You don't have to read this... Feedback Wanted

by Sparkplug 77 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sparkplug

    sorry I missed ya tijkmo.- I am waiting on another breathof life. I get these moods.

  • Sunspot

    {{{{{ Sparkplug }}}}}

    HOW did I miss this gem the first time around? I just sat and read the entire story and laughed at you wonderful sense of humor, and cried with so much of what you shared.

    This has got to be one of the most thought-provoking accounts that I have ever read. You definetely have a real gift in writing like this, and I personally wouldn't change a word of it. You have a real touch and unless you are unhappy with the way that you phrased something---I would leave it as is. I devoured every word just the way it was.

    You are such a beautiful person and to have gone through just what we have read amazing. Regardless of the region that you were raised in (which is the opposite of my being raised in the area of western MA---long cold winters and green mountains) I felt the same desperation of someone who just didn't seem to "fit in" and always had to make the best of things to survive. I so admire this quality.

    I eagerly look forward to your next installment(s) and I am sending two very warm hugs----to that little girl that you wrote about---and to you, the woman and mommy that you are today.

    big hugs,


  • Gretchen956

    Sparkplug I am in awe, what a story! I wish I had the gift to tell mine with such wit. Its amazing how many of us have these types of stories to tell. When one of them is put to print with this type of talent, it helps others to understand what hell really is. I can't wait to read the rest.



  • Sparkplug

    Sherrie and Annie!

    I am so excited to get to post...I ran out of them yesterday. I did not really even know I could do that. Thank you for your words and the big hug. I really REALLY needed that. I have been having such a terrible day. Glad you like it. Hopefully I will get inspired. Trying to catch the groove again. II see a bunch of free time and focusing coming on in my direction. So maybe I will dicipline self and get busy.,

    Nilnuf, sorry to totally mess up the laughter track. I guess I wrote it that way on purpose because, well a lot of things I laugh at are not so funny and hard to get thru without laughter and yet it hurts. So if written like that,maybe the reader will catch some of the confusion and mixed feelings....?

  • nilfun


    Sunspot said it better than I:

    I just sat and read the entire story and laughed at you wonderful sense of humor, and cried with so much of what you shared.

    Keep writing.

  • coolhandluke

    I've got to bttt this. This is by far some of the best writing I have ever seen anywhere. I am awed, impressed, saddened, happy, angry. I think I've got them all. Truly wonderful. Where the hell is the rest of it Sparkplug?!?!


  • Sparkplug

    Thanks CHL- I think it is somewhere in my head. Have been so overwhelmed, that I cant get my mind around my thoughts and collect them into a work of anything. It will come. Not sure when. thanks again. Your post reminds me that I have personal goals to work on. This baby being one of them.

  • Sparkplug

    Ok, for you that read the other post, about my crazy life, this is the beginning of what I want to be a book and somehow I need to merge that other post into this format. But I am on a role now, so that helps. So if you are interested, here is the other part I need to continue with and cross them together. As I told somone in a PM, there are a million stupid stories inside my story and I think it can be done. It is just finding something to kick me in the bumm and get me moving.

  • cognizant dissident
    cognizant dissident

    Sparkplug: Your story is very compelling, as is your way of telling it. Riveting. Unique perspective. From a writing standpoint, I would say that you were rushing the story somewhat. In your mind, you see all the rich details. It is a very real picture to you. When you are writing it you are there, re-living it in your mind's eye. The PTSD helps with this. But your reader is not there with you. Close. But we are missing rich detail. Flesh out your surroundings a bit more. And your characters. Give us more description so we can be right there in that trailer or that dog house with you. You did this very well when you were describing playing in the desert with your friends and with your mother cutting your hair.

    I was diagnosed with PTSD too so I know it can be a double edged sword when it comes to writing. It gives you such vivid recall, which is great for telling a story, but it also can be too vivid. Writing it can take you right there, to the places that scare you. You might be tempted to rush through, because the details are too painful to sit with or share in detail. Understandable. Or you might rush the story, just to get it all out because it is trapped inside of you and it feels cathartic to get it out. If you are writing for therapy that is fine. If you are writing to bring the reader into the experience with you, then you may need to be willing to stay and visit those places in the past a little longer and describe them in a little more detail.

    Hope this helps. Keep writing. You've come a long way baby.


  • damselfly

    Girl, I love the way you write.
    Big thumbs up and I'm waiting for more.


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