ricky Bobby"
Philip
My Andy was in a bad car accident~
by FlyingHighNow 471 Replies latest members private
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PEC
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FlyingHighNow
Please take my best wishes that things may turn out better. Sorry for not finding better words. :-( It is so sad that one day can change everything.
GXW, Your words, no matter how inept you think they are, and this goes for GoingGoingGone and anyone afraid to comment for similar reasons, your words are comforting. When I've been through the most painful times in my life, just knowing that my family or I mattered so much to others was a saving grace. It cannot always take away the pain, but it does lessen it to a degree. You are so right, one day can change everything. At least no one has died. I take a comfort in that. Now that the zoloft is kicking in, I'm getting back my perspective and I am able to enjoy some blocks of time. I cannot believe what a difference a week has made in my case. Last week, I thought I would die from a broken heart and fear for the future. Today? I have hope again and can deal much better with the grief and loss. Juni, Ricky Bobby (rat.....PEC, you are tooooo funny) is doing well. He's a good little guy who doesn't take big chomps on your finger. I turned on the light of Julian's bedroom, only to find him standing straight up. I got him out, but he got spazzy and tried to escape, so I had to put him back in his cage. I wish I had a playpen for him, so he could get some exercise. He doesn't like the wheel in his cage, he's really too big for it. He's curled up snoozing now. The drive to Newaygo was beautiful. Very tranquil. You drive through rolling hills past farms and apple orchards for the longest part of the trip. I was able to really enjoy it. The little towns are picturesque. The weather was perfect. There was a rain coming on, so it was windy and balmy. The camp had a peaceful, serene spirit, idyllic really. We waited for Julian on a bench in from of the office, overlooking the gorgeous lake. We told the girl, that went to find him, to tell him it was good news, so he wouldn't worry. When Julian came, he already radiated peace and calm. He looked a little puzzled. We told him the news about CPS and the look of relief that spread over his face was amazing, a true gift. Then he gave the sweetest, most secure smile. He said, "Awesome. alright." We hugged him and told him Mother Val, one of the most beloved of his friends, had insisted we let him know right away. We also told him about Mickey. Mickey is staying with what Connecticut calls a theraputic foster family, a step up from a regular one. They are very experienced in helping children like Mickey. They live on a farm, with all kinds of animals including horses. The family has two or three of their own children, one younger than Mickey. They also have two children that they have adopted. The caseworker said Mickey colored in his Spiderman coloring book at the airport until they left. And dug in his back pack we had packed for him. She said he was good on the trip, but asked a lot of questions and insisted they let his Nanna know where he was. He had a meltdown when they got there though, because it all hit him. He was upset about going to the foster home. But she says he is adjusting. We can write to him or send him things in care of her. She will wait and see about phone calls. I asked if she could take a picture of him and send it. She said she will be taking a picture of him for her records. I asked if she would please take it with some of the animals, for Julian and his mother's sake. She said she would try to take the picture with the horses. I asked if she would send our love and take an e-mail to him. She said yes. I talked to her about my daughter and her planned visit here and her interest in Mickey. I hope Carrie will be strong enough to speak with the caseworker. She would like to go see Mickey when she returns to New England. I think that would be very comforting if she could. So, even though Mickey isn't with us, at least we know he is in capable, caring hands, in a very good environment. That does bring comfort of a certain meaure. So lets all pray that he continues to be in a good place and that he can have peace. Maybe God is looking out for him afterall.
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bikerchic
We also told him about Mickey. Mickey is staying with what Connecticut calls a theraputic foster family, a step up from a regular one. They are very experienced in helping children like Mickey. They live on a farm, with all kinds of animals including horses. The family has two or three of their own children, one younger than Mickey. They also have two children that they have adopted.
FHN it sounds like Mikey is in a good place. It will take time for him to adjust but he'll be okay. It will be nice for all of you when you can communicate with him, I hope it's soon.
Hugs!
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FlyingHighNow
Oh yes, it started raining as we left. A nice, summer shower. Needed the wipers and lights. We had to stop for food because it was time for meds, which have to be taken with food. We kept it light though. We stopped at a local restaurant, a very rare thing for us anymore, a restaurant. Cory's est. 1970. Everything was very reasonably priced and delicious. Even the fruit punch I had, they were "fresh out of lemon-aid" was made from scratch. It had a tropical taste, including coconut. Andy had an olive burger and slaw and I had a chicken burrito with salsa. So if you go to Newaygo, don't be afraid to eat there.
The pace up there is much slower. The people were relaxed and pleasant and smiled as they talked. I never thought of Grand Rapids as a rat race place, having lived in much bigger, busier cities, but we could see the difference, it was palpable. Some little girl kept singing Happy Birthday to her mother and when she finished, we all applauded.
I forgot, on the way up, we drove past a wreck. There were several, beautifully restored 50's model cars parked along the road. One policeman. A downed motorcycle. Andy said the rider was conscious. We had to keep pulling over for police cars and a fire truck. One of the squad cars passed the firetruck. Go figure.
The drive back was fun. I started singing "Goin' out the country, baby do you wanna go?" in that falsetto Canned Heat way. Andy laughed and joined in. Then he started singing Canned Heat's On the Road Again. We changed the words. Then we proceeded to sing, or attempt to sing, the soundtrack from Woodstock and a few Neil Young songs. I think the only Woodstock song we remotely knew all the words to was Pinball Wizard.
I only used a quarter of a tank of gas.
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FlyingHighNow
Just a note to say Andy's doctor visit went well today. It's so quiet around here without the kids. Julian will be back Saturday though.
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FlyingHighNow
Hi, everyone. Checking in. Today was my first day back at work. Everyone was glad to see me, which was nice. Thank goodness we were unusually slow. I kept my speed up to almost normal. My drawer was accurate. I got tired a couple of times, but when you work 8 hours, you get three breaks adding up to an hour. And they let me go half an hour early. I'm glad to be home.
Andy had his interview with the SSI disability lady today. It looks like he will get it. It won't start until December or January, but it's hope on the horizon. He should get some back months, so all in and all, if we can hold on to our apartment and get by until then, we'll be okay. He was very relieved and in a good frame of mind when I got home tonight. He said he had a good cry while I was gone, for Mickey. Crying is good to ease grief. He's had so many losses in the past two months. And tomorrow will make one month since Mickey left us.
We pick Julian up at 12:15 tomorrow. I know it will be anit-climactic for him. But his mother, my daughter Carrie will be coming to visit for a couple of days this week. And he'll get to go to EYC, again on full scholarship, in August. I am very grateful to people who send kids like Julian to camp. I always thought only kids whose parents were well off got to go to camp. When you are raising grandchildren, people step in and offer them all kinds of opportunities. He was involved in the mentoring program through school, as was Mickey. This week Julian's mentor is coming to take him to the park and for ice cream. Julian was part of Treck Quest, a program that trained boys to run the 5k. He went two days a week afterschool for two months. They gave him a pair of running shoes and a t-shirt and water bottle. He did very well in the 5k and wasn't tired out by it at all. All but two of the boys said they were never going to do it again. Julian was one of the two.
Ricky Bobby Cornflower. I tried putting him in a big rectangular laundry basket today, so he could run around safely. The critter proceeded to chew his way out. Luckily I looked up just in time to see him squeezing through the basket on his way to certain escape. I also tied some pot holder loops in the rungs of the basket, and he ate one. It's in his cheek pouch. I hope he doesn't choke on it. I'd feel terrible if he did.
Again, profound thanks to all of you for your ongoing encouragement, love, prayers, good thoughts, support and gifts. You are lifesavers. Maybe someday, when it's all settled, I'll explain the many ways you have helped.
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FlyingHighNow
bttt so you can see last night's update. Julian is home now. He's fine. I'm heading off to work. Take care everyone.
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Sad emo
(((FHN))) sounds like you have a good place to work. I bet you can't wait to get home to catch up on everything Julian did at camp!
Maybe it's a good thing in a way that the work is tiring - you'll get better quality, more restful sleep? That's how I find it sometimes.
take good care of each other, unity=strength
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FlyingHighNow
Well, we found the potholder loop in Ricky Bobby's cage this morning. I guess he spit it out during the night. Thank goodness.
Julian really loved camp. He was soaking wet when he got off the bus, 1/2 an hour late, and so was all of his gear. He wanted to just sleep and hang out around here today. He said some of the boys in his cabin were gangsta types and he had to defend himself a few times. He still said he had a good time though.
Other than feeling a little jittery this morning, I have been good today. I didn't feel sad at all. That's a milestone for me. I know it doesn't mean the grieving and sadness are over and done, but it's encouraging. I think I'm going to go to St. Mark's in the morning. I have not been for the last two Sundays. I just couldn't bear being around a lot of people at the time.
Andy had a good day today, too. He said he wasn't depressed either. I hope we have more days like these from now on.
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GoingGoingGone
Soooo glad to hear that things are going well right now!
I tried putting him in a big rectangular laundry basket today, so he could run around safely. The critter proceeded to chew his way out. Luckily I looked up just in time to see him squeezing through the basket on his way to certain escape.
Have you ever seen those clear plastic balls that they sell at pet stores for mice and other little critters? They are about the size of a basketball.... Open ball, put animal inside, close ball, animal is trapped inside. Put ball with enclosed critter on the floor, and when it runs, the whole ball rolls all over the house! It's really cool, the people who's house we had the book study at had one for their guinea pig. The guinea pig loved the ball, it zoomed all over the house when it got in there. Really freaked the dog out, though!
GGG