I'm going to be disfellowshipped on Wednesday

by Thinking of Leaving 75 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  IP_SEC

  Congratulations on that and good luck with being free of the JWs!
• 

  Highlander

  I'm not df'd and it appears that i won't be despite my newfound reputation as an apostate,, however my family(100 relatives) has already shunned me as of 4.12.2007 so I would like

  to give you a heads up on how it felt for me.

  The first few days was very, very emotional and sad for me. I did a lot of crying during those first days. At about the 5th day I reach a very angry mentality, but that lasted for only

  one day. At the 7th day I became indifferent to the whole ordeal. Now, only 11 days after, I am at peace and actually very comfortable and content with everything. I feel as if a

  weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel very much at peace.

  Ofcourse your reaction could be quite different then mine. I only hope that it goes smoothly for you.

  Be sure to use your friends and loved ones that will talk to you as support. Be sure to talk to us and let us know how you feel and how everything is. We are here to support you.

  I wish you the best.
• 

  ferret

  Do they not believe in Canada's Privacy Act. Why are they telling your sister confidential stuff like that.

  I definitely would ask them that, and ask for a written apology. Man they've got their nerve.
• 

  Scully

  Do they not believe in Canada's Privacy Act. Why are they telling your sister confidential stuff like that.

  I guess they only maintain confidentiality when they know someone is a pedophile.
• 

  JamesThomas

  Dear Thinking,

  Though it may not seem so, it's a time for celebration. One way of celebrating is to be kind, gentle and aware of the internal dynamics such a situation can bring on.

  Silently and gently meet with the inner sorrow of losing what the Witness gave you. It is a kind of death. Know that they are not "demons", but simply people lost in a story; a story which says that disfellowshipping you is the right thing to do. No need to make enemies here, for this will only cause you pain and suffering.

  I suggest clearly seeing that the mind will want to weave a grand drama around this situation; one easily lost in. You'll know you are lost in the story when the body is tight and the emotions full of angst. Respect these signs, heed them, and step out of the minds drama and into the cool-warm reality of the moment of life in and around you void of a story.

  There is a freedom which comes with disfellowshipment. Freedom can be a little scary. Be aware, and do not allow yourself to step out of one jail cell and into another religious belief system.

  Don't allow others, or some book to define life's ultimate significance. Take this time to learn what it is to be silently alive and one with the entire flow of existence in and around you. You carry within you all that wisdom you will ever need.

  Congratulations!

  j
• 

  Thinking of Leaving

  well actually, they called the house a few times, I never answered the phone, they left messages and I never returned their calls. They set up a judicial committee and I never went to the meeting. So they came to the house on Saturday morning (ofcourse they were out on service) and asked to speak with me. Normally I work Saturday mornings, but this Sat. I didn't. They have probably been driving by for weeks looking for my car. They happened to see it parked in front of the house and rang the bell. They asked to speak with me, my sister came and told me, I told her I don't want to see them. She went and relayed the message and they told her "tell her they just want one minute of her time", she came again to me (this time very angry with me for not speaking with them) and I told her I am not going to talk to them. That's when they gave her the message.

  I guess I was selfish and let my sister, who isn't a JW, do the dirty work. She got over it anyhow and wasn't as angry as I thought. I just couldn't bare the thought of seeing them. This is hard. I saw one of my good friends, a JW, in the grocery store on Saturday and she waved at me, barely acknowledged me and I saw another "sister" and I told her about going to be DF. I looked at her and she had tears in her eyes. I guess I should be the one shedding tears for her, she's suffered from depression for years being in this religion. Most of the "sisters" from my hall were depressed. And to top it off, I heard the first guy I ever loved got engaged....what a weekend

  Thanks for your comments and encouragement everyone. I am beginning to taste that freedom and it feels heavenly!
• 

  ninja

  you can now name yourself ..."told you I was thinking of leaving..now I have"...yay...name change...its the start of good things for you...onwards and upwards....da ninja
• 

  Thinking of Leaving

  Now the hard part, how do I tell my co-worker, who is a JW, that I'm going to be DF sighhhhh, I think she will be very surprised
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Now the hard part, how do I tell my co-worker, who is a JW, that I'm going to be DF sighhhhh, I think she will be very surprised

  You have to work. You don't want a difficult work environment. Don't tell her. If she finds out, then
  acknowledge it. "Why didn't you tell me?" "It's unimportant. It's not work-related and it's not changed
  who I am."

  If something at work blows up in your face, you can either get a lawyer or get her fired. I know you
  don't want to get a friend fired, so try to ignore what happened at the KH.
• 

  bubble

  Congratulations, trust me being disfellowshipped is the best thing that can happen to you. I'm talking from experience as I was df'd in 2002. It's hard at first but the freedom that follows far outweighs the bad stuff.