by Cabin in the woods 112 Replies latest jw friends
I did, and its fantastic the second time round. I think i learnt so much from the first marriage that this marriage is a breeze, and of course it helps when you marry someone that actually loves you and wants to be with you and take care of you.
Its the best thing i could have ever done
es
The jury's out on this one.
I've been divorced a year now, separated for over a year before that, and lonely in my marriage for years before that. With my recent breast cancer, I'm shy about the thought of getting into bed with someone again -- even though I've only had a lumpectomy.
I don't plan on even beginning the dating game for a few years more, because I think my youngest child needs to be comfortable with his own sexuality before he will be comfortable with Mom's sexuality,
Also, my ex- is behaving very badly about living up to the terms of our divorce agreement, and it makes me very anxious at the thought of merging finances with anyone again.
That said, I am optimistic that there IS a man out there somewhere who will be delighted with the person I am and whom I will find delight in return and that we will be able to build a loving, joyful relationship based on mutual respect, shared interests and caring attitudes that will last until death does us part.
I don't see marriage as the only kind of commitment a couple can make to each other. To me, marriage is a legal contract. It has nothing to do with commitment. About half of all legal marriage ends in divorce. What happened to the commitment in those marriages that ended in divorce?
To be sure, under certain circumstances, marriage offers you legal rights and benefits you won't otherwise get. On the other hand, I've learned that when there is no legal marriage contract, it can become much clearer how true your commitment is. I find that not having a legal contract makes it very clear to me why I am staying. I am not staying out of a sense of duty: I am staying because I truly love Andy and I want to stay.
I think people should live with each other first, keeping all their finances separate. Then if it works out and they are in love and want to marry, THEN SET THE DATE.
This way you get to really know one another and see how the other reacts to challenging moments.
I did. I lived with my boyfriend for three years until I felt ready to marry him last year. By then I knew he was genuine. He was always loving and kind to me. And to his mom too! (I thought that was a good sign)
He put up with my post JW dfing tears and tried to dry them. He is the one who found this site for me!
I saw how he treated my little dogs and cat----very kind. (Nuther good sign) Girls, after living with him for 3 years and now being married for one, he still comes around and opens the car door for me and helps me in the car AND opens the house door for me and lets me in first (in case there is a knife wielding robber!)
AND Did I tell you girls I married a much younger man too????
Why not? He proved himself very mature for a 35 YEAR OLD!!!!
He was one of those nice guys the worldly chicks these days overlook I guess.
He is good looking, goes to work, likes to cuddle, likes to brush my long hair and rub my legs and feet.
I mean, whats not to love here folks! I'd be crazy to pass up such a sweet person.
Im sure many of the swell guys on JWD are just as wonderful and loving.
Im sure of it!
Its so nice to have a husband who is also a best friend. Crazy about me the way I am. No bullshyte, no games, no torment, just honest straightshooting supportive loving friendship AND LOTS OF SMOOCHING----OH MY YES!!!
Find someone you are very comfortable with, who likes you as you are, would even still like you if you were a little fatter, and who makes you smile or laugh, who you respect and are proud to be with.
And someone who likes alot of the same things you do. Thats so fun if you share similar tastes.
Ok Ive blabbed enough!
Great thread Cab!
Anewme
If I am divorced or widowed, I would never remarry - I'd just fornicate.
After my 1st marriage to a Mormon never again.
Had a conversation with an elder just this past week; he was talking about the next Mrs. Elderette.
It appears that his current wife doesn't meet his intellectual expectations.
Oh well, Jehovah will provide all those that earnestly seek him.
Terry,I am currently going through a divorcecongrats,
Gee, I never thought of it like that, thanks!
Gee, I never thought of it like that, thanks!
Your Welcome............
I know you were not very happy and did way more than your part.
purps
Serendipity, another definition of SNAGs .. senile, neurotic, ageing geeks.
Hi Robdar, you speak beautiful truths.
I like this "In time, the infatuation and lust will pass. It has too. Still, it can last up to 10 years. It's the friendship that should develop during this time that will help it last a life time."
I've been married twice and lived with someone. Now I've been with my partner for 10 yrs. We live separately, two houses, and 6 kids between us. Some grown, some teens. We spend time together then go to our respective homes for a break. We may eventually live together, probably not marry legally. More time will tell what will take place.
Witchettygrub
