goals or interests? gardening...this year i'm planting a french potager garden, reading....presently reading the Power of Now which I highly recommend to folks exiting JW's. I also am enjoying Beverly Lewis' books about the Amish which is akin to JW's with all their rules and excommunication. She just came out with the last book of a four part series...The Revelation which I plan on reading before the summer. Writing...I'm presently in the process of trying to get a children's book I wrote and illustrated on Juvenile Diabetes published. My three year old grandaughter who has jd and lives with us keeps me quite busy. We are having fun living guilt free, going to Sunday School, celebrating birthdays and holidays....all the things I missed with her mommy and other now adult children. I could go on and on. Life won't be long enough for me. Most of all I'm enjoying a loving relationship with a "wordly" man who is more Christian than the majority of jw males I knew. After being away from JW's for 5 years after 25 years it seems like a fleeting moment because I'm enjoying life to the fullest and making up for lost time. Grace
homesteader
JoinedPosts by homesteader
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27
What are your goals in life that don't involve the WTS?
by John Doe ini'm just curious.
i know this is a wts discussion forum, but by some posts, it seems as if the wts never leaves some heads.
also, a lot seems to be conspiracy theory.
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Governing Body and rank and file liabilities
by greendawn ini get the impression that generally the rank and file jws are to be thought of as victims whereas the governing body are the real and only villains in this organisation.
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do you think this is a valid opinion especially when it comes to the elders and circuit/district overseers who willingly enforce the gb's often criminal policies?
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homesteader
my sentiments exactly....one elder in a congregation was so stern everyone called him the gestapo. he imposed things all on his own. control freak. we are all adults with a free will. God bless the innocent children though.
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Are you addicted to this website?
by Podiatrist ini mean seriously, since im not a jw perhaps id have a different opinion about it all.
but a colleague from work says she dont want to come here as she got addicted to it and couldnt get anything else done.
she apparently knows of similar other cases.
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homesteader
If someone is addicted to a website or anything, it isn't the object that is the problem. I'm finding this website to be very helpful in the the jw healing process . If it is an addiction to some, I guess it's better than some other evils that cost alot of $$$$$$$$$$$$$ and damage your health. cheers.
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Is it better to just LEAVE or FIGHT?
by ljwtiamb inalthough, i have not been victim to the same level of damage from the wts as many of you on this site, i have noticed that it is very difficult to fight such a large entity with deep pockets and passionate (though misled) supporters.. .
since i am still in the very early stages of leaving/fading, i wonder:.
i have already spent the vast majority of my life sacrificially serving the interests of this org.
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homesteader
Get yourself out safe and mentally sound and then help others in anyway you can. Even though we were "victims" those of us who were adults gave our consensus.
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10
The Watchtower Preaches Failure ... and Heartache
by metatron indriven by panic, the governing body's current theme continues to dominate their magazines.
and assemblies: the next generation of young witnesses are "leaving the truth" and must be.
stopped!
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homesteader
excellent post. i felt like such a failure because none of my four children stayed. i was a jw for 20 some years and it took my two oldest teenagers who are now 28 &30 to get me out. they were baptized when teens under pressure from myself and the cong. When they were df'd I thought to myself nobody is going to take my family from me. I tried for a few weeks not speaking to them, but couldn't live with myself. That along with the generation that wasn't going to pass away opened my eyes tremendously. I regret all I put those poor kids through and when they share how they felt I apologize. They are so forgiving and don't blame me, but I tell them that I was the adult in their lives and should have known better. i'm proud of my kids for being able to think on their own and that they had the ability to make the decisions they did at such a vulnerable age. i feel for all the kids that have had their parents cut them out of their lives at such a critical time in their lives when they are entering the adult life. Seems to me they need us now more than ever.
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A Course In Miracles
by homesteader inis anyone here familiar with the book a course in miracles?
as i look back in retrospect this book was instrumental in the deprogramming of my mind from all the jw indroctination.
one of the most useful things i learned is to stop judging and you will not be judged, stop reviling and you will not be reviled.
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homesteader
Is anyone here familiar with the book A Course In Miracles? As I look back in retrospect this book was instrumental in the deprogramming of my mind from all the JW indroctination. One of the most useful things I learned is to stop judging and you will not be judged, stop reviling and you will not be reviled. I'm am so happy to be free from my career of judging people for anything and everything. In reading many of the posts here it seems like some of the folks are very quick to judge others. A Course In Miracles might help.
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homesteader
I wouldn't say it destroyed my view of humanity, but it certainly changed it. Now that I'm on the outside looking in I can't believe how warped their belief system is and sometimes I wonder how I got caught up in it all. This post helps explain it...all the attention and "love" in the beginning were what a lonely soul like myself needed. I gradually and subconsiously built up a support network outside of the org. before I faded. All the wonderful "worldly" people I met have restored my faith in humanity. For the first time in my life I am experiencing unconditional love despite my human failings....farting, burping, being independent, reading secular books, sleeping in, telling lies now and then.
Despite what the org says, there are also many neat adolescents that are not JW's who have morals and aspirations to contribute to society in meaningful way. One included is my 19 year old son who just graduated from a Catholic School and plans on becoming an elementary teacher. I got away from JW's four years ago. He went to the prom and I was so proud and happy for him. It blew my mind to think that at one time I thought this was an evil thing and actually lost sleep over my older children wanting to do such a worldly thing. Grace.
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Milk, Vaccines, and Carbohydrates
by Kaethra in(apologies for splitting this post up, but i cant seem to get my browser to allow me to post in paragraphs!
) since leaving jws i find i am much more willing to accept health care advice from the traditional scientific sources.
i get a little twitch when i hear someone say i read a book about that and so-and-so, the doctor saidya da ya da ya da (against traditionally accepted advice).
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homesteader
Think for yourself and listen to your heart. Sometimes it's easy to drift from one group of control freaks to another. Life isn't black and white or gray, there is a lot of color. Hopefully your new friends will be able to accept you unconditionally even if you don't agree with all their ideas and beliefs. I'm a health enthusiast and think that all things in moderation are appropriate. God put you here to enjoy life on this now beautiful earth, filled with beautiful people and good things. ENJOY!!!
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Need Some Advice
by skeptikchick ini was just wondering if anyone could enlighten me with their experiences in regards to telling their parents about a serious relationship with a non-jw.
my boyfriend who i've been with for 2 years now and live with, does not know how to approach things when his mother (a very devout jw) comes to visit this summer.
we have separate rooms, and so we were thinking that we basically have two options.
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homesteader
that's a hard one. as a mom of 4 adult children I think that you should be honest with this women. i didn't like a lot of things my kids did but after getting over the disappointment I chose to love and have a relationship with them with no regrets. mom might be disappointed that her son isn't living up to her morals but most moms love their kids unconditionally. i think being dishonest would hurt her more. respect her and don't sleep with mr right while she's visiting. my adult kids smoke, which I detest. I know they smoke, but out of respect they don't smoke around me. i've heard many jw's comment that that some of the "worldy" boyfriends/girlfriends that their children have are better than the jw's. i'm guessing that's how your boyfriends mom is going to feel. best wishes. grace.
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Do you still shudder at the sight of a Elder?
by kls ini remember so long ago i thought elders were like a god and would always make sure i smiled at them and put on my innocent act in front of them .
even being out of the cult it took me years to finally get it through my head that they are human and not a god as they themselves think.
then one day a jw elder came to my door and at that time i had a newborn baby that i had been up with all night .
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homesteader
It's funny you raise this question. Last night I was on this site for the first time in a few years and just today I ran into one of the elders who many jw's looked up to because on the surface he was kind, soft spoken and understanding. When I was a JW he was the one everyone in the circuit would seek out for help. Anyway, I was visiting my daughter in a town about 30 miles from where I live in had to go to the hardware store and there he stood on a pedestal so high I couldn't make eye contact with him. I was busy with my grandaughters so pretended I didn't know him and was as polite as I am to everyone. Thanked him for holding the door etc. Then, my husband I stopped at the local Subway for lunch and lo and behold he was in there ordering lunch. I remember how I used to think that was a sign from God, but now I just thought "coincidence" He smiled and looked at my husband and said hello. Last night I was reading on line part of the book In The Truth and I that made me feel somewhat sorry for this chap. He was born and raised a JW and doesn't know anything different. It felt good not to feel angry or degraded just because someone doesn't speak to me. Sometimes I experience what I have tagged JW PTSD and actually my shrink has confirmed it for me. Sometimes when I run into a JW I experience all of the same feelings I had when I was there....shame, guilt, not living up to whatever I'm supposed to be living up to. When I run into them I am polite but am the one not to make conversation because I don't want to drudge up all those old feelings. I kind of felt ashamed about how I used to look up to the brothers and when any of them paid attention to me that would make me feel so good. Since I didn't have a husband that was an elder or ms, I never was in the clique so it was always like Alice in Wonderland looking through the glass ceiling. By the way, for the first time in my life I am free of organizations....seems I gravitated from one to the other. Was raisied in an institution, became a jw and then was employed by a state university. I'm now born free :) I've been attending a Methodist Church for a few months but when it came time to be a member I couldn't do it. I don't ever want to belong to an organized religion again in my lifetime. I have a hard time in church screening out the messages that JW's taught, so don't read the Bible much but read other spiritually encouraging journals. Anyway, I love this site because it has given me alot of support reading other people's experiences and it helps to know I'm not alone.