Is "unconditional love" a myth??

by Brummie 171 Replies latest jw friends

  • jeanniebeanz
    Before we go on, perhaps you might define what you mean by 'tradional understanding of the term'.

    See below... :) "People generally use the term "unconditional love" to mean the absolute most love that a person can have and don't stick to the dictionary definition of the word unconditional."

    Jeannie, this implies a condition. It can no longer be described as 'unconditional'

    As I've stated, I do not believe that it can be described as unconditional in the current dictionary sense but whose to say that all of humanity are bound to follow the narrow definitions set in a dictionary? Do not meanings change for words over time? You only have to get ahold of a dictionary from 10 years ago to see words take on different meanings based upon common usage. For me, it is okay that people say that they have unconditional love even though I believe that there is a limit because I believe that they know that too. I say that there is nothing that my kids could do to make me not love them, and that is what I will tell them and anyone who asks. However, I know that somewhere out there exists a circumstance that would separate me from the love of my kids or vice versa.

    The problem is that a logic based word is being used to try to describe something that runs much deeper in the human psyche: emotion. Mankind has tried its best to understand emotion, to box it into a defined category, to analyze it and dissect it and make it an exact science. Mankind has failed miserably because I will submit to you and everyone else that this is impossible to do. The problem is not whether or not there is unconditional love, but that the word does not exist to describe what this special love is. Perhaps unconditional is the closest word that we have and we use it because it is as close as we can get at this time.


  • jeanniebeanz
    Mommy, what if I became a Republican and drove an SUV.

    Don't push your luck you little bastard.

    Thank you, Hillary. I've never had my sinuses rinsed with hot coffee before and it was quite an exhilarating experience.

    *wipes keyboard and changes shirt*


  • LongHairGal

    Maybe to some degree totally unconditional love is not realistic. The closest you come to it is the parent-child bond.

    I suppose most friendships between people are somewhat conditional, in that you are not going to rob their house or do something so outrageous that people would recoil in horror! So in that respect there are unspoken conditions in our relationships with people we know.

    But the the friendships between JWs are conditional in almost every way. They can hardly be called friendships at all! At best they are conditional acquaintances.


  • Odrade

    maybe the more appropriate question would be "do you believe you are capable of unconditional love?"

    My answer... No. I have limits. For certain people (my dad, my brother...) those limits may be so far out there that I cannot anticipate ever reaching them, I know that for me, I am not capable of unconditional love--no matter the illusion of it.

    AND, I do not think that makes me a terrible person. In fact, I believe that makes me quite a sane, rational and ethical person.

    Regarding HS' repeated question about the sodomizer/murderer scenario, this is exactly the kind of thing that makes me feel that unconditional love is an illusion.

    As far as god having unconditional love... well, he rains fire and destruction upon the wicked, if that's love, I don't need it. I think at best he is probably unconditionally dispassionate, occasionally straying into "oh will you look at that... interesting." I'm not real big on the personal god thing, which may explain my disbelief in "unconditional love." It would be interesting to see if the belief/disbelief in the concept correlates strongly with belief/disbelief in a loving, interested god.


  • Doubtfully Yours
    Doubtfully Yours

    There's no such thing as "unconditional love".


  • LittleToe

    Is it possible to have unconditional love for your pet?
    Dog, cat or... fish?

  • hillary_step
    Is it possible to have unconditional love for your pet? Dog, cat or... fish?

    As in, forgive them father, for they know not whom they eat? Their ignorance is the condition.


  • Odrade

    I'd say this is as close as I (at least) will ever come to "unconditional" love. But... do I love them because I picked them out due to their "love-ability?" Do I love my dog even if it goes into a cocker rage and chews up the 5 y.o. neighbor boy? Probably. Do I love my cat if he suddenly starts peeing all over the house for no good reason? Probably. But do I develop the same kind of connection with a creature that I do with a human? Absolutely not, and that is the qualifier. My love for them is conditional on their being the "pet" and I the "owner." In spite of the fact that the "condition" is basically immutable, it is still a condition for my love.

    Fish... lol. I don't necessarily love the fish, i just love the hobby. And if I have one more problem with a tank like the one last week... conditions, conditions. It satisfies some geeky need, I guess. Although I do have this one fish.... *wanders off to play with the fishies...*

  • Simon

    (I will admit to not having read all this topic so apologies if this has been covered already)

    Is unconditional love a myth?

    No, some people obviously have it. They love their wife / kids / president / fuhrer whatever no matter what they do.

    Is unconditional love a good thing?

    No. See 'fuhrer' in the list above. Some people step outside of the boundaries of deserving love. Should Mr & Mrs Hitler have loved their son unconditionally, no matter what he did? No, of course not.

    The presecution rests.

  • Simon
    Mommy, what if I became a Republican and drove an SUV.

    Don't push your luck you little bastard.


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