Posts by Garnet

61

Where were you on the a.m. of 9/11/01?

by rebel8 in

jw
friends

i was at work -- a manager in a hospital that is the regional treatment center for one medical specialty...region includes nyc.

someone came & grabbed me hard by the arm and pulled me into a room, where i saw every single mgr.

sitting silently watching tv.

Garnet

Hubby and I were home sick from work, we turned on the t.v. to watch Jerry Springer (Mindless t.v. is great when you are sick). Then the news came on. We both said "what idiot crashed into the World Trade Center, How could they not see it!" (it just didnt look "real") Thats when second plane struck, and I started to get nervous. I had my laptop open and ready to go, sent instant messages to my office and they hadn't heard the news yet - One of my managers was supposed to be on that plane, his business trip was cancelled last minute the evening before - to this day it gives me the chills.

There is a thread up with a man with his hand on the wall of missing people, my old collegue are of those missing. I never met them, but they worked in the NYC office of my last company.

All those poor innocent people

Garnet

28

YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

by Gill in

jw
friends

well, today i began to think there really was no point in trying to argue a point in a reasonable reasoning way with a jw, after all, there's non so blind as those who will not see.. i saw my, mother, again and we had a humungous scrap on the wtbts.

she wanted to know if i expected her to return to the rcatholic church as that's the religion she originated in.

she told me how she had been badly beaten by the nuns and that on one occasion when she had missed class and gone to the cinema instead she had received such a severe clobbering that she could barely sit down for a week.

Garnet

NO!!! That was completely different.
Well! Would someone like to explain to me how that is different and why sins of catholics can't be forgiven.

It's obvious - your mother's anger toward Catholics is based on the beating she received from the Nuns. That beating had a direct affect on HER - the physical and emotional (psychological) damage done by a pedophile to his victim do not affect her.
You probably already know this, but your Mom is lacking in the empathy and compassion departments.

Your Momma, wouldnt happen to know mine? would she? Mine was abused by a member of the church - which by all means, I can understand why she hates the Catholic Church....but she takes it the extra mile. I feel for her so terribly, but at the same time, you cant say a word without her getting pissed off and going on a rant. I have been abused by someone close to me and maybe I am different, but I have decided not to let it interfere with my life because it can destroy it.

Of course the Catholic church is "Different" though...it isnt the WBTS!!!

Anyway....where is that damn soapbox so I can hop down?

Garnet

5

Conditional Love/Heart Reading

by Garnet in

i had a conversation the other day with a relative - we started talking about death and so on, so forth.

i havent been attending for almost 3 years now and really havent been harrassed too much - just ignored.. i stopped attending meetings for a number of reasons, a few were belief differences which i knew would become trouble, but the main reason why i couldnt attend anymore is i felt fake.

but i felt that people only wanted to associate with me because we shared one thing and one thing only....a belief.

Garnet

I had a conversation the other day with a relative - we started talking about death and so on, so forth. I havent been attending for almost 3 years now and really havent been harrassed too much - just ignored.

I stopped attending meetings for a number of reasons, a few were belief differences which I knew would become trouble, but the main reason why I couldnt attend anymore is I felt fake. Not sure if it was just to myself, to others, or to whom. But I felt that people only wanted to associate with me because we shared one thing and one thing only....a belief.

If my grandmother was alive today, she would be livid that a group of people simply cannot show love for fellow man. She was friends with a few witnesses and refused conversion a long time ago. She was very happy being a devout Catholic - and one who had her own opinons on the church at that. But she always taught me to belive what was in my heart.

Back to my original sentence, in that conversation - my relative said "I will see so and so in the new system, but since you stopped beleiveing that..." I stopped right there...how dare this person tell ME what is in MY heart. Only because I stopped going to meetings and bowing down before the Watchtower Society every time they told me to makes me stop beleiving???? Since when can a human read another's heart condidtion? I am saddened today because of this accusation and feel that no one has the right to decide what I do and do not belive.

This same person made a statment that sat with me and reminded me of a lot of posts I have seen here. They said "so and so married out side of the truth and he beats her. While I feel bad for her, it is her own fault for not marrying a brother." It's things like this that make me so angry! Of course, I have also heard this relative say that the friends are tired....I am so confused on their stance, if there is one.

Me on the other hand, just thinks that we should all be good to one another and that there is a God (or higher being). I do follow my old beliefs that my grandmother instilled in my as a child and probably always will. I try to look at people as they all have good in their hearts and sometimes just need some love.

I really needed to get this off of my chest and I appreciate you listening. Please add/comment as you would like...I guess I am just set back as to how conditional love can be to some people.

Garnet - just truly saddened today

21

Help - shunning stories needed

by Mr Rocky in

my letter to the editor to the davenport times just came out on june 30, 2005. the spokane spokesman review is interested in doing a story about shunning as a result of reading my letter.

the religion reporter wants to start working on it wednesday.

does anybody want to tell their story of odd things they have been shunned for by jw's.

Garnet

I am not currently df'd or da'd - neither is my hubby.

but we have been shunned on occassion and were also marked before our wedding. We were both in horrible car accidents and have been unable to attend meetings. I spent all of my free time taking care of him, switching off with his mom - you see he had a brain lesion and almost died (he was struck by a drunk driver). He did everything right, refused transfusion (actually, his mother did that for him), they refibulated him twice, etc... Anyway, I was accused of having prematial sex, with someone who was a complete vegetable, and couldnt even move out of bed. I denied the acusation, and before I knew it, we were marked.

So this happened about 1 month before our wedding, we still went on "with the show" - 2 weeks prior, hubby went to 1 meeting because the elders wanted to talk to us (go figure) and we were told that we could not longer use the KH and also that no one felt that we were spiritually mature enough to get married.

On to the "shunning" out of the 150 (*&^%$) who came to our wedding - 1 person talks to us. no one EVER made an effort to see how we were doing, if we needed help - 4 years later, I am still in and out of hospitals, hubby is still having surgeries, NOTHING. Not even a phone call...OH except that one time when I got a call from someone in my wedding party to see if I was "still attending meetings" and when she heard I wasnt because of my health, she abruptly ended the conversation and I never heard from her again.

Although it isnt as severe as losing my family, since my family isn't in the Org....it hurt. I considered the elder that was going to marry us as a parent to me - I dont hate any of them..I feel pity. As they don't have love.

I love you all - Garnet

34

i'm tired of it.......

by kittyeatzjdubs in

jw
friends

all my life, i've been covering over things, to keep the peace in my family.

i've been scared to reveal my true identity on this site b/c i might be discovered by a lurker....but i've been thinking about it a lot lately and i've come to the conclusion that there's no point in lying about it anymore, and if it's meant to happen...then it will.......so, with that being said.... .

my name is jobeth white.

Garnet

JoJo, congrats on the liberation!

I am still in hiding, although I only have 1 family member still in and only 1 friend who still talks to me because I do not attend meetings. The rest of my so called friends stopped speaking to my husband and I once we stopped going -- we were both injured in auto accidents (seperate occasions) and have medical issues that have prevented us from participating wholy in meetings, FS, so on and so forth. Once that bull$h*t started, my husbands eyes were opened to the kind of people that were in our congregation...it took me much longer to realize, as I wanted to badly to have "friends". I was told that my real friends were not good in "Jehovah's eyes" and as a good brainwashed dub...I backed away from my friendship. Anyway..enough babble from me! I am now back in the saddle with the rest of my old friends :-D and have never felt better! They understand my injuries and will take care of me when I need it, unlike those in the cong. who turned their back.

CONGRATULATIONS!

Garnet

24

Playing games at a wedding shower - is it wrong?

by Bonnie_Clyde in

my daughter-in-law recently gave a very nice baby shower for her cousin.

the next day at the meeting she was called into the library and counselled for playing games.

i asked her what the basis was.

Garnet

My Wedding shower was somewhat normal - it was my Bachelorette party that sucked.

My Maid of honor asked me what I wanted to do (inside scoop) so I could be surprised (he he he). I wanted to get all dolled up and go into town and visit a nice (read classy) jazz club and hang out with the girls. I was thinking of something nice...couple of martini's, walk around town, nothing too much, just fun!

Well, someone caught wind of our plan and ratted us out - the elders accused us of: planning to get drunk, planning to pick up men and then staying up all night (ooooo I'm bad).

So instead...we went for chinese food, I had a scorpion bowl and was in bed by 9:30 (wooo hoooo)

The bachelor party on the other hand...they got crazy drunk, went to play pool, hit on woman and were puking on the way home...they got home at 3 a.m.

They were councelled the next day for their behaviour

But we were still "bad" for wanting to go to a "night club"

I just laugh now when people ask me about it...

30

Headaches?????

by whyamihere in

jw
friends

i have been getting headaches for the past year or so.

i have never had this problem in my life with bad headaches.

now it is not huge pain but a 5 out of 10. it is everyday and hits me at 2 pm.. my neck is stiff and it hurts.

Garnet

Blacksheep,

For the "migraine diet" they tell you to take away things, like what you have already tried. then you slowly add back, keeping track of each individual item, how your body reacts etc... I havent tried it yet, but I do hear that it does help out.

I am glad to hear that you were migraine/headache free for so long - I have been a short term sufferer so far, but I suffer almost every day with the chronic pain, I finanlly got acceptance into a great pain clinic up my way and can't wait for my appointment!

What is sad to me is how little some people know about Migraine Disease - I was suffering from what was thought to be a TIA (or mini stroke) and the ER doctor told me it was impossible, as I was too young (my neurologist went through the roof). Since a TIA is very hard to diagnose and cannot be picked up with a CAT scan or MRI, it would virtually be impossible to find out what happend. The ER doctor just gave me a CAT scan and sent me on my way (heavily medicated of course).

Anyway, enough of my rant...I do suggest anyone who has sudden headpain to go see their doctor. Although it could have a simple answer like a strained muscle, or ergonimic seating, it is always better safe than sorry.

Garnet

30

Headaches?????

by whyamihere in

jw
friends

i have been getting headaches for the past year or so.

i have never had this problem in my life with bad headaches.

now it is not huge pain but a 5 out of 10. it is everyday and hits me at 2 pm.. my neck is stiff and it hurts.

Garnet

I am also curious...are we talking migraine, tension, or just a plain ole' bad headache? There are so many types out there...just curious.

Curious Garnet

30

Headaches?????

by whyamihere in

jw
friends

i have been getting headaches for the past year or so.

i have never had this problem in my life with bad headaches.

now it is not huge pain but a 5 out of 10. it is everyday and hits me at 2 pm.. my neck is stiff and it hurts.

Garnet

I am also a chronic migraine sufferer as well as a chronic daily headache sufferer (wonderful isn't it?) I also suffer from chronic pain - all due to a auto accident.

Anyway, from doing a lot of research - everyone here has most of the things covered. Please do keep a "headache diary" track down all the mediations you take, and please watch your intake of over the counter medications. They can cause a spiraling effect called a rebound headache.

I would also first make an appointment with your PCP and then if they continue, a Neurologist. A chiropractor can help your situation, but that of course would depend if it is muscular or skelelal. I have chronic spasms in my neck and have been prescribed a TENS unit for home use to try and relax my neck problems. Of course, it has been 4 years and after about a dozen different therapies...what else can I try?

Feel free to PM me if you would like to talk more - you can also visit the about.com website and look up migraines/headaches - they offer great advice/information there.

Garnet

90

Name Things That You Can Be Counseled For

by minimus in

jw
friends

i'll start.......a woman wearing a skirt higher than her knee and a child crying during a meeting

Garnet

Hello hello!

I was counseled for taking care of my fiance' (now husband) when he was in a horrible car accident. My mother in law and I took turns watching him for the first few days, he was pretty banged up and since we couldnt be there at the same time, I didnt have a chaparone. They refused to marry us in the KH after that (they decided to tell us, less than 2 weeks before the wedding.) OH, and the elder backed out too he wanted us to "push back the wedding"! To top it all off, they accused me of sleeping with him while he was incapacitated (sp). I just cried and couldn't belive my ears!

Another time it was in the middle of summer and it can get very hot and humid here, I was maybe 20 at the time, wore a sundress, but it covered my shoulders, nothing to risque', above the knee though - one of those wrap dresses. The elder and his wife drove the group to their house and in front of the car group said that I was dressed inappropriately for service, that I was showing too much leg and then made me wear his wifes clothes. I had a full ankle length skirt on, her shirt came to my elbows (all black) I was sweating like a piglet! I had to roll the skirt 2 or 3 times to keep it from dragging on the ground! Of course in meetings though, I have seen their daughters wearing mini skirts and I am 8 years older than these girls!!!! hmmmm beleifs or fashion?????? This is the reason why I left ;) JK

Garnet