What Is The Most Ridiculous Thing You Have Heard From A Witness?

by minimus 133 Replies latest jw friends

  • dozy

    I remember during an otherwise uneventful meal with an elders family we were talking about some famine in the news and he made a stupid comment about how wonderful it was that no JW had ever died of starvation. I was like - huh? - and he referenced Jesus's words about how even the sparrows are fed. I told him it was nonsense - JWs had died of starvation in concentration camps and inevitably died in famines where hundreds of thosands or even millions died.

    He adamantly told me that wasn't true - Jehovah always looked after them to ensure they had enough food - and the conversation started to get a bit heated till I just said "well - we will just have to agree to disagree". In hindsight - it was something of the start of my journey out when I began to realise the degree of selective stupidity you had to accept to stay a JW.

  • zeb

    One elder saying his daughter had a 'phantom pregnancy' (she was breastfeeding her first born.)

    and re movies; an overseer at a convention. 'we should not watch "E.T." as he represented the anti-Christ.'

    This got the biggest...Huh? from the audience.

  • punkofnice

    Surly old geezer claimed to be 'anointed™', 'I'm going to see Jehovah™ face to face."

    Me: "Not if he sees you first."

    I always thought most of those who claimed to be anointed™ were attention seeking weirdos, even when I was a fully fundie Jobot.

  • OrphanCrow

    My mother: "Everybody in the New World is going to be a mulatto"

    Me: "Huh?

    Mother: "Oh yes! Eve was a mulatto you know. She would have had to be. That is how we ended up with black people and white people. She would have had to carry the genes for both. Mulatto people are so pretty aren't they? They are such a beautiful color."

    Me: silence...

    Another one:

    Me visiting a friend and a JW man comes to the door.

    My friend: "No thank you. I have my own religion that I follow"

    JW guy" "We are not a religion. We are a lifestyle"

  • awake!watcher

    We have the truth!

    Millions now living will never die!

    Anything Tony Morris has ever said.

  • Simon

    "In the new system, cars will run on a teaspoon of water"

    I don't know why people will have cars or who'll be building the roads or where all the supply of materials will come from or which genius will come up with the super efficient engine.

  • Simon

    That after all the suffering god allowed to happen, at the end of the 1,000 year reign of Christ he'll decide (for some reason) to let all the demons out again to have another crack at it.

    Because god loves us all so very much.

  • sir82

    re movies; an overseer at a convention. 'we should not watch "E.T." as he represented the anti-Christ.'This got the biggest...Huh? from the audience.

    That one actually made it into print, in an Awake from '82 or '83.

    They didn't use the word "anti-christ" but it did mention something about how l'il ET represented a false Christ or some such.

  • fastJehu

    *** g83 7/8 p. 27 Christ or E.T.? ***

    Christ or E.T.?

    E.T.—The Extra-Terrestrial burst on the scene in the United States this past summer, attracting theater audiences in record numbers. In only six weeks it grossed nearly $150 million. With spin-offs in E.T. dolls, toys and other merchandise—as well as the movie’s release in other parts of the world—it is estimated the public could spend a whopping $1 billion on E.T. Why the E.T. fever?

    The movie depicts an ungainly 3-foot (90-cm)-high creature from space, stranded on earth, who befriends a ten-year-old boy named Elliott. E.T.’s friendliness and benign powers, such as healing the boy’s cut finger and bringing flowers to life, win the affection of Elliott and his family. Sadly, a wasting illness appears to take the creature’s life. But when he is inexplicably “resurrected” before Elliott’s eyes audiences cheer. His touching good-bye, when E.T.’s alien friends take him home, leaves hardly a dry eye in the theater.

    Interestingly, many have noted parallels in the story to that of the life of Jesus Christ. Said Professor Albert E. Millar, Jr.: “I think the thing that struck me most was the idea of the capacity to heal, and then when E.T. died and was resurrected.” We have in E.T., then, an enchanting Messiahlike figure that gives momentary emotional release to our need for a true friend with powers greater than ours. Therein lies the movie’s great appeal.

    Despite its seemingly Christian message, however, the movie subtly condones youthful misbehavior. In an early scene we find youths playing “Dungeons and Dragons” in a smoke-filled room with a lighted cigarette on the table. Later on, when E.T. gets drunk sampling beer, and Elliott in telepathic sympathy feels the effects, it is all portrayed as something cute. Further, some of the language used by these children is gross profanity. This, along with the supernatural aspects of the movie, has bothered many Christians.

    Whether parents or their children see this movie is, of course, a matter of personal choice. But because of the movie’s great popularity, let us not forget that it becomes an effective vehicle for sugarcoating youthful conduct that is definitely wrong.

    E.T. may be a skillfully constructed and highly entertaining movie. But it provides no substitute for our True Friend, Jesus Christ, who saves us from this dying, wicked world. After all, E.T. is make-believe. Christ is reality.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    E T was real! i saw him in a fillum.

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