Exposing one's identity. When?

by kairos 100 Replies latest jw friends

  • kairos
    kairos

    Well today is the day folks.

    I just told off an elder on the phone after he said "that sounds apostate", "Of course I'm an apostate!"

    I live in Napa. Been here for 25 years.I'll be 47 on Thursday.
    Attended River Park, Redwood, Skyline and Oak Knoll congs.
    Been out for over two years.

    Everything is unraveling fast with this AUS RC event.
    ( Which I told him about and of course he dismissed it. )

    He tried to take up a position of an informed person.
    I told him that he is not qualified to comment on something he has ZERO knowledge of.
    I reminded him that the entire proceeding is being carried over the internet.
    He wanted to know how I knew what was being said. Transcripts, streaming and archived video!!

    Also, thought he might like to know the entire "Flock book" is online for PDF download as part of their legal pack of exhibits for the case.

    I called him a "MFer" ( I used the real word at the top of my lungs ) next because he still wanted to defend the WT policies instead of recognizing the impact this is having on the victims. Doubt if he has ever had that happen.

    So... that happened.

    ( ps, lurking elderz or sneaky reporters: Only pursue me if a media frenzy sounds fun to you )

  • cappytan
    cappytan

    Damn. You rock, bro.

    Not sure why someone would click "dislike" on someone standing up for what is right.

    (Oops. Looks like that was me.)

  • done4good
    done4good

    I like your no nonsense approach, but once you go public on an ex-JW forum, you may as well DA. Google knows all.

    Its a lose-lose situation. You ultimately have to chose between your freedom, and your own innate desire to please others. That is the way it works once you have been a JW. Sure, there is always some compromise that can be reached, but you will never be just like anyone else who has never been one. There is always something you will have to hide from some JW, at some point, because the organization programs its members to reject anyone who no longer believes, even if only through one's own natural tendencies to succumb to cognitive dissonance. There is no such thing as leaving with dignity, if you are honest about it. That is exactly why I ripped the band-aid off 8 years ago, and DA'd. No way was I going to fake it, no matter how small.

    Make your decision wisely.

    d4g

  • zimunzucz
    zimunzucz
    I don't know your situation, but heed the advice of a mid 60's and over 25yr seasoned ex-JW- don't do it. At some point you may move to a new city and want to be just a normal person- not somebody who was totally fooled by the WT crapola. Just mentioning that you used to be a JW would the kiss of death at a Superbowl party.
  • kairos
    kairos

    I am very confident in myself and my position.

    I made it very clear that I will never recognize any of their authority and will never participate in any judicial setting.

    They can do whatever they please. As I no longer CARE AT ALL!

    There is so much more to this story and I must admit that I am going out of my mind.

    I'm a small business owner and am staying put in my town and will engage anyone with facts at this points. I feel liberated.

    I can't imagine the legal dept would give them the green light and offer to support them in court.
    The truth of the matter is they WILL BE DEFENDING THEMSELVES with their own money to, what, DF me. Brilliant!

  • LisaRose
    LisaRose

    That's a bold move, I hope it works out for you.

    I have made no effort to hide my identity, the few JW family I have treat me as DF anyway so I have nothing to hide and anyone who knows me would be able to figure out my identity pretty easily, but I'm not putting my name and address out there, just because it's the internet and you never know what kind of wacky people are out there.

    You live in Napa? Dang, we're practically neighbors, I live on the other side of San Pablo Bay.

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    If you'd been single, the dating possibilities would have opened up like a tsunami.

  • Oubliette
    Oubliette

    Good for you.

    Too bad you're in NorCal and I'm in SoCal or I'd take you out for a beer!

  • Crazyguy
    Crazyguy
    Way to go, I almost dA'd but then changed my mind . At times I think if I had gone ahead and done it would have been easier to talk with my kids. It's hard to say may have lost my whole family too. This cult is evil and it's hard to know how to react at times. But the more that come out and become vocal the more the cult dies.
  • jws
    jws

    I've thought about the same thing. As a freeing experience. My info shows I've been on this forum for 13 years and I've posted tidbits here and there, bits of life. So even without real names, people I know could read my posts and guess who I am.

    The reason I don't is relationships. I have two sisters who are still in and I have other JWs I might run into that I might want to say hi to. I'm not DA or DF and the chance of running into them is slim, but still.

    I also want to stay off the radar as an ex-JW because they occasionally knock on my door and I love to challenge them. Which they'll do if they don't know I'm an ex-JW.

    You can always use an alias. Aliases can still be useful. What's a name anyway except for legal things? If you want to be a local resource, announce your city. People can always private message you here. And even with those you deal with privately, you can still use an alias. Maybe set up a local meetup. Use your alias. Maybe even think of one more like a real name and use it. Who's gonna know?

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