It Seems That My Children Are Not Trained

by Gary1914 128 Replies latest jw friends

  • cyber-sista
    cyber-sista
    There was always the pressure to conform to a standard that none of us can ever live up to. Is it any wonder why so many Witnesses are suffering from mental illness?








    cybs

  • FreeWilly
    FreeWilly

    **Bing** bing** bing** bing!

    Congratulations Gary, YOU WIN!

    You see, the Watchtower Society is actually a top secret CIA experiment in social manipulation. One day we will use these methods to assemble an army of simpletons and rule the world. Bwu haa ha ha haaa!

    The challenge: To see how much free time and obedience we can suck outa people.

    The Methods: A combination of wavering teachings, guilt and fear of doomsday.

    The prize for figuring out this is no way to live? YOU GET YOUR LIFE BACK !!! Enjoy, God knows you've earned it.

  • Gary1914
    Gary1914

    Our

  • desbah
    desbah

    Gary,

    Your thread is interesting that so many people responded with excellent advice for you. They care about you and your young family and the burden you are under. The statement you made about;

    The PO said, there are some publishers wondering why your children are not trained.

    caught my attention. Gary, you are not being treated with RESPECT the PO has no right to say this about your family. Please learn from others who have been through painful experiences to leave this religious cult.

    ~desbah~

  • hartstrings
    hartstrings

    Gary, I was wondering how things went last night. I was thinking about you and your family.

    Warm thoughts,

    HS

  • Gary1914
    Gary1914

    I tried to post this last night but was unable to. So.......

    Our

    Well, I told him that I really felt that I needed to spend more time with my family and that with the added stress of being an elder, I did not have much time for anything anymore. They nodded their heads all the time I was speaking. I was thinking how easy this was and I had worried all day for nothing.

    When I finished talking the other elder leaned forward and asked what was really the problem. I again told them that I felt I had just too much on my plate at the time and that I wanted to step down as an elder.

    The other elder again leaned forward and asked if there was anything going on in my life that they needed to hear about, and the pulled his Bible out of his bookbag.

    The reminded me how eager I was to become an elder and how proud I was to be appointed so young. I was just 20 when I was appointed. I told him that life changes, people change and the appointment of elder did not seem nearly so important to me as it once did. I was now married and had children and there were more important things for me now to consider.

    The other elder said that there was nothing more important than Jehovah and his organization and that this should be my first priority. I corrected him and said that my family was my first priority and he said no, Jehovah’s organization was my first priority. What?

    He looked as if he was daring me to contradict him again. I didn’t say anything. I am a laid back, easygoing guy and I certainly didn’t want to get into an argument with him.

    I told them no, there was nothing going on that they needed to know about and that I was just tired. The PO said that all the brothers and sisters were tired at this time of the end but that we all had to hold on just a little while longer until Jehovah brought in his new order. Then he read that scripture “and just a little while longer and the wicked one will be no more……….blah, blah, blah…… Then they asked me how my wife felt about my stepping down. I thought to myself if they had not dismissed her, she could have told them herself. But I told them that she said the decision was up to me.

    He asked if this had anything to do with our talk about the children the other night. I admitted that this talk had made me think about the direction in which my life was going.

    He then said that the society has found that when men wanted to step down as an elder, and it was not a health reason, it was usually because something unscriptural was going on in their lives, like adultery or alcoholism or… APOSTACY. I assured him that none of these applied to me. The said that most of the letters and phone calls that came into the society nowadays was from brothers and sisters questioning the organization about the things they were teaching and asking them to explain something they had read on the internet. He said that this was a big problem and that was tired of their teachings being questioned. He then asked if I had any questions about the teachings of the Watchtower.

    I am a wuss. I admit it. I hate confrontations and though I have many questions, I assured him that I didn’t that everything was okay and I just needed some rest.

    Well, after an hour and a half, he is not going to accept my resignation. They need elders and I should just get my children to sit quiet during the meetings. He also said that when the Circuit Overseer comes next week we would talk with him together.

    Oh Boy..!!!

  • Gary1914
    Gary1914

    I have had time to think about it since last night and I learned something about myself. I am influenced by peer pressure. I mean just like a teenager I want to be one of the gang, one of the cool ones and as an Elder I can be that.

    Jehovah, Jesus, none of that enters into why I continue to go to the Kingdom Hall. I don't see Jesus or Jehovah and I don't feel them. It's because I want the people in the Hall to see me as a spiritual man, whether I am or not. I don't serve Jehovah, I serve the elders and the brothers and sisters at the Hall. They are the ones whose approval I covet. I know that much of what is being taught is just tripe, but I don't really care, and I bet some of them don't care either. It is like a game that we are used to playing.

    But now that my kids are singled out and may be adversely affected by this nonsence, I don't think I want to play anymore.

    Oh....... boss just returned. I have to get back to work.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Just write a letter to the CO now saying you have talked with the elders and still want to step down.

    Ex-elders, what should he do. Can they hold him hostage? Did you or another elder get past this?

    Blondie

  • YoursChelbie
    YoursChelbie
    I don't serve Jehovah, I serve the elders and the brothers and sisters at the Hall. They are the ones whose approval I covet.



    This is an easy "set up trap" to fall into because ----------------(finish the sentence)....

    ...You have no other social circle!

    They alienate you from all your "worldly" friends, neighbors, relatives.

    If you leave them now, after so many years you'll have to start over. Well, that can be fixed! Those of us on this board who have left have been in your shoes. We know the isolation. You can to go to the Ex-JW meet up site and see if there are other ex-JW families with children in your local area. You'll find people who will accept you for who you are not for a "Non-existant persona" you put on and take off like a mask.

    Reach out also to your work associates--they have known you for a while. Also your relatives who are non-JW.

    I got tired of living a double life and my family is happier for it. Keep reaching out to those I mentioned (and this forum) for support. I promise: you won't need to put in "pioneer hours" or sit and listen to the same old man-made rules (that they can judge you on) to impress anybody. That will be a huge load lifted from your shoulders.

    YC

  • avishai
    avishai
    He then said that the society has found that when men wanted to step down as an elder, and it was not a health reason

    It IS a health reason. Exhaustion.

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