It Seems That My Children Are Not Trained

by Gary1914 128 Replies latest jw friends

  • Effervescent

    I guarantee from general personal experience that the "publishers" who complained don't have children.

  • jgnat

    Oh, and if they try and backtrack and try and "encourage" you to remain and reform, be insistent that you took the counsel in the spirit in which it was given, and insist that you resign.

    Your poor wife. Three children underfoot, and no doubt she has been trying very hard. Give her a hug from me.

  • Scully

    Your children are just fine; they are normal children. The elders who expect them to sit like little stone statues for 2 hours are the ones who are fcked up.

    Expecting children to sit through a mindlessly boring meeting for 2 hours is cruel ... to some children it's practically torture. To punish them for it is insane.

    You have some choices to make. I hope you choose for your childrens' best interests, because the organization will never thank you for choosing in its best interests. If they can get you to ignore your childrens' best interests over something this ludicrous, they'll be able to get you to make similar decisions when your kids really need you in their corner. Don't give them an inch.

    A few years ago we got to know a family in the neighbourhood who were in the French congregation at the same KH we were assigned to (but we've never attended meetings there). I found out that the little girl, who was a normal fidgety kid, was on Ritalin, because the elders had complained to the parents that she wasn't sitting still at meetings and told them that maybe "she needed something to calm her down". A year or so later, we happened to see them again, and the little girl announced that they were having Halloween and Christmas now because they stopped being JWs. And she didn't need Ritalin anymore. I was so angry with those elders!!! Imagine DRUGGING a child to make them behave at the KH....

    When my children were small we were constantly being counselled about them being fidgety. Mr Scully was basically told that he wouldn't be appointed to MS unless the children could sit still through all the meetings. It made going to the meetings pure hell for all of us.

  • skyman

    I have been there but on the other side. Why in the world would a body of Elders take care of this the way yours did. Put out of the group inorder to make you aware you are the problem. This is acting in a loving way at all. Who it should of been handled was to briefly mention it to you and if that did not work to talk to you privately never like the way they did. What this tells me is you have a very intolarant Elder Body that is unloving and demanding. Watch out!!!

  • garybuss

    They want you to abuse your children and call it discipline. The Jehovah's Witnesses had the same talk with my parents and they followed directions. Life was hell for my brother and I. Meetings were torture and punishment.

    Do your kids a favor and get them out of that mess. They don't deserve what's coming.

  • These3Words

    15 years out of that cult and to this day I still have issues. After years of therapy and medications. Your children need YOU to stand up for them!! No one else will


  • Billygoat

    ((((Gary1914)))) I am so sorry. Your children are very normal. It's the elders who are not. I really wonder why the elders don't follow the bible's instructions when there is an issue with someone. The scriptures say to take the brother aside privately. Being ganged up on by the elder body is ridiculous in my opinion and a gross misuse of their leadership. One brother could not have spoken on behalf of all of them? Why the need to humiliate you in front of your peers? Yeah, I can see Jesus doing that.

  • Aude_Sapere
    My wife cried for a while but she is okay now. The kids are napping.

    I wonder why she cried...

    Is she concerned about the added stress that will be placed on her to be the perfect mother with perfect babydoll children?

    Or she is concerned about her own potential loss of status within the congregation?

    Or is she feeling guilty that her 'inadequate' parenting style is jeopardizing your position and that she is therfore letting you down??

    Please know that I consider this to be bunk and am in no way criticizing. Just wondering where her emotions and thoughts are.

    And, it was, in my opinion, appalling for you to be the sole focus of the impromptu elders meeting. Rude to put you on the spot like that.


  • lisavegas420

    Did they happen to have any suggestions to keep your children from acting like children? I was told that my children was interupting...I got up went to the back and kept on walking.


  • These3Words

    For an organization who says to walk in the footsteps of Christ, I think they have gone of the beaten path. Put on your Sunday best! And Tuesday and Thursday Oh Yeah and service in beetween.

Share this