Darl, I have so many things to say to you but have to rush off to work today. I'm going to reply to many things you've said, so don't run away! I have a big lump in my heart reading things you say, especially when you talk about the cutting... I wish I could be your big sis and help you out of the mess that's in your head love.
if you are disfellowshiped you are able to be forgiven and come back. Her husband broke in and started talking about (serious sins) like adultry and if I would want to continue talking to my husband if he cheated on me. I told him NO and he made his point there
...Yep you can 'repent' and come back, but what if you've come to a place where you just can't accept it as truth anymore? You can't go back then, and you'll never see your loved ones again. Or what if it's your husband who decides that he can't? Or your children? Would you want to shun them?
she just said if people forgive and are really sad about what they did they can come back
... hey I've forgiven, and I'm really sad, but it would take me about a year of going to the meetings while being shunned, and then I would have to write many letters filled with blood and tears about how repentant I am, and when they decide that I've expressed enough misery I'd have to face a committee of six elders (I've moved across town so the committee would be the three who disfellowshipped me and three from my current cong)... That meeting would be an exam on whether I meet their standards. I wouldn't pass it, because when they ask me what's more important to me, their organisation and my husband, I'd have to answer my husband. I couldn't lie, and so all that effort would be for nothing.
They downplay the cruelties of their faith early on. If you join up, you will learn about it over time, but you'll become one of the people who can't see any cruelty in that.
She made it seem though, as though it should be the congregation (not the individual person) who ignores the member who sinned. She never said the whole congregation should ignore the person who sins, but seemed to imply it.
... Not just the elders and the entire congregation, but every witness friend and family member you have. And as you don't have any non-witness friends and you've ignored your non-witness family all your life, that's every relationship you've ever had. And it's not just at the hall - it's everywhere you go.
I just do not understand, if it is "the faithful and descreet slave" Who are you to judge God?
The faithful and discreet slave aren't God, they're just guys. If you think otherwise, they've got you good.
Please do not give me any watchtower quotes. My father already saw me looking at this site (non JW) and if he found out their were opposers to the religion he might talk to me about NOT joining.
Can you see that it's because he loves you and would be concerned that he'd be losing you? Don't you think your father might want to protect you? And why do you not want to hear it anyway? If you were buying a second-hand car, wouldn't you want to see the old service manual? Or talk to a former owner? That's the old literature, and us... we've been there, we've been what you are becoming.
There's something they'll never tell you, and that is that the journey to understanding God is a lifetime one... even your 'name' tells you that... All my life they told me that 'we' were on the narrow path to everlasting life and 'everybody else' was following the big wide comfy road to destruction. Can you see that it doesn't matter which organisation or group of people you'd hooked up with, they'd all have told you that?
I just... I want to understand, but... I am confused at what is truth. Or maybe I am just blocking you out... because I am scared that I will give into what you say. I don't want others telling me what is right.
Why is it okay for witnesses to tell you what is right but not ex-witnesses or people whose family have become witnesses and have seen what it has done to them?
But honestly... Jehovah God has his reasons. SURE the Elders are in the decision, but they are higher athurioty.
The elders who disfellowshipped me were a janitor, a window-washer and a carpet cleaner. God did not make that decision; three cleaners did. God had absolutely nothing to do with it, and you need to stop that process from happening; you need to stop thinking that humans can represent God. NO human represents God or makes decisions on god's behalf. That is one of the biggest lies they're telling you, and they will be judged for that.
It's good that you're questioning things, and it's vitally important that you never let yourself stop. The harder it becomes, and the more you feel that doing so is insulting Jehovah, the more effective their control over you is becoming. It's uncomfortable to think of it as 'brainwashing' because we all like to think that we're in control of our own choices. Unfortunately some groups focus their efforts on those whose 'heart condition' is right; the witnesses think that they're searching for the deserving and the loving, but in reality witnesses are just constantly rejected by the doubtful so they go for those who are in a weak place in their life. You're prime beef to them. I'm sorry hon but you must be realistic about the place your head has been for a while.
Do you really think that God is so weak and gutless that he needs people and an organisation to do his work for him? And that questioning or doubting those people is the same as doubting him? Because my God is infinitely bigger than that, and you just haven't noticed yet.
